Mama, I'm losing my mental

Vivian narrowed her eyes and looked directly at the stunned girl in front of her. She knew she was playing with fire here, and she knew that she was going directly against what she’d already promised herself- not pushing people’s buttons, not purposefully upsetting them. Whatever the reason she had for it, that was exactly what she was doing.

But… she couldn’t help herself. Yes, this was likely to make Cinder and Ella hate her even more, no doubt there. But she had already reached the conclusion that the girl in front of her was a lost cause regardless. Ella’s rant had made it clear that she didn’t see Vivian as a potential friend, and that she never would.

It hurt. But… Vivian could live with that.

What she couldn’t live with was the idea of spending the rest of her life with someone who was hiding something so serious from everyone.

So even if it would make the other girl hate her even more, even if it would ruin things… she wanted the two of them to be on the same page.

Was this the wrong time to have this conversation? Probably, yeah. But right now, they were alone together. It would be difficult for Ella to just run off, unlike if Vivian confronted her back at the hotel. This may have been her only chance to have an honest conversation with the other girl, where Ella couldn’t just run to someone else for comfort and protection. So she revealed the secret she’d been keeping to herself since the last challenge.

“That wasn’t Cinder who shot me, was it? I had a feeling, but I couldn’t be sure. You two… you’re the same person, but… you’re different.”

Ella’s face twisted aggressively. “N-no… stop it! You’re… you’re wrong, that… that wasn’t-!”

“So you’re saying you don’t remember?” Vivian crossed her arms over her chest and cocked her hip to the side, looking pointedly at the wide-eyed latina. “Shooting me, I mean. I know your memories aren’t linked together, right, Ella?”

Ella gulped and shook her head slowly. “B-but that’s…”

“It’s alright,” Vivian said gently, approaching her. “I don’t know why you think you had to hide that you were the one in control back then. It was just a challenge! What, did you think I would hold a grudge or something? I mean, it’s obvious you’ve got something against me, but-”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Ella screamed. Her eyes were wide and she started breathing heavily. “No… no… not now…”

Her fingers fumbled for her rubber-band as she struggled to stay in control of herself. “Thwap! Thwap! THWAP!”

Her dark features paling, she looked warily up at Vivian as she shook like a leaf.

“That… wasn’t… me!” She said through clenched teeth.

Vivian wasn’t sure how to respond to that. “…But it wasn’t Cinder. I know that much.”

Ella started to grind her teeth together.

Vivian fought back a sigh. This really wasn’t getting them anywhere. She thought that if she’d confronted Ella directly, that the other girl would crumple and fold like a wet napkin and admit the truth. But she was more stubborn than Vivian had given her credit for, it seemed.

Biting the inside of her cheek, Vivian debated what to do about this frantic-eyed girl as she stared at Vivian like a stray dog ready to lash out.

“Cinder’s the violent one, is that right?” Vivian narrowed her eyes. Ella’s flinch was confirmation enough. “She’s the one who does the bad things. The one who hurts people. That’s the way it works for the two of you. That’s your dynamic. But that’s not the whole truth, is it?” She stepped forward, knowing that she was getting into Ella’s space again, but not caring.

“You’re capable of hurting others, too.”

Ella’s eyes burned at her. “…Obviously,” she spat, glaring contemptuously at the other woman. “Anyone… can hurt someone else.”

Vivian nodded. That much was true. But what was also true, what she was beginning to realize, was that Ella didn’t want to be the one doing the hurting. Or at least, she didn’t want that reputation. She wanted Cinder to be the one blamed. Cinder to be the one who hurt others. Not Ella.

So that’s why she despises me. Because I saw the truth. That Ella can hurt people, too.

Frankly, Vivian found the whole thing ridiculous.

“…It was a challenge, Ella,” Vivian said, shaking her head incredulously. “Hurting me? You didn’t. You beat me, fair and square.” She held out her hands with her palms facing out to show Ella that she was completely defenseless and helpless. “You don’t even want people to know that you can win a challenge on your own?”

“It wasn’t like that!” Ella exclaimed, tugging at her hair frantically. Her face was looking more and more like Cinder’s as her eyes sharpened. “I didn’t, I-! That’s not… that’s not who I am! I’m the good one, that’s… that’s who I am… the good one…!”

“Then is Cinder the bad one?” Vivian coaxed, knowing this was another minefield but stepping into it anyway.

“No! Yes! I-! I don’t know!” Ella wailed. Her feelings were all a jumbled mess of confusing emotions and doubts. She wasn’t the bad girl, she didn’t WANT to be the bad girl! But calling Cinder the bad girl, that- that was wrong, too! Cinder, she was just… just trying to protect Ella, that’s all!

Like now, when she was trying to manifest, trying to defend Ella from Vivian’s words. And yet, Ella wouldn’t let her out. Because she was afraid.

“Just-! Just STOP IT already!” Ella screamed, stomping her foot on the ground. Vivian took a few quick steps back, startled by the sudden outburst of emotion.

Ella was panting. Or was she still Ella? Vivian couldn’t tell for a second as she looked at the top of the girl’s lowered head.

Then she slowly raised her head, and Vivian saw… …it was still Ella.

Looking at her with anger in her eyes, but it was Ella’s anger, not Cinder’s.

“…I’m not the bad one,” Ella said through clenched teeth. “I’m NICE. I’m KIND. I’m SWEET! I’m everything-! Everything Cinder isn’t! That- that’s who I am!”

“You’re just an ordinary girl,” Vivian said quietly. “You can be all those things and also do bad things too, you know.”

A crumpled, frustrated groan erupted from the depths of Ella’s throat. Her dismay was overwhelming, and Vivian could see that she wasn’t getting through to her. Not in any way Ella would allow her to, at any rate.

Vivian bit her lip. This was a massive failure, it seemed. She’d tried to get closer to the other girl, to reach her, and in the end all that had happened was-

“I don’t know what to do,” Ella said in a voice that was so quiet it barely managed to pierce the veil of Vivian’s own thoughts. The heiress looked at the shorter girl with wide eyes, not sure she’d heard her properly at first.

Ella had a look in her eye that burned with pathetic resignation. The sort of expression that said “I’m a loser.” “I’m a failure.” “I’m a joke.”

She was none of those things. But she had a chip on her shoulder big enough to stick your hand through, and a truckload of mental issues on top of that.

Vivian bit her lip, wishing there was some way she could get through to the poor girl. Some way she could reach her, help her understand.

But unfortunately, Vivian wasn’t as good with people as she wished she was. She wasn’t as smart as she longed to be, either. Maybe someone like Dawn or Dani could have gotten through to Ella, but someone like Vivian, who couldn’t make friends, who nobody really liked…

What was she supposed to do to help this quivering girl?

“It’s alright, Ella,” she said softly. “I won’t tell anyone. Okay? That you’re the one who got me.” She just hoped that Dakota wasn’t showing this part to Nick right now. (She wasn’t.)

“What does that matter?” Ella muttered, glaring at her. “You already know, don’t you? It’s worse than that. So much worse… I…”

She buried her face in her hands.

When she raised her head, there was Cinder.

“Stay away from her,” Cinder growled, advancing on Vivian with menace in her eyes. “You… you stay away from her. You never talk to either of us again, you hear me!?”

Vivian bristled. She looked at Cinder with a troubled expression, not expecting her to manifest at this point. With how fiercely Ella had held her back before, to turn things over to Cinder now just seemed so…

…Was she really that bothered by what Vivian had said?

“Cinder…”

“No! You can’t even use our names! You fucking rich bitch! Fucking puta! You…! YOU-!” Cinder was quaking like a skyscraper in an earthquake, ready to come crashing down on the woman in front of her. But there was an impotence to her rage, and both girls knew it.

She couldn’t really hurt Vivian. Not physically, anyway.

“You’re just a worthless fucking cunt who nobody likes,” she spat, throwing all the venom she could at the heiress. And she had plenty. “People just tolerate you being there. But nobody likes you! Fucking nobody! You’re… you’re a waste of space! Everyone would be happier if you were gone! If you just stopped bothering them and fucked off and died! EVERYONE! You’re a nuisance! A pest! Fucking garbage on the street! So just fucking die off already! Nobody wants you here! You’re just making things worse for Ella every second you’re still around! So why won’t you go away and let her be happy already!?”

Vivian had been deeply wounded by the cruel words that came pouring out of Cinder’s mouth. But by the end it seemed like Cinder’s vitriol was aimed at someone else entirely. And the burning tears that rolled down her cheeks told Vivian just who that was.

“…Cinder…” Vivian massaged her wounded heart and pushed forward, extending her hand towards the trembling girl. “Nobody wants you to go away.”

“SHUT UP!” Cinder screamed, shoving Vivian in the stomach and pushing her backwards. “You fucking bitch! Just leave me alone already! Leave Ella alone!”

And with that she proved Vivian wrong and dashed down the hall, leaving the heiress stunned in her wake.

“Cinder…” Vivian had expected an outburst like that. But being subjected to it still shook her deeply. She bit her lip and wondered how she could have handled that better. Well… there were certainly a lot of ways.

Like not even having that conversation to begin with. Just another mistake on my part, because of course it is.

Cinder was right about one thing. All Vivian ever did was make things worse.

I was just trying to understand her… trying to get her to open up to me… but that was wrong. I never should have done any of that.

Vivian could still see the twisted expression on the face of the girl who’d eliminated her from the last challenge. That wasn’t Cinder. She was sure of it. The cold look in her eye as she did so, it was completely different from the Cinder she’d known up until that point. So it had to be Ella. Right? Ella’s reaction had essentially confirmed it.

So why was Ella so adamant that it wasn’t her? Why was she so protective of the idea that she was the “good one” while also rejecting that Cinder was the “bad one”? When Cinder herself seemed to think quite lowly of herself regardless?

There were too many questions Vivian didn’t know how to answer. Too many questions she didn’t have the right to dig deeper on. That was the part that stung the most.

Vivian wanted to help the other girl. And like everyone in Nick’s harem, a small part of her wanted to be Ella and Cinder’s friend.

But as their confrontation had just demonstrated, that was a line of thought so absurd it couldn’t even be called wishful thinking.

Sighing, Vivian hung her head and struggled not to cry.

What will happen to Cinder, now that she’s on her own?

https://strawpoll.com/7rnzV24VWnO

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Vivian wasn’t the only contestant having a difficult confrontation with someone. Sylvia was having one as well. Only you could argue that the person she was confronting was someone even more difficult to handle than the mercurial latina.

“Settle things?” Lynette said with a sneer in her voice that she couldn’t project. “Shishishishi! There’s nothing to settle, you shitty little brat! Just admit it! You’re the failure! The sister nobody likes! Not Mommy, not me! I’m… I’M the one Mommy loves!”

Without her scissors to assert her menace, the hysterical notes in Lynette’s tone sounded more like a frantic panic than words spoken with genuine confidence.

Hearing that stung Sylvia. Not just the words, but what they meant for the doll she’d left resting on a shelf by the wall.

Given Lynette’s treatment of her, nobody would have blamed her if she just dropped the doll on the ground while she went to solve the puzzle. But that wasn’t who Sylvia was.

Lynette was her sister, in a way. And even if they weren’t technically sisters they shared a similar experience with Dakota. Lynette may have been more outspoken about her love and loathing for their “mother” than Sylvia, but so many things she said resonated deeply within Sylvia’s heart.

Sylvia couldn’t stand the idea of them being against each other like this. No, it hurt far too much for her to bear.

So she pushed through that pain and set her mind on mending their relationship. Not that they had a relationship to mend, but…

Maybe they could.

Sylvia brushed a lock of white hair out of her eyes and looked directly at Lynette.

“Your anger… your hatred of me, of Dakota… it’s because you’re in pain, isn’t it?” She said gently. “So much pain…”

“Shut up!” Lynette snapped. “Pain!? I’m a doll! I don’t FEEL pain!”

“Sure you do,” Sylvia said, knowing even Lynette had to understand how absurd that sounded. “Why else would you go to that extent to try and strike back at Dakota? It’s obvious how you feel. Obvious that you were hurt by her. And you tried to hurt her back. But you still love her, because she’s your mother.”

“So what!?” Lynette screamed. She wanted to throttle Sylvia, but her doll body couldn’t even move. “Abandoning me… after saying she loved me, that she wanted to be with me forever… how was I supposed to feel!?”

“At least you heard those words from her,” Sylvia said, pinching her lips tightly together. “My pain… was so much more than that.”

She could feel Lynette glaring at her, even though the doll’s eyes were incapable of expressing emotion like that.

“…Maybe I can help you,” Sylvia said softly. “Maybe… I can help take that pain away.”

“…What?” Lynette’s voice came out as a squeak for a second. Then her wicked laugh filled the chamber. “Shishishishi! How could you do that!? Bitch!? You can’t do anything! You’re just-! Just a-!”

“Maybe I can’t,” Sylvia conceded. “But I can try. My boon can help.”

Sylvia had copied Dani’s transformation once already. But thanks to her boon, she could get another shot.

Whoops, That Didn’t Count!: This round, if the contestant has a transformation that can only be used a specific amount of times (once per day, once per round, once per contestant, etc.) they will be granted a “do-over”, allowing them to use the transformation an additional time, overwriting the effect of the first.

With her boon, Sylvia could get another chance to copy a transformation. And she knew which one she wanted. She knew the transformation that could give her the best chance of reaching Lynette, so she tried again, expending her boon, and overwriting her first borrowed transformation, to Lynette’s utter confusion.

Ironically? It was yet another one of Dani’s transformations.

• Serene Serenade: Sirens are well-known for their power to lure people at sea to their doom. But Dani would never do that! Instead, her singing voice will be tuned so that whenever she sings, anyone who listens will be awash with feelings of peace and tranquility, and any troubles they have will be long forgotten. This will also give her voice a melodic quality to it that is very erotic and sensual. (Siren)

Feeling the power wash over her, Sylvia opened her mouth, and began to sing. Just a simple song. But one she carried deeply in her heart.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine… you make me happy, when skies are gray…”

She picked Lynette up from the shelf and rocked her gently back and forth as she continued to sing.

“You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you… …Please don’t take my sunshine away…”

“What… what are you doing?” If Lynette could move right now, she’d be struggling to break free of Sylvia’s grip. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t even cover her ears. As a doll, all she could do was sit there and allow herself to be serenaded, even as she seethed at the mere sound of Sylvia’s melodic voice reaching out to her.

“The other night, dear, as I lay sleeping…”

“Stop it!” Lynette protested. She didn’t want to be feeling like this. Feeling so… warm, and comforted! It made her want to wretch! As a doll, she couldn’t, but still-!

“I dreamed I held you in my arms…”

“STOP IT!”

“But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken…” Sylvia’s voice cracked, but she kept going, knowing that she couldn’t stop now. “And I hung my head and cried…”

“Why…” Lynette couldn’t understand what was happening. It didn’t make sense! Why was she feeling this way!? And why- why was Sylvia TRYING to make her feel this way!? WHY?!

Why would she do this for her!?

“I’ll always love you, and make you happy,” Sylvia continued, even as the lyrics turned painful. “If you will only say the same…”

“Sylvia, you-!”

“But if you leave me, to love another… You’ll regret it all someday…”

Sylvia had been trying to soothe Lynette’s wounded heart. But in doing so, her own became bruised and battered. Her emotions poured from her eyes and splashed gently onto the doll beneath her as she continued to sing.

“You told me once, dear, you really loved me. And no one else could… c-come between…”

“Sylvia…” Lynette looked up at Sylvia and really saw her, for the first time, in that pained expression on her face.

“But now you’ve left me… and love another…” Sylvia’s lips quivered as she kept going, finishing the song with all her heart. “You have shattered… all… my dreams…”

If Lynette could cry, she would. The twisted feelings etched in her breast… she had no idea how to express them. So she howled mournfully at the woman above her, as Sylvia’s painful song salved her wounded heart.