I do Sarah

I take Sarah’s file and ask to have her join me in the audition room for her interview. Unlike the interview rooms of most businesses, this one is set up as a mini-studio. It has cameras positioned in various places around the room that can be controlled remotely by the engineer in the adjacent room. It is furnished with a couple of sturdy armchairs and a sofa that can be pulled out and converted into a bed. A coffee table sits in front of the sofa. All of the furniture has been built to withstand far more wear and tear than your typical household furnishings. It goes without saying that it is all easy to clean and stain resistant, as well.

I introduce myself by my first name and ask Sarah to have a seat. After considering each piece of furniture, she chooses the sofa. I remember what Gretta said about Sarah seeming to be quite nervous and being on the verge of chickening out. If true, that would certainly be understandable. It would also be a shame. Her tight-fitting sweater did little to disguise the fact that she has some fine-looking tits to go with that sexy girl-next-door face. I decide to ask her a few easy questions to try to put her at ease.

“Why don’t we start with you telling me a bit about yourself?”

I’m not sure what I expected her to say. Perhaps she would tell me about where she grew up, what kind of family she comes from, or what sort of things she likes to do in her spare time. It was just supposed to be an ice-breaker question before I got into the personal and embarrassing stuff. Whatever I expected, it certainly wasn’t I got.

“I’ve had sex with 26 guys,” she says, just as matter-of-factly as if she was telling me how many shoes she has in her closet. “Over 50, if oral sex and handjobs count.” She looks at me with a questioning expression, as if I am supposed to confirm whether or not she should add a couple of dozen notches to her bedpost. I try to hide my surprise and say, “I see…”

Not my most brilliant moment as a conversationalist, I’ll admit. I just wasn’t expecting anyone this cute-but-wholesome looking to be so — dare I say it? Slutty.

She accepts my response as an indication for her to continue. “Full-on dick-in-vagina sex with all of the 26, and I did anal with four of them. I had three threesomes — one of them was with one guy and one other girl. I also did one foursome — all guys except me.”

She pulls an envelope out of her purse and offers it to me. “Here are five letters of reference. I can get more if you want.”

I open the envelope and glance through the letters. They are from five of Sarah’s 26 fuck buddies, each one attesting to the fact that they thoroughly enjoyed their romp between the sheets with my candidate. Well, technically, one of them never seems to have found his way between Sarah’s sheets or his own. His letter extols Sarah’s copulating competence from the seat of a John Deere tractor during the spring planting season. I make a mental note to talk to the Ideas Department about this. An agriculture-themed production could make good use of “plowing,” “drilling,” “planting,” “riding,” and, of course, plenty of “seed.”

I slip the letters into her file and desperately try to think of an appropriate follow-up question. Fortunately, Sarah keeps talking without any prompting from me.

“I’ve imagined being a big-named porn actress for years, but my parents insisted I go to college before making any decisions about my career. Even so, I’ve been practicing in front of the camera since my senior year of high school. I provided a link on my application where you can see my collection of videos.”

I am definitely surprised. “You staged your own porn scenes?”

She answers, “Well, not exactly. They’re mainly recordings of me having sex with boyfriends, but I do try to play to the camera while I’m doing it. Although, come to think of it, there is that video from last year’s Halloween party that could be a porn scene without too many modifications.”

I circle the link and promise her that I will personally check it out. That’s a promise I most certainly will not break.

She says, “So that’s about all you need to know about me, I guess.” She pulls her sweater off, revealing her sexy red see-through bra. She reaches behind and unfastens it. When she pulls it off and casts it aside, her large, firm breasts capture my full attention.

When I don’t say anything for a few moments, Sarah asks, “Isn’t this the point where you fuck me? Unless you have more questions, of course?”

Admittedly, I did expect that I’d get some kind of action while doing audition interviews, but I didn’t think it would happen this fast or in this way. The chance to be Sarah’s #27 — or #50-something, depending on how you classify blowjobs — would be a great way to remember my first day on the job. Still, all I did was ask two questions. Someone — probably Mom and Dad, even — will be watching this audition tape. It seems as if I should try to impress them with my interviewing skills