Meanwhile, at the TVA 2

Wanda sat on a small metal chair, biting her lip, eyes nervously darting from side to side. She crossed her legs tightly, one lifted over the other, and crosse dboth arms over her chest, face red.

Patiently, Mobius went to sit on the other side of the table. He sipped his coffee, taking his time.

A moment later, and Wanda threw her hands out forwards, succeeding in doing little more than flashing her breasts. She squeaked, shook her hands again as if they were broken, and then quickly drew her arms back to her chest, a hand over each breast. She reddened.

"Powers don't work here, I'm afraid," Mobius said. "Relax. I just want to talk. You had, in your hex, an individual we've been looking for. I want you to tell me what you know."

"I swear, it was an accident," Wanda said. "I didn't realize what I'd done, what it meant for..."

"Relax, relax, no judgement here," Mobius said. "The timeline isn't about right or wrong, it's about what must be. What you did had to happen. I'm not concerned about that. I'm concerned about a certain blonde woman called Sylvie. May or may not have been naked, it happens."

"Oh," Wanda said. "Her."

She fidgeted. Mobius smiled amiably, making a note.

"You encountered her?" Mobius said.

"She's the reason I'm..." Wanda began. She wriggled again. "I thought she was part of... what had happened, the first time I saw her. She burst into my home, I thought she was part of the joke, and... No wonder she didn't like me."

"That doesn't give me much to work with," Mobius said.

"She was in the town almost the whole time," Wanda said. "You know that thing in older TV shows, where they have a woman getting caught naked, or losing her clothes, and it's always played for laughs? She was that. Most of the time. In the last stretch, the joke was how people reacted to her being like that."

"We don't get much TV here," Mobius said. He waved his hand around generally. "I've been getting surprisingly well-acquainted with the real life version though."

"Real life version?" Wanda said.

He looked pointedly at her. She squeaked, squirming again.

"So it sounds as though her trapping herself in Westview was accidental," Mobius said. "Interesting."

"Whoa!" Darcy stared out the window, mouth hanging open.

At first glance, the TVA looked like an office building. Tedious, cramped, grey - so when Darcy had managed to catch a glimpse of the world outside, it had taken her by surprise. Vast statues depicting the Timekeepers, and countless more buildings from a variety of styles, all stuck together. It went on as far as she could see.

"Darcy Lewis?"

Darcy jumped, quickly spinning around. At the sight of Mobius, she flushed, and hurried over to one side; there was a small, chest-high stone pillar topped with a flower vase. She crouched just behind it, smiling nervously.

"Oh. Hi," she said. "Er. Sorry. Thought I was alone."

"Aren't you meant to be in intake?" Mobius said.

"Yeah, about that," Darcy said. "They got as far as 'Sign here to confirm this is everything you've ever said' and ran out of paper. They're calling me back when it's finished printing."

She hesitated.

"So. Nice place you've got here," she said.

"Thank you," he said.

"Can't help but notice the lack of wardrobes," Darcy said.

"Oh, right," Mobius said. "See, normally when a variant comes in, they have the clothes they came in removed and replaced with a nice tan jumpsuit. Not the snazziest, but it works. But when someone like you comes in already naked, it's not safe to put them through the same process, so you get a skip ahead."

"You can't just do the dress-up stage separately?" Darcy said.

"Place isn't built that way," Mobius shrugged. "That's bureaucracy for you."

Darcy reddened, hands on the top of the pillar to try and keep balanced, hiding her body behind the slender stone. It was, admittedly, not completely successful.

Natasha let herself be led down a narrow corridor, until there were only two guards accompanying her. She'd been whisked out of Sokovia, left with only a vague idea of what was going on, but if she was taken prisoner, then she knew she had a duty to get away. She'd been given some weird, technological kind of collar, but beyond that was left as undressed as she had been when she met that blonde. Maybe it was a shock collar, or something like that. She'd find that out along the way, she figured; step one was making sure the guards didn't get a chance to activate it. As soon as there were as few as it looked like there'd be, she sprung into action, quickly crouching, tripping one and elbowing the other, before leaping up into her patented leg-scissor attack (and made a mental note to not rely on muscle memory quite so much when she was naked), crashing one guard into the other.

She paused for a moment on the ground, stilling her breathing to listen; the thudding of her knocking the guards **** didn't seem to have drawn any more attention.

Good. Natasha caught her breath, and lifted her hand to the collar for a moment; it didn't feel safe to tamper with, at least not here. That left escaping.

Quickly, she stripped the guard that looked closest to her size. She'd likely draw significantly less attention in that, than she would streaking about the place. Once she was fully dressed, Natasha stood, adjusted the top to better hide her collar, and shifted the helmet to draw as little attention as possible.

Then, swiftly, she set off. Step one, figure out where she was and who these people were. Step two, get out, get back to the Avengers.

She made it as far as an office beyond the world shifted. In said office, a guard's uniform, recently vacated, crumpled to the floor.

And in a totally different part of the TVA, a very naked Natasha Romanoff reappeared, standing over two **** guards, with Mobius standing a few steps away and waving a device almost apologetically. She blushed, the shock making her forget her training and quickly draw in both arms, trying to cover up with them, losing what little dignity she'd kept.

"Time twister," he said. "Sorry. Not getting away that easy. Shall we get on with this?"

"Please confirm, to the best of your knowledge, that you are not a robotic being."

There was a pause. Ultron lifted his arm to examine it, curious.

"Is this some kind of joke?" it said.

Three new additions to the TVA's ever-growing cell of naked women who'd encountered this Sylvie. Mobius exhaled. What was it now? Angie Martinelli, a Valkyrie, Pepper Potts-Stark, Jane Foster, Lady Sif of Asgard, Jessica Jones, General Okoye, Sharon Carter, Ava Starr, Hope Pym, Gamora, Darcy Lewis, Wanda Maximoff and Natasha Romanoff?

Things just spiralled more and more. He'd gathered a little more information from the interviews, but not all that much.

There was a vague crashing noise in the distance. Well, that was growing more and more common; he'd heard that Sylvie had left a portal open for some Vikings a while back. She was causing a bit of mischief. Still, the guards would normally deal with it.

There was another scream. After a moment, Mobius frowned. It was usually over with quicker than that. Slowly, he got up, moving to wander over. He heard a muffled, frustrated yell.

"That isn't some pretty bauble, use it! They're blocking my magic, but they cannot block that."

"I'm trying! It's not working!"

"Give it here! I... What is this place?"

Mobius raised an eyebrow. Well, whoever it was, they didn't seem to know that the TVA blocked most magic. Everyone was on equal footing here; he wisely stepped back, leaving it to the guards much more well-trained for matters like this.