In desperation, I try something I haven't done before: I attempt to appease Buxom by taking the initiative.

Leaving my phone with I-dont-know-his-name, I swish confidently and sexily down to the very front of the bus. After a brief consultation with the bus driver, he agrees (in exchange for a blowjob when he gets off shift) to allow me to be the official "concierge" of the vehicle for the remainder of its trip.

tbc