Later at work that day . . .

I walk into the office and see this stunning Latin MILF sitting at Annas desk. I walk up to her.

Maria: "Oh! You must be Eugene - I am Maria, I'll be replacing Anna for a few days."

Me: "Yes, I am. It looks like Anna left the place in good hands."

We resumed working. About an hour later I turned to talk with her.

Me: "By the way, I hadn't heard anything about Anna. Is she okay?"

Maria: "She's on sick leave. Nothing major, but the boss really needed her latest project out the door by next week and asked me to step in. So, to answer your question, she's... okayish."

Me: "Nonetheless, I am glad to have you on board."

Maria: "Well, that's very flattering, but any specific reason?"

Me: "It's nice to see a new face around the place. It keeps from it feeling like a prison where all of us are trapped until the end of time."

Maria: "Heh, just until the end of the shift, then? Of course, there are days when there's not much of a difference between the two things."

I smiled and turned back to work. Two hours later I see Maria at the printer.

Maria: "...Any reason why this thing hissed at me? I am pretty sure they aren't supposed to do that."

I check the printer. It looks like she put the paper on the wrong tray. Also, somebody left this eldritch symbol stuck behind it. Guess that may have something to do with the hissing. I placed the paper in the correct tray and removed the symbol.

Me: "Go ahead, Maria - the hellspawn has been vanquished."

Maria: "Gracias, that noise was kind of unsettling. What was wrong with it?"

Me: "Nothing major, the machine is just... temperamental."

Maria: "I guess I need to get used to things around here, eh? Although the company may be well worth it... Thanks again, Eugene ."

Another two hours and I decide to make a phone prank on Maria. I pretend to call my boss on my phone with Maria right next to me.

Me: "Boss? Look, I don't mean to disturb you but... well there have been some problems with Anna's replacement."

Maria: "Eugene? Are you talking about me? Listen, if you've got a problem with me just come up and tell me, there's no need to..."

Me: "No, not at all, she's a great worker - it's just that... well, she's too hot."

Maria: "Que?"

Me: "Yes, I know - I've thought about baseball, done math, even pictured Homer Simpson in a bikini... Nothing works."

Maria: "Not even Homer Simpson in a bikini, huh? Have you ever pondered whether it isn't me that's so hot, but your unholy love for fat yellow men which has lead you down this awful spiral of depravedness?"

I put the phone down and face Maria.

Me: "Trust me when I tell you that there are some significant physiological differences between what you do to me and what happens when I see yet another Simpsons rerun."

Maria: "What I do to you, Eugene? Reminding you that we are on the clock and that we could be caught having an inappropriate conversation?"

Me: "See? Hot talk like that is what makes our love transcend the realm of the mere physical. Your brain turns me on, babe. Rawr!"

Maria: "Ha ha! Esta bien, tu ganas: I laughed and I am not even going to get your ass fired. Su caliente, culo tonificado."

Me: "Hot and toned, huh?"

She smiled at me.