It doesn't even matter!!

Shit

Fucking

God dammit

This game is shit. I can't make it past the first screen without Stab getting punched to **** by Jessica, Slice being shot to **** by Rudolf and/or Kyrie, or Squish falling into a hole that opens out of nowhere. Lambdaaaa! That's Gaap's thing, isn't it?! Why would Gaap be attacking the goats!?

"It's not Gaap, moron! It's Kinzo's secret trap doors! Kinzo's whooole mansion is full of super secret trap doors that he can activate whenever he wants!"

Aren't you supposed to be the one supporting Beatrice?! Why would you say it's trap doors and not Gaap?!

"Geeez, I just thought I'd throw the human side a bone for once! You know how happy Battler would be if he had some trap doors he could point at?"

How is this terrible game throwing humans a bone?! This is a crime against humanity! Apologize! Apologize to video game developers! I threw my controller down against the floor.

It exploded at my feet, killing me instantly. I don't get a clear condition for that one, in case you, like me, were hoping you would never see BATTLEGOATS again.