I Think It's Working

Bit by bit, while I ran through my speech, I watched the fire die down behind his eyes. It was little more than embers now, but ever the defiant prick he was he had to fight it a little more.

"Getting a date isn't going to solve all my problems, Emily," he practically spits out, "You might find all your happiness from others, but I've never needed anyone else to make me happy."

I ignore the little shot, the little implication that I'm just as fast and loose as Rachel, and instead I focus on the task at hand, "First of all, I'm pretty sure that you've never been happy once in your life. You can't know what'll make you feel happy if you've never actually felt that feeling before. Hell you can't know if you are capable of happiness in the first place if you've never felt it before, but I think you are capable of it and I think you can feel it and I never once said that Rachel is going to give that to you."

I sigh, reaching up to massage the bridge of my nose before dropping my hand and addressing him once more.

"Look I don't think there is some catch all solution to happiness. I certainly don't think that investing yourself in a relationship is the key to happiness. I don't have enough experience in things to say, but I've always been under the impression that you have to fix yourself in order to be a good partner. Going into a relationship expecting that they'll solve your problems for you is bound to cause nothing but troubles and heartache.

"And I am the last person in this world to advocate putting all your eggs in one basket. I don't even necessarily think that Rachel is in a place to be in a relationship, let alone that she's the right person for you. That's way too much emphasis on something that may not work out at all and it's definitely too much pressure for something that can be boiled down, at this point, to two conversations and mutual attraction."

"She's attracted to me?" he asks quietly, hopefully.

"Shut the fuck up and listen," I say, running all over him, "What I do know is this. I know you don't know how to talk to people. I know you think you're a loner, but you don't respond well to being alone. I know that you need practice in order to know how to open up to people. I know that Rachel is a good and kind and above all else patient person who has enough interest in you to likely overlook some of your more glaring faults. And I know that she's got enough of a spine to call you on your bullshit, just like I always should have, so that your worst habits don't overwhelm your meager benefits. Right now she, and me, are the best shot you have at friendship and maybe through us you can learn how to actually talk to people and maybe, just maybe, stand a chance at making a few more.

"Friends. Friendship. That's what you should be seeking out. Friendship that isn't one-sided and friendship where you don't bowl all over the other person and your worst faults don't dominate. Friendship where you're pulled out of your shell at least a little bit and are **** to contend with the fact that other people have something to offer.

"Maybe it turns into something else. With her, not with me. Maybe it doesn't and you wind up only getting a friend out of it but that's not a downside either. Because you'll have a friend out of it, and if I'm willing to bet then I'm willing to bet that Rachel is the kind of friend you want to keep for life. And if I'm willing to bet, which I am, I'm willing to bet that's the kind of friend you'll need."

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