Mortal Kumbat

As the next Mortal Kombat tournament approaches, all the best fighters in the realms prepare to join the martial arts tournament to decide the fate of their respective realms.

And much like the olympics, these muscular, pumped up super-athletes are as horny as they are bloodthirsty.

You will on the role of a lowly servant on Shang Tsung’s island, who is there to serve drinks, light torches, and occasionally clean up blood and guts after a fight. There’s something about watching the magical and physical hand-to-hand fighting that just riles you up, and you’re making it your goal that at this tournament, you’re going to score with at least one of these kombatants.

Last night was the welcoming ceremony, and you got a good view of everyone who has arrived so far. There’s the buxom blonde badass, Sonya Blade, sitting with an arms-length on each side of her. She’s intimidating, and nobody so far wants to get too close. Then there’s Jade, a beautiful dark skinned woman who has a reputation for knowing how to work a pole. At the far end of the room is Sheeva, the giant Shokan woman who would stomp on you as soon as shake your hand, but either one would probably break your bones considering how strong she is.

Of course there’s many more ladies, and we can’t forget the gentlemen, all ripe for the picking and probably ready for a night of release before they potentially get brutally murdered the next day.

So get out there and bag yourself a kombatant!