How to treat women who are not normal human beings?

"Speaking of differences." Martin looked puzzled towards Tim.

"You know breasts or hooters, tits, milk-jugs, mammary banks." completing this explanation with a few movements of the hands possibly describing the shape and size differences that these synonyms might otherwise entail on the female form. Martin nodded in understanding.

"You mentioned, and I quote, '... treating them as normal human beings...' which is all fine and dandy if Walter... We can't call you Walter or Dad - you are too much eye candy for that. " His face that had hitherto been serious in the manner of the boring drunk or tripping stoner suddenly lit up. "Candy! That's it let's name her Candy! Eye-Candy? You get it."

The two boys high-fived each other rolling around laughing. Walter cleared his throat to silence them but unlike his voice that was unchanged the throat was delicate, thin and feminine uttering something closer to a husky sigh than the disapproving growl he intended.

"Anyway, as I was saying Candy here is not a normal human being like other women. She is some kind of shape-changer you know, vampire like thing." He raised his arms and bent his elbows in a crook imitating a classic vampire pose. "So as a not-normal human being we don't need to treat Candy like one. Right?"

"Yeah man, totally. So?"

Tim turned to Candy - no longer seeing Walter before him but simply a blonde chick in hot-pants that came to his room.

"Show us your tits Candy - you are among the guys here - we all like to see a nice pair of hooters. Don't we? No Ma'am - we love it. So take that stupid shirt of - we know you don't have a bra.

Walter was frozen by the sudden lewd turn that things had taken.