Luckily, you have a crush on an idiot.

The silence stretches for a painfully long time as Maya stares down at the table, thoughtful expressions crossing her face in between cryptic smiles and quiet nods. She was working through something, but... The waiting was painful, as every drawn-out moment made your anxiety worse. It was only a matter of time before she gave you the **** penalty, but... You just had to know.

Eventually, though, she raises her head. You try and untighten the knot in your stomach as she intones the verdict.

"None of it lasted," Maya replies, as it takes you a beat to understand, "100% straight again. But it wasn't a total waste... I remember what it was like to like women. We can talk about a woman you have a crush on, and I'll be able to get it this time. At least, if your tastes match my temporary ones!"

And she just gives you this faint smile, as though... The two of you were sharing a secret about music or something?

...What the hell?

Did she... Just not understand at all your ulterior motives here? Honestly, that only made you feel worse - as though you weren't just scum, but super-deluxe scum taking advantage of your friend in a way so far past the pale that nobody else would even consider the possibility.

"But yeah, it was... Odd," She sighed, remembering her experience, "I was never attracted to women before, but while I was under her influence... It all just clicked. How I wanted to run my hands over her soft breasts, grab her plump behind, kiss those wonderful lips... How all of those details, that had once just seemed like a nice painting... Were suddenly something I wanted, all that I wanted."

You bit your lip as your imagination runs wild, of imaging Maya's new lusts unleashed on your breasts, on your lips, of her pulling you tight and making out with...

"And that should feel horrible, right?" She went on, "To have such a core part of you overwritten. At least, there should be some dissonance as I bring up that memory, right?"

You're not just scum, you're not just super-deluxe scum, you're super-deluxe-ultra-ultimatetainting scum. You just fantasized about your friend getting mind ****.

"But... There isn't," She continued, "I think back to that moment, and it all feels so natural, like I'd really found myself in that moment. And I think back to my normal fantasies now, and that feels so natural, like it's who I really am. And the me of now and the me of then... They both feel like me, just as authentic as ever."

That made you feel ever-so-slightly better, but you still wanted to crawl off and die in a hole somewhere.

"But, that's obviously not true, right?" You finish, shaking your head, "The me I am now is the me I've always been, and the me in that moment was a me rearranged by a demon. I might not have hated being like that, but I do hate how she changed me without my consent. Maybe some other woman would have loved her 'gift', but I'm not that woman. I like who I am just fine."

You just look away, face burning with shame and humiliation for your thoughts. Someone had tried to fundamentally change your best friend, the most precious person in the world to you, the woman that you could imagine being your soulmate under different circumstances... And you had looked at it like a fucking _opportunity. _A moment where you could have that which you'd promised yourself you'd forget, a moment where you'd wanted something that you knew would belong to some lucky guy someday. Her heart wasn't a fucking trophy, and there were more than enough women she could date without a demon fucking with their heads.

You had never, never felt so ashamed of yourself in all your life.

And still... And still. You knew in a corner of your heart, a dark little door had been opened. With all of the rumors of soul trading going around, there had never really been anything you had wanted. You were comfortable in your body, and any wealth or talents they might promise, you wanted to earn on your own merits. They had always just been an idle curiosity to you.

But the idea that Ms. Devlin could change something so fundamental about a person, could offer you something that would never be possible naturally... You finally saw the appeal, of how there could be something so far beyond your reach that you might offer up your soul in return.

And the only thing stopping you from going to her right now was because you would hate yourself so completely and thoroughly for violating your best friend's personhood that you half-believed you'd tear your own soul to pieces before you got there.

You wished that Maya had never told you any of this. That you could still believe you were a good person, and that you were never confronted with such a vile temptation.

"I see," You say quietly, "I'm sorry, that was a bit of an invasive question, wasn't it? I just... Had to know."

"I understand," She replied, "I'd be curious about how you felt too, if an incubi had rewritten you to be straight. Heck, I might even tease you a bit with some of my old crushes."

She just... Didn't get it, did she. How you felt. How you'd always felt. She knew you were her friend, and trusted you completely. And here you had been quietly thinking about how to utterly betray that trust.

...No, Maya was going through hard times right now. This wasn't the moment for a personal crisis. You put on the best smile you could muster, and offer up a joke in return.

"Ick, boys," You reply, sticking out your tongue, "Keep up that talk, and I have a few actresses to show you!"

"Mercy, mercy!" She laughs, throwing up her hands, "You're an hour too late for that!"

Stupid, perfect, straight, Maya.

You put up a masking smile over the pit of absolute despair in your heart, as you joke and laugh the woman you call your best friend - the woman you dearly hope to be best friends with for the rest of your life. No matter how little you deserve her.

You hadn't known what to expect, when Maya went to Ms. Devlin's office. You had expected her to succeed, and maybe need your emotional support. In your darker thoughts, when she hadn't come back, you started to fear that she'd been hurt, or even killed. When you saw her alive and unharmed, if broken, a sense of twisted relief had flowed through you - you'd thought that the worst of it was over, and you could be there for her.

But now, after having talked to her, to see how wretched you truly were... This was the worst day of your life, and now nothing would ever be the same again.