Lucy Chu, Chinese

Name: Lucy Chu

Age: 32

Nationality: Chinese

Occupation: Model, Rocket Scientist, U.N. Good Will Ambassador, Nobel Prize laureate.

To use human words only does a disservice to the divine beauty that is Lucy Chu. Whether it is her almond eyes or her be-freckled cheeks, mere words can not truly encapsulate the beauty that is this woman. Even the cameras on set struggle to accurately map every atom of her perfection, even in 4K.

"Hey everyone. I'm Lucy Chu, Playboy's Playmate of the year 2016. I'm also the first woman to earn a Doctorate in Aerospace Engineering from MIT. I'm a U.N. good will ambassador, and in my spare time like to run clothing drives for the needy."

"Impressive resume. Compared to that, this first question, this is going to sound pretty base. What's your fetish?"

"Well, I'm actually glad we can talk about this. I'm Chinese so naturally, I'm a voracious mastubator. However I think it's all too often that we focus solely on the fetishes encoded in our DNA. I've had plenty of time to have lots of kinky sex, and I've found several fetishes of mine that have nothing to do with my DNA. So anyone out there who feels self-conscious about having sexual interests outside of their genetics shouldn't."

"Truly inspiring words Mrs. Chu. Now, what's a Nobel laureate like yourself doing on a cheesy dating show?"

"In all honesty, I'm in it for the money. I recently discovered a metal-polymer that had a tensile strength beyond anything else we've ever seen. I believe it could be used as a building material in a space elevator. If I could marry Chance and convince him to spend his fortune on this research, mankind's progress as a space-faring civilization could leap ahead decades if not centuries. If my projections on the material are right, we could end up transporting goods into space for just dollars per ton."

"Amazing. Truly amazing. Do you have any clue how you're going to go about accomplishing this goal?"

"All I can ask of myself is that I do my best. I feel confident in my ability to satisfy men, but there are some beautiful ladies also in the competition. Nothings for certain, but I have my eye on the ball."

"Lucy freaking Chu? Are you kidding me? I-I should be in a competition to see if I can marry her! Oh my god, are you serious? The competition's over, Christ. How am I not going to pick Lucy Chu? I guess my own crippling self-doubt could sabotage my feelings. Man. Lucy Chu. Hey guys I'm not going to lie. I've already jerked off to her so many times, she's outstanding. The woman is a goddess. Dang. Two more girls. I don't know how you're going to follow this up."