Lester Brags

As soon as Lester heard the apartment door shut, he sprang into action.

He opened the messaging app on his phone and typed “Go time” to Ned, one of his DnD and WoW buddies who did whatever Lester needed him to.

Today, that involved making Ned take the day off from his board game store and helping Lester with the next part of his plan.

Checking his watch, Lester waited impatiently for Ned to arrive. He didn’t invite people into his domain. Not ever. But sometimes new opportunities require evolution.

Lester heard a limp knock rattle gently on the door. He rolled his eyes and opened it.

“Come in, I need to get going,” Lester said, annoyed. He took a second to glance over Ned. Disgust flashed across his face.

Lester looked and behaved the way he did by choice. Ned was the opposite; life just seemed to happen to him. Sure, he was more outgoing and friendly than Lester, but he looked like the ultimate man baby.

Ned was around his height and sported the quintessential dad body. He was probably close to his own age, but Lester didn’t know for sure. He had never bothered nor cared to ask.

Today he was wearing baggy cargo shorts and an oversized, faded t-shirt that read ‘The Cake Is a Lie!’ His eyebrows were just as bushy and unkept as his beard and his face was framed by thick, horn-rimmed glasses. He was also failing at masking the bald spot starting on the top of his head.

His shoulders were perennially hunched and his short neck gave him the appearance of a turtle staring down an 18-wheeler truck, unable to do anything but stare back as the headlights got closer.

“T-thanks for asking me to help Lester,” Ned said excitedly. “I won’t let you down.”

“Of course you won't, Ned, a monkey could do this.” Lester waved him to follow as the smile disappeared from Ned’s face. Lester led Ned down the hallway to his bedroom.

“In the next 20 minutes the junk guys will be here. They are to take everything on the floor and the bed. Don’t let them touch the chair or desk - got it?”

Lester eyed Ned.

Ned gulped, “Got it.”

The floor of the bedroom was covered in filth. Dirty clothes and dishes piled everywhere. There were only a few spots open on the floor between the door, computer, and closet. It seemed like Lester had recently thrown more objects and clothing on the floor - almost like a dumping ground for unwanted things.

“Is there a problem, Ned?” Lester asked with a pointed look on his face.

“N-no, no problem. I just didn’t know why I was coming here.” Ned replied.

Lester had no intention of letting Ned in on his plans. He liked to keep his business and his social life completely separate. Still, he did feel the need to brag to Ned to ensure word got back to his group. “This is all for a woman, Ned.”

Ned’s eyes grew at the mention of a woman. This was a detail Lester had never shared before as members of their group were not usually in position to boast about the opposite sex.

“Now, they need to hurry up and clear all this shit out as fast as possible. At noon some house cleaners are coming to tackle this room and the rest of the apartment.” Lester began to walk back to the door. “Make sure the guys take the bed and mattress, too. Another one and some furniture is coming that I’ll need you to assemble.”

Lester put on his shoes. “Oh, and all this furniture in the living room goes as well. Nothing stays. Got it?”

“Got it, Lester.” Ned paused. “Is she hot?”

Lester smiled. “A total smoke show.”

Ned gleamed “The guys won’t believe this, I can’t wait to hear what they say.”

“Do a good job today, Ned, and maybe I’ll show you a picture.” Lester left to attend to his busy day.