Megan's struggle

Megan's POV...

I stormed into my expensive bunker paradise I both loved and hated. It was my sanctuary, a paradise. A safe haven now filled with memories of a man I couldn't let myself have feelings for, unfortunately those fucking feelings didn't get the memo. It also stunk of inheritance, privilege, and expectations. Grabbling some sexy underwear I began putting them on when I noticed something by my foot. A fallen pack of smokes. Must have been Ryan's. Overcome with too many different thoughts and emotions I hastily grabbed the lighter and pulled out a smoke. I sat on the bench and lit the stick between my fingers, the thoughts fading behind the anxiety of the growing need inside of me. A personality I tried so hard to repress.

....POV...

M sighed and placed the smoke between her lips and expertly took a puff, fuck it felt good to finally be free. Megan did her best, she really did. But Tom and everything all at once broke me free. I let the smoke dance in her lungs, rolling her eyes back at the chemicals rewarding her brain. I half sighed, half moaned. Fuck I needed this smoke! I loved how our body buzzed!

Looking at a nearby mirror I smiled. Fuck we looked so hot in our tight, curvy body and her tiny orange lingerie. How we confidently oozed mature sexuality and sensualism with every drag while giving the reflection a steamy stare. There was a powerful resonance inside of us. All those guys, Tom all admiring her naked body as she ran past. All those thoughts and fantasies, god how they wanted to fuck her! I coughed and choked, taking a far too powerful drag as our body flared at the thought. I felt our eyes water but instead of slowing down, instead of stopping, I reached with her free hand and mauled a breast. "Fuck me!" I moaned. "God all of you! Show me what you want! Have your way with me! Fuck Megan why hide away this body of ours!" Our hand found the inside of her bra and squeezed a nipple, moaning and rubbing my lips on the cigarette. Men were all the same deep down, primal, driven by their innate desires. They were a peak specimen, a mate worth fighting for.

Looking up dazed into the light, lost in a horny cloud I blew smoke patterns in the air above us. I felt high and loved it. But it wasn't enough. We needed to be craved, adored, fantasized! Tossing the spent cigarette I put another behind our ear and grabbed her phone, walking to the theatre. Logging into Megan's instagram I rose her phone to find the best angle to show off how our big bubbly butt looked in her tiny thong. A picture was snapped and before even hesitating I clicked post. Our fingers flew between every sexy photo, captioning lewd and horny messages. Showing off our body. Getting an intense thrill and shock of arousal with every post. Comments began flying and I smiled. Dick pics, awkward hellos, compliments. We were being showered in appreciation.

M....Megan....

M pulled her next cig from her ear before she paused taking only a single drag. Megan frowned at the photos. Sure all these guys were proving her right. They all saw her new body built for sex, seeing how thirsty she was acting. Like dumb moths to a flame. Such was men to a sexy and willing woman's vagina. They didn't have any thoughts for who she was, or if it was a good idea, they were lost by the flicker of her shutter, the flicker of her flame between her legs. But the faint voice in the distance shook her. It was Ryan calling for her. She had finally found a man who even in such a fucked up situation treated her as she secretly dreamed for years. A sexy gentleman. He sounded worried. She remembered their argument. It was too hard for her to explain.

Megan's POV...

"I promised not to catch feelings," I muttered taking another drag and spinning a finger around the seat under me, "I said I wasn't able to have a relationship like that. Long dick was inevitable. IS inevitable. He see's me for what I've become, Ryan see's me for who he thinks I can be." I sighed and took another hit. I wiped a tear, "Thing is I can blow Long dick and walk away fine. I keep fucking Ryan and sticking around and...I will hurt him."

So what do I want? Our mind screamed. Idly I read the messages and admired the pathetic attempts at sending enticing photos. It was exhilarating but the sound of the pool in the distance reminded me of something...that made all that so hollow. "Fuuuuck. I'm really doing this?" I said to my darker side. I laid in silence, wiggling my butt in the air to cheer myself up, "I'm going to try to be better...to be the woman I want to be."

I heard him approaching and wiped my eyes. Killing the smoke and tossing it away hastily. He entered the room. He made no noise, I saw no signs. But I could feel him, his presence, his soul. "Megan...."

"I'm sorry," I sighed. "I feel lost. I still am not really ready to talk about it but...It's really important to me to prove I can be better. That I am in control of this. The idea of being locked away forever, how is that different from fully losing myself?"

A long silence. I heard his somber voice and felt my heart flutter, "I didn't think about that. You're the strongest person I know. But I know you are trying to resist temptation, I was just trying to help."

I chuckled and finally gave him a sad smile, "Men trying to help keeps them blind from the truth they need to help their cause. Sometimes the best way to help is to listen, to empathize, to ask. If I can't go out there and still be me, then I'm as good as lost regardless. No point hiding."

"And that is truly what you want?"

I hesitated in his eyes. I could see he was nervous. Possessive. Did he feel the pull too? I couldn't lose myself in thoughts like these. I needed to keep some distance, at least til things were sorted. "Yes. But Ryan...thank you. I feel how others feel. It's a nice break to feel such warmth and caring, like a blanket of security safe by it's powerful presence. Of course it wouldn't be fun without that hint of lust you try to hold back." I wiggled my hips and smiled, feeling his eyes on my beautiful butt.

Ryan didn't take his eyes off my prize, "Tom is gone. He and Don went to the school to try and hack the security systems. Maybe see who was around when the book was stolen."

I pulled myself up and hastily scrolled through my phone, "Fuck! Why didn't you tell me beforehand? I thought I was the brains here!"

The man looked back at me confused, "I mean I wanted to but it sounded like you needed space. What is the problem?"

I rolled my eyes, "The problem is the past two days this asshole has been hitting targets to cover his tracks. Once the key people who could be used to track him are dealt with what do you think his next target would be?" I really thought he was smarter than this, "EVIDENCE! He would cover up his tracks so nobody can randomly find out about him. After this he would be truly off the grid and have gotten away with the crime. You just sent them both straight at him!"