I Can't Help Myself

Blushing, feeling like I’m being so blunt and so wanton and so very needy, I grasped the bottom of my shirt in my fingers and let out a slow exhale as I drew it up until it slid over and exposed my breasts to the open air. I left it sitting there, hovering just above my nipples and in spite of the sheet covering most of me I somehow felt so exposed.

Then my body shifted slightly and the sheet slid down, just enough that it caught for a minute and then fell away in a wave of rustling fabric. Then there was practically nothing hiding me at all.

Her breasts, my breasts, were larger than you'd think at first glance. Or maybe it was just that I was so small and slim and petite that it made them seem larger? That could explain it.

Either way I knew they were more than a handful, that if a man were to grab them in full they would spill out over the edges of his grip and if I was to lie on my back they would billow out to the sides of me, spilling over with soft swells.

Yet in spite of their size they did defy gravity. It might have just been youth but something about the sheer perkiness of them, the way my puffy nipples turned up at the edges of them and formed a perfect curve underneath, I thought that it was likely more down to genetics. That Emily Ross was just gifted in that respect.

I didn't know that feeling. I'd never had that feeling. Or I guess I had because I was her and she was me and it was all just chance and happenstance that had led me to be a man instead of... her.

Right?

So maybe there was something to that. I didn't have the first clue about how genetics worked so maybe, male or female, all this was in my code. And all it took was two X chromosomes to bring it out in me but it was there all along and if I'd had the chance I could have... I could have looked this beautiful.

This shockingly beautiful. Flush and wide eyed and melting by the moment. Breasts full and perky and waist slim and tiny and tummy flat, hips a flare out at the bottom just where the sheet had puddled and it had kept the rest of me hidden including my quivering thighs which were shifting and moving beneath the sheets, nervous energy in my body as I thought about what it was that my plans for the day were and what it was that I truly wanted here.

And now.

And her.

My hands twitch and I run a thumb across my cheek and over my lips and then my lips close on it and I draw it in and I moan lightly, my eyelids fluttering as I remember Blake doing that to me in the dark. Making me suck but was it making me if I wanted to do it? If I wanted to do so much more.

God I'd gotten so much done to me but I had done so very little. Rachel had teased and kissed me and Blake had pressed into me. Lucas had dipped his lips between my thighs and tasted me and god I was eager to touch and taste and feel myself.

I couldn't deny it, no matter how much I might want to because I wanted to feel more than I wanted to deny. I wanted to know the pleasure of it and somehow and some way I couldn't help but feel like I had.

Somehow. Some inconsistent way that pressed at the edges of me and made me shake my head to try to clear away cobwebs and yet it felt like it was just out of reach and I got the sense why in a grumbling voice telling me that I wasn't ready.

Wasn't ready for what? I didn't know. But I knew what I was ready for right now.

Sucking on my thumb with my lips while my other hand moved down and over my breasts and squeezed them. Finding my puffy nipple as it started to stiffen and pinching just enough to let out a sight of pleasure from me before pushing down over my flat tummy and between my thighs that were aching and begging for even more.

Begging me. Begging me.

Begging me not to stop.

And I wouldn't and I couldn't and I would never dream of it. As my fingers crested the sheets and teased them away from my body and I pressed that little bit further, falling back just enough that I was leaned up against the pillows behind me and my back was arched, pressing my breasts up a little bit more.

As I stared into the mirror and saw the bright red of my heat blossom beneath my skin and I saw my eyes twinkle with mischevious delight before falling into the glassiness of my pleasurable need.

I knew that I wouldn't stop.

I knew that I couldn't deny myself the pleasure of me.

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