Nancy Perkins (1)

You spot the editor of the student paper, Nancy Perkins heading down the sidewalk towards school.

She has a smirk on her face like she just learned some juicy piece of gossip she cannot wait to expose in the paper. She is well dressed as usual. You do not know if you have even seen her wear the same outfit twice in a month. The outfit she has on probably costs more than most teens make in two months of after school jobs.

You walk up to her. "Hey, Nancy."

"Oh hey, you want to take out an ad in my paper for a girlfriend. Looks not important and low standards a must?" she says with a snort of derision.

"No, nice crap hat by the way."

"What the hell are you talking about?" she says angrily. Reaching up and slightly adjusting her beret.

"That beret is so when you crap at school, you crap in the beret because your mom needs a stool sample to take to the doctor to see what kind of STD you have."

Nancy's demeanor changes. She looks scared now. "STD?"

"Yeah, don't worry," you say. "Your secret is safe with me."

"How did you find out?!" she says, looking around to see if anyone else can hear.

"Don't worry about that," you say. "What you need to worry about is making sure you get that stool sample in your beret by the end of the day, so you can take it to your mom, but first..."

"What?!"

"If you don't want me to tell everyone at school you got an STD from having anal sex with Mr. Gomez, the janitor, you have to do something for me."

"Oh god!" says Nancy. She is blushing and looks like she might have a panic attack. "Please, just don't tell anyone!"

Now it is your turn to smirk.