Meet the Fake Boyfriend

Wednesday, September 5th

Andy couldn't help but reflect on how much busier his week kept getting each time he relived it. He had spent much of his first Freshers week sitting alone in his room, waiting for time to pass. Today he would be cheering on one gorgeous female acquaintance in her football match, before sharing a spliff with another in her room and. depending on how that went, he would use the evening to check in on one of several other romantic interests. Perhaps that was how Fresher's Week was supposed to be? Right now, it was time to aid a damsel in, if not distress, at least inconvenience.

"It's Andy isn't it?" the pretty professor asked with a smile as he took a box of her ex boyfriends belongings from her once more "It's so nice when I get a student who takes my class because they have a genuine interest in political philosophy, rather than because they think it will be an easy credit for some insane reason"

"Yeah, what's up with that?" Andy chuckled.

"I'm not living out of my car, by the way. All of this crap belongs to my ex boyfriend. I'm taking it back to his place since we just split up"

"I'm sorry to hear that"

"Don't be, he was a total idiot. Actually, he still is. He's causing me so much grief at the moment, which is why I just want to give him his shit back and be done with him forever" she paused and caught herself, much like last time "Sorry, you really didn't need to know that"

"No, it's fine. Is there anything else I can do for you? It sounds like you have a lot to deal with at the moment?"Andy asked.

He was expecting to be politely dismissed like last time, instead Kara paused for a moment,

"Don't you have classes to go to?"

"No, my schedule is actually pretty clear today. I was planning to watch the Mansfield University Ladies football team at three, but until then I'm clear"

--

Well, this was interesting. Andy was sitting in the passenger seat of his hot lecturer's car as she drove to her ex- boyfriend's place. He got the impression she had brought him with her for moral, as much as logistical, support, and he was encouraged that she liked him enough to be relied on for that now.

"Sara informs me you'll be attending my book club tomorrow"

"Yes, if that's okay with you?"

"Of course!" Kara shot Andy a brief, conspiritorial smile "I get the impression she is quite taken with you. But you didn't hear that from me"

Andy was going to have to find some time in his busy schedule to finish that book soon. He had made a start, and it was better than he had expected, but he would need to read the whole thing to be ready for the probing questions Sara would doubtless have for him. It would be a shame to scupper the good impression he had apparently made on her right before their date.

"Okay, we're here" Kara pulled her car to the curb. She was looking a little nervous.

"You alright?"

"Yeah. This is going to sound super weird and highly inappropriate but.." Kara stopped herself "Actually, forget that"

"What?"

"It was just that....It might make my life a little easier if you could pretend to be my boyfriend for as long as we're here? It should help get Craig off my back if he sees that I've moved on. He's not violent or anything, just an annoying arsehole, and he ought to behave himself better if it isn't just me. You wouldn't even need to say anything"

"i'd be happy to, but won't I look a little young for you?" Andy wondered.

"Not really" Kara sized Andy up for a moment or two "You look quite mature for your age, I'd say you could pass for twenty two or twenty three. I;m only twenty seven. It isn't that crazy"

"Okay.."

"Besides, I like 'em young" she smiled and winked at Andy, before thinking better of it "That was a joke, by the way, before I get myself sacked!"

A joke that had given Andy a semi hard on.

They each grabbed a box, and Andy walked up the street to Craig's place with his hot teacher pretend girlfriend. He stood a little behind his lecturer as she rang the doorbell, and tried to look vaguely menacing.

A man of around Kara's age opened the door. He immediately glared unhappily at Andy,

"Hi Craig. I'm here with the last of your stuff"

"Who's this? A student?"

"This is Andy" Kara told her ex before adding, pointedly "No, not a student"

The look Craig shot Andy was priceless. He couldn't help but feel the buzz as he strode into the strangers apartment triumphantly, alongside the prize he thought he had stolen from him. The fact that Kara saw Andy as plausible boyfriend material, at least aesthetically, also gave him a real kick.

After a couple of frosty but uneventful trips back and forth to Craig's place with the rest of the boxes, Andy was sat next to Kara again in a now otherwise empty vehicle.

"Thanks for that Andy, you're a real star" Kara leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek "I think that's me done for the day now. I'd invite you back to mine for a celebratory drink, but you have your match don't you?"

Damn, a private drink at Kara's place sounded incredibly tempting, but Andy knew how pathetic he would look if he altered all of his plans for her now. Maybe next time he wouldn't mention the game.

"Yeah, I do"

"Perfect, I'll drop you off at the Sports Centre"

--

"Hey, can I help you?"

Tina put down the cones she had been gathering and walked over to Andy with a smile. She was wearing a tiny pair of shorts, which showcased her beautiful, toned and naturally tanned legs in their entirety, and a tight top that gave a similarly good impression of her breasts.

"I'm here to cheer on the Mansfield Ladies"

"Oh, wow!" Tina seemed delighted with that news "I didn't think we had any supporters, thanks so much for coming. I'm Tina, by the way"

"Andy"

He wasn't surprised the team had few fans. Andy had checked the league table online that morning, and the team had finished rock bottom last season, with barely a point to their name. To be fair, it seemed they were very new, having been started and mostly run at Tina's own initiative.

"So are you a big football fan then?" Tina enquired.

"Yeah, I can't get enough of it"

"Who's your team?"

"Leyton Orient"

"No fucking way!" Tina looked like she could have exploded with excitement "That's my team too! I've been desperately trying to find another O's fan to watch the games with. There's actually one on TV tonight, perhaps we could..." she suddenly caught herself "Sorry, there I am going at a million miles per hour like usual. We've barely met and I was about to drag you back to my place to spend the evening together"

Andy was more than happy to be dragged.

"Maybe we can find a pub to watch another game once we know each other a bit better"

"Sure, sounds good"

"Awesome! Well, I'd better get myself to the changing room to give the team talk. Thanks for coming, and enjoy the match!"

Andy sat directly behind the goal Tina was guarding once the match kicked off. She was actually really good - which was just as well, as the rest of the team were awful. She was facing one shot after another, but managing to deal with them all. It felt harsh that the most talented, and probably committed, player on the pitch was so likely to end up on the losing side yet again.

Utterly bored by the match itself, Andy couldn't help but be distracted by Tina's perfect body. Her physique was absolutely flawless and, with nothing else of interest to look at, Andy spent a good forty five minutes studying it closely. He imagined those beautiful, athletic legs wrapped around his neck, or his hands cradling Tina's firm, peachy buttocks. He bet she was amazing in bed - she was so full of energy and perfectly coordinated.

The half time whistle blew. Miraculously, and almost entirely down to Tina's heroic efforts, the game was still goalless. She smiled and waved at Andy before making her way back to the changing room for a fifteen minute break.

He would have loved to have stayed for the second half, ogled Tina some more, and let her know how brilliant she had been when full time came. On another run he would surely do just that. However. Aurora would soon find herself locked out of her room again, and Andy had already decided he was going to be on hand to help her with that.