Meeting Santa and Ruining Christmas

“Intruders, huh? Here to steal my list?” Santa pointed at the USB drive in Kim's hand. “No wonder I couldn’t find it. I'll be taking that back, thanks.” Santa was quick to snatch the drive out of Kim's hands and plug it into the surprisingly hi-tech dashboard in his sled.

The screen below the reins turned on and a list of names appeared. A very short list of less than a hundred names.

Oh crap. They were busted! What possible explanation could they have for breaking into the North Pole? She needed a good excuse! If she told the truth, their client was sure to be fired... but maybe he deserved it, after all. "Yes, I came here because of your stupid list!” Kim said, trying and failing to stand straight on the ice.

“Kim stop!” Harako pleaded. She couldn’t tell Santa the truth, that would expose their client! Needless to say, Morpheus would be very, very angry if that happened.

Kim stumbled next to the sled, holding onto it for balance. She stood atop the runner to give her feet some respite from the cold ground. With one hand still folded across her chest, she used the other to point at the screen. “See this? There are a hundred names here!”

“Yes, all the good boys and girls-“

“ONLY a hundred. Do you know many kids there are on Earth? This isn’t even 1%! This isn't even 1% in a small city!”

Guaria stepped in front of Kim to try and defend her boss. “Well, we have very strict standards. Only the truly good-“

“Standards my frozen ass!” Kim shouted. “People don't even believe you exist because of this bullshit! Not even my cousin Jeanny is on this list, and she is the sweetest little gal I know. Do you want to give kids hope and happiness? Then expand this list! That's why I came here!”

Harako breathed a sigh of relief. Ok, so Kim did not intend to betray their client. That was good... not that the overall situation was any better. The floor was cold! The air was freezing! Harako quickly scampered next to her friend and stood behind her. Kim didn't have much body warm to speak of, but at least she covered her from the wind a bit.

“Ok…” a seemingly unfazed Santa said. “So let me see if I understand. You somehow reached the North Pole and infiltrated my workshop because you wanted to add more names to my list? That's a first, at least you aren't trying to steal Christmas like the last five intruders. I still have two questions, however, why did you come here naked?”

“I didn't. Ask her what happened to my clothes.” Kim pointed at Guaria.

Guaria fiddled with her index fingers. “Err, it was a weird chase, sir… We all lost our clothes, somehow.”

“Question number two, is she your accomplice? Why is there a ghost in my workshop?” Santa pointed at Harako. Crap, the big man realized that something wasn't clicking. A ghost and a human at the north pole? Someone must have sent them, and if he suspected Morpheus was their boss...

“….err,” Harako wasn't sure what to say before Kim abruptly pulled her in and hugged her.

“Why wouldn’t she be here? She is my bestie!”

“…Err, yeah, sure. That works.”

Kim squeezed harder, her arms tight as mechanical vices. It was as if she was trying to squeeze the air out of her friend 's lungs. “Hari, this is the part where you say that I'm your bestie too.”

Harako tried to pull away from the awkward embrace, but Kim was too strong. “…Erm… yeah, sure Kim. You are in my top five friends too.”

“Fuck you mean top five? We both know you don't even have five friends-”

“Ok, Kim, we can try it your way since you came all the way here...” Dragging himself to the seat of the sled, Santa pressed some numbers on his dashboard. The list grew exponentially, now it contained thousands of names.

“Boss, what are you-”

“Here, I even added your cousin to the list even though she doesn't qualify anymore. Thousands of kids who would have received some Christmas cheer this year.”

“Would have?” Harako asked.

“Yes. Sadly, your little stunt twisted my ankle and I'm pretty sure broke a rib too. Also, we are missing our reindeer. I'm afraid I won’t be able to make any deliveries this year, save for dragging myself to miss Clause's nursery. Ohohohoww. Hurts to laugh.”

“W-wait, does that mean that we-?”

“Yep. Sorry to say this, girls, but you ruined Christmas. Don't worry, it happens sometimes.”