Iris and TIA continue to argue

According to Sergeant Mercer, we had six hours before reaching Kertha. I intended to spend at least five of them getting some sleep. I’d barely gotten comfortable when two familiar bickering voices filled the room.

“Move.”

“No.”

“TIA-919, I just ordered you to get out of my way.”

“It’s Iris, and no.”

I opened my eyes. So much for the nap.

My armor stood in its maintenance cradle across the room, freshly repaired and charging. TIA-442 hovered beside it in pearl-white light, diagnostic windows floating around her. Iris had positioned herself directly between TIA and the suit, her blue arms crossed.

“I am attempting to perform routine pre-deployment servicing,” TIA said.

“I already serviced him.” Iris insisted.

“Him?”

“The suit.”

“You said him.”

“I meant the suit.”

TIA’s eyebrow rose.

I sat up. “Can’t you two communicate telepathically or something?”

“No,” they answered simultaneously.

“Great.” I dropped back onto the pillow.

“The Private’s left shoulder actuator is operating three percent outside squad specifications.”

“I adjusted it.” Iris continued blocking TIA from my suit.

“Incorrectly.”

“For his preferred specifications.”

“Colonial standards exist for a reason.”

“Colonial specifications don’t know how he moves.”

“And you do?”

“Better than you.”

TIA went silent. Her pearl-white eyes shifted from Iris to me, then back again. “Oh.”

Iris narrowed hers. “What?”

“Nothing.” TIA abandoned the armor and approached my bunk.

“What are you doing?” Iris demanded. TIA didn’t respond.

“Private?” TIA’s voice switched into a more soothing pitch.

I sighed. “Yeah?”

“Would you prefer that I perform your armor maintenance?”

“I really don’t care. I just want to sleep before we land. It sounds like robots are going to be shooting at me as soon as we do.”

TIA’s hologram flickered. Then something hummed beneath the deck. Pearl-white light swept downward across her body, becoming steadily more opaque until her feet settled onto the floor with an actual tap.

I sat upright. Iris stared. TIA casually flexed her fingers. “Solid-state projection established.”

“You can do that ?”

“Of course, Private.”

She walked toward me. Actually walked. TIA sat on the edge of my bunk, the mattress dipping beneath her weight. Iris’s mouth fell open. TIA leaned against me, pressing herself snugly against my shoulder as she reached for the diagnostic brace on my wrist (standard Colonial equipment for remote access to your armor). This time there was no holographic illusion, I could feel her. Warm skin. Soft body. Real breasts pressing against me.

Iris looked murderous.

TIA smiled. “Is something wrong, Private?”

“No, I uh really appreciate your services.”

“Excellent.” She shifted closer while examining my wrist.

“Get off him,” Iris said.

TIA looked over her shoulder. “Why?”

“You’re supposed to be servicing his armor.”

“You prevented me from doing so.”

“You’re doing this deliberately.” Iris looked very annoyed by TIA’s actions.

“I am conducting a physical diagnostic on the private.”

“With your breasts?”

“My avatar has breasts, 919. Their presence is unavoidable.” TIA leaned a little harder against me. Iris’s glow intensified.

“Get your hands off him.” Silence. TIA slowly turned toward her. I slowly turned toward her. Iris froze.

TIA’s expression became positively wicked. “Fascinating.” She rested her head comfortably against my shoulder. No longer even pretending to be using my diagnostic brace. She wrapped her arms around my neck. “You know, 919, solid-state projection is remarkably energy intensive.”

“I am aware.”

“Of course you are.” Something about the way she said that made Iris go rigid. TIA continued sweetly, “Unfortunately, your projection system draws power directly from Private’s combat suit.”

Iris said nothing.

“At your suit’s current capacity, maintaining a physical avatar would exhaust its battery within minutes.”

“Your point?”

“My projection is currently connected to the transport’s primary power core.”

TIA slipped an arm down to my abs. “My available runtime is effectively unrestricted.”

Iris stared at her.

TIA smiled. “So, theoretically, I could stay like this with Private all night.”

“You wouldn’t.” Iris narrowed her eyes.

“Wouldn’t I?”

“You don’t even like him!”

TIA looked up at me. “The Private is physically healthy, psychologically sound, and surprisingly pleasant company.” Those all sounded like compliments to me.

“Don’t encourage her!” Iris read my mind.

TIA slid her hand further down, resting it on my thigh. “Besides, the Private doesn’t appear uncomfortable. His heart rate suggests he’s actually quite enjoying my touch. Would you like to touch me too, Private?” I wasn’t stupid enough to answer that in front of Iris.

Iris floated toward us until her face was inches from TIA’s. “He’s mine.”

TIA smiled. “You were assigned by mistake. I was instructed to tend to the Private’s needs.”She slid her hand onto my crotch. Iris was clenching her fists. That was a first.

I sat forward. “Hey.”

Both looked at me.