Hiroko, 35 Years Old, Head of Science

Hiroko scratches her head as she reads the number on the card in front of her.

Was it really that much?

"Something the matter?" Rika, her colleague, presumably having seen her frowning expression, asks her.

They are sitting in the staff room, alone, each with a morning cup of coffee.

"Yeah, you could say that." Hiroko replies dryly.

"Anything I can help with?" Rika offers gently.

"Unless you have a spare heap of cash lying around, or can forge some very convincing receipts, probably not." Hiroko sighs.

Rika frowns. "Hiroko, what have you done? This sounds serious. You haven't... you didn't... spend science department money on personal bills, did you?!"

"Maybe a little." Hiroko says lightly.

She places the card onto the table, and gently slides it towards her colleague.

"A little?! It looks like you blew through half the month's budget!"

"It's the first ever month of a brand new academy. They already had all the cupboads fully stocked. They won't miss it! And even if they do, whatever. I'm sure it'll all be resolved amicably in the end."

"Hiroko, how can you be so sure? Have you heard none of the rumors?! Seen any of the little warning signs that..."

"That what?"

"That something isn't quite right here. That the board of directors have some... I don't know... dark desires for this place."

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Okay, well firstly, you have noticed that every single staff member is a woman, right? And the board of directors is all men."

"Typical male brain. Can't help but hire attractive women whenever possible. Gross, but not sinister."

"What about the headmistress? She always seems so... cold. Almost... malicious. And what she said this morning, about us needing to be harsher to the female students and more lenient on the boys... What sort of crazy directive is that?!"

Hiroko snorts. "Oh yeah, her. Yeah, I don't like her one bit. And you best believe I won't be indulging that sexist request. In fact... I have a personal favourite way of dealing with sexists." She leans in close and changes her voice to a whisper. "Fart bombs."

"You what?" Rika asks, confused.

"Farts are the best way to **** someone, without leaving evidence. Did you know that one of the air vents in the 2nd floor corridor channels air directly into the Headmistress's office? Every single time I've needed to fart for the last few weeks, I've been making a short trip down the corridor to a certain vent. And, I've been adding a lot of eggs to my diet."

"You need to take this more seriously." Rika warns her. "I don't think we've yet seen quite what our new employers are capable of."

Hiroko scoffs. "You mean like what that bitch said on the first day? 'If you are a Stanzi Academy Star on the inside, we will turn you into a Stanzi Academy Star on the outside.' Then what was the next bit?"

"'I'm not going to repeat it." Rika says quietly.

"It's just a whole load of bullshit intended to keep us from making a stand against sexism." Hiroko explains confidently.