Last Request

A deep mournful howl echoes through the forest shaking me out of my despair and bringing me back to the present. Without a backward glance I spring to my feet and run as fast as my legs would carry me. Twigs and thorns from the underbrush scrape at me but I sprint through without a care, my brother’s safety the only thing that mattered to me now.

“Lucian!” I call out frantically. “Lucian, where are you?”

“Here.” His voice calls back from up ahead. “I’m okay.”

I rush toward the sound of his voice and soon find him. He stands about 15 feet back from the winged creature. It lay at the roots of the huge poplar we had stopped at previously. It is facing back toward me and trying to crawl on its belly back to the stream where its master lay dead. It’s luster had faded and its great strength obviously waning quickly. The killing of its master had struck it a mortal blow as well. I hurry a safe distance around the struggling beast to hug my brother tight. He hugs me back just as hard, his slender arms still trembling in fear.

“It almost got me.” He whispers.

I kiss his head. “Oh thank goodness you’re safe.”

“I’m sorry I ran.” He buries his face in my chest. “I’m sorry I wasn’t brave.”

“It was you they would have hurt, not me. Don’t worry about it.” I assure him. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

I go to make my way back for the car but Lucian doesn’t move. His emerald gaze is focused on the heavenly creature still dragging itself along the ground.

“It’s a celestion.” He says. “The faithful servant of an angel. Mum told me they are an extension of the angel itself.”

I look at it just as it lets out a low heart wrenching moan of grief. “RRRWWWMMM!” Valiantly it continues to try to make its way back to its master.

Luci looks up at me. “It’s dying. The angel passed on, didn’t she?”

I look down at my blood stained hand and nod with a shuddering breath.

Lucian’s eyes widen. “Oh! Oh Jacob.”

“It had to be done.”

He brings my other hand to his lips and kisses it. “Thank you! You saved my life. I never should have brought us out here. This whole thing, this whole trip, is my…”

“It’s not your fault.” I cut him short. “It just…happened.”

Still looking at the creature, noticing it no longer glowed by its own power, I say in a quiet voice as I recall. “Her last request was for me to not let it die alone.” I shake my head. “We have to go. I have to get you somewhere safe. Whatever hurt that angel might still be around.”

I start for the car again, and again Lucian resists. “We…we can’t let it die alone.”

“Lucian. Come on.” I say more firmly. “It might have some strength left yet, we can’t take the risk. Look at it. It could kill both of us with one swipe.”

“I don’t think it will hurt you.” He says. “You’re a human.”

“What about you!?”

“Rrrrwwwmmm.” It groans, a bit weaker now. It’s limbs begin to fail it but still it struggles forward with all the strength it had left in it.

My brother takes two steps toward it. “This is my fault. I…I won’t leave it like this.”

“Lucian!” I snap, absolutely at my limit to not being listened to. My fear and my shaken state fueling that frustration. “Come here, now! We are leaving!”

He looks back at me with sadness across his pretty face. “Would you want to die alone? I wouldn’t. I’m staying Jacob.”

“Fuck! You little…” I bite my tongue. “Don’t you understand? This thing tried to KILL you! Its very existence is to kill things like you. And who knows, maybe another angel might come looking. Then what? Huh!?”

In a small hurt voice he whispers. “I’m not a thing Jacob.”

“I…grrr…I know that. I didn’t mean it like that. Just…come on! We can talk about this in the car.”

There is some doubt in him but then he stands tall and nods to himself. Reaching into his vest pocket he pulls something from it. “What does it mean to be a good boy…if I’m not good? Why do I struggle so hard every single day if not to stand up when it counts? Good isn’t how I’m seen. It’s what I do, it’s what I am. I am a good boy Jacob.” He says more fervently than ever before. “I am…good.”

“You did stand up when it counted sweetie. You protected me, remember?” My frustration is reaching peak levels. I just wanted him to be safe, why couldn’t he see that? “You are a good boy. You are good. You have nothing to prove to anybody.”

“Except myself.”

“Lucian! Fuck. I’m getting you out of here.” I insist as I storm toward him. “This is for your own good. You just don’t understand.”

Looking up to my eyes he says. “You sound like father.”

“I…” I go to rage back at him until the weight of those words hits me like a ton of bricks and stops me in my tracks. “I…” The words I was about to speak might as well have been my Dad’s in both tone and meaning. I feel the anger drain from my body. Who in the hell was I to tell Lucian right from wrong? Who was I to make his decisions for him? He was a grown man, he knew the risks even more than I did. My shoulders slump and I slowly nod. “You’re right. Fuck…you’re right.”

He approaches me. With one hand he takes my clean hand and turns it palm up, with the other her places something in it. As he pulls his hand away I see it is the slender leather collar I intended on putting on him at the end of the weekend.

“I would have been so happy to be your boy.” He looks deep in my eyes. “So happy. Thank you for giving me a chance Jacob.”

“Lucian?” I look to the collar then back up to him.

He takes in a deep breath and shiver runs through him. “I…I think I might be able to save it.” He says. “But I have to use my powers.” Turning back he approaches the great beast.

“Lucian.” I say as I hurry to walk up along side him and try to talk sense into him. “It's dying. Its master died. We can’t save it sweetie. And even if we could, then what? It will probably just eat you up.”

My case is falling on deaf ears though. He approaches the creature along its flank and leans down to run his fingers through its feathery platinum fur.

“I’m scared.” He whispers.

“It’s okay.” I stay close with him and rub his shoulder. “You don’t have do this Lucian.”

He takes another deep breath. “I want to. I need to.”

We walk around to the front of the golden maned beast. It lay there huffing and looking up at us with it’s red panda like face, it hadn’t even the strength the crawl anymore. It looks up and groans sadly. “Rrrrrmmm.” It is scared and alone and confused, fading from existence without the steady presence of its master. My heart bleeds for it and the pain I see in its eyes touches me deeply. If I were to be separated from Vespera I think I might look like that.

I still worry though. “How do you think you can help? I don’t think there’s anything to be done.”

“Did you know Lucifer means light-bringer?” He says. “Isn’t that something? The morning star. Grandpa is a fallen Seraphim, once a prince of heaven. I am a part of that heritage. All demons are.”

“Lucian, you are not an angel.”

“No, but I’m the other side of the same coin.”

“But you’re half human.”

He smiles with a strange kind of peace. “Yeah. I am.” I realize it is this side of himself he was drawing on to show mercy to the celestion. God damn I was so fucking proud of this kid. His bravery was inspiring. And purely on a selfish level, if this creature was an extension of the angel I had just slain perhaps saving her servant might be one small step toward redemption. After the deed I had committed back at the stream I was eager to do anything to help set things right.

Pocketing the collar I ask. “What can I do?”

His smile warms. “Stay with me.” He says. “If I can even do this it is going to take all the power I’ve got. I’ll be weak. I may pass out or…anyways.”

“Or die?”

He reaches up on his tip toes and kisses me on the lips. “I love you brother.”

“I love you too.” I take him by the head and stare him eye to eye. “Don’t you dare die! Dieing on me out here, that would be brattiest thing ever. You don’t want me to tell the others you died a brat, do you?”

He giggles and kisses me again. “I’ll do my best.”