Happy fun bunch

The next morning began with pain.

Not the life-threatening kind.

The educational kind.

Joey lay flat on his back in the training yard behind the manor, staring at the gray morning sky while trying to remember how breathing worked.

Greta loomed over him with her enormous arms folded.

"You know," she said thoughtfully, "most people try not to get hit by the practice hammer."

Joey groaned.

"I was attempting a highly advanced tactical maneuver."

"Oh?"

"Falling down before you could hit me harder."

Greta nodded approvingly.

"...That's actually not the worst strategy I've heard."

Across the yard, Crystal burst into laughter.

Cassandra rolled her eyes.

"You are encouraging him."

"I reward creativity," Greta replied.

"You reward property damage."

"Also true."

The fortified manor had more than enough room for training.

Behind the house stretched nearly five acres enclosed by stone walls, reinforced steel fencing, and magical wards that Elias had spent three days carving into every surface that would sit still long enough.

Harold's voice drifted pleasantly from hidden speakers.

"Good morning. Today's projected survival probability has increased by three percent."

Joey looked up.

"...That sounds encouraging."

"It is. Yesterday it decreased by nine percent."

"...Less encouraging."

Valerie stretched lazily, rolling one shoulder.

"So who's first?"

"I volunteer Joey," Crystal said immediately.

"I object," Joey answered.

"Objection denied."

Valerie grinned.

"Come on, Burger Boy."

"I'm beginning to hate that nickname."

"Liar."

She tossed him a padded practice knife.

"Show me what Cassandra's been teaching you."

Joey settled into a stance.

Not perfect.

But much better than it had been a month ago.

His shoulders stayed relaxed.

Weight balanced.

Eyes moving instead of locking onto a single target.

Valerie circled him.

"Good."

She disappeared.

Not literally.

Just frighteningly fast.

Joey felt movement behind him.

Instead of spinning wildly like he would have weeks ago—

he stepped sideways.

A wooden training blade sliced through empty air where he'd been standing.

Valerie's eyebrows climbed.

"There you go."

Joey smiled.

"I finally stopped panicking."

"You started thinking."

They traded blows.

Fast.

Controlled.

Joey lost more exchanges than he won, but every mistake became smaller.

Every correction came quicker.

Then Valerie suddenly feinted high before sweeping low.

Joey stumbled—

but instead of trying to recover immediately, he let himself fall.

He rolled across the ground, came up on one knee, and drew the cursed machete in one smooth motion.

The weapon shrieked.

"FINALLY! SOMEONE VIOLENT!"

Valerie laughed so hard she nearly dropped her weapon.

"I love that stupid sword."

"It has confidence issues," Joey muttered.

"I HAVE EXCELLENT SELF-ESTEEM!"

Greta scratched her chin.

"I think it might actually."

Nearby, Cassandra and Taylor trained with Malcolm.

Which mostly consisted of Malcolm trying very hard to hit either of them.

And failing spectacularly.

Taylor flowed through the air with almost supernatural grace.

She barely seemed to touch the ground.

Every movement reminded Joey of a bird gliding on invisible currents.

Cassandra, meanwhile, fought like darkness itself.

She vanished into shadows.

Appeared somewhere impossible.

Countered every strike before Malcolm had fully committed.

Even Malcolm smiled.

"You've improved," he told Taylor.

She blinked.

"...Really?"

"You stopped apologizing every time you hit me."

Taylor smiled shyly.

"I was raised to be polite."

Greta barked a laugh loud enough to scare birds from nearby trees.

"You're learning."

After a short break, Elias took over.

Which everyone secretly dreaded.

Not because he wasn't skilled.

Because his explanations never ended.

"Combat," he announced dramatically, "is fundamentally an exercise in geometry."

Crystal looked exhausted already.

"...Here we go."

"Observe!"

He drew six intersecting circles in the dirt.

Then another four.

Then several triangles.

Joey frowned.

"Is that... a battle plan?"

"No."

"A spell?"

"No."

"What is it?"

"The optimal route to the coffee machine while avoiding cursed floor tiles."

Greta nodded.

"Useful."

"It is useful!" Elias insisted.

Crystal whispered to Joey.

"I have absolutely no idea if he's a genius."

"I don't think he knows either."

By early afternoon everyone had gathered beneath the covered patio.

Water bottles.

Bruises.

Sore muscles.

Harold politely informed everyone that hydration was recommended.

Even Cassandra accepted a bottle.

Joey noticed.

"You've gotten better."

She looked toward him.

"At what?"

"Being around everyone."

Cassandra followed his gaze.

Taylor laughing with Crystal.

Greta loudly arguing with Valerie about whether punching a werewolf counted as cardio.

Malcolm quietly eating enough food for four people.

Elias trying to explain magical aerodynamics to absolutely no one.

A faint smile crossed Cassandra's face.

"...I suppose I have."

"You've got a family now," Joey said softly.

The words surprised even him.

They also surprised Cassandra.

For a long moment she simply looked at him.

Then, without saying anything, she reached over and intertwined her fingers with his.

Taylor noticed from across the patio.

Instead of looking jealous...

she smiled.

Then walked over and slipped comfortably against Joey's other side.

"You know," she said, "this is probably the strangest family in existence."

Crystal called over immediately.

"I object."

"Why?"

"We're forgetting Harold."

"Thank you, Crystal."

Greta raised an eyebrow.

"I thought artificial intelligences couldn't feel appreciated."

"I am making an exception."

Laughter rippled across the group.

For a little while...

the coming war didn't feel so close.

As evening settled over the estate, Malcolm quietly approached Greta.

His expression had grown serious.

"I found tracks."

Greta's smile disappeared instantly.

"How many?"

"Four."

"Close?"

"They were watching."

Greta looked toward the manor where Joey, Cassandra, Taylor, and Crystal stood together talking beneath the porch lights.

"They're getting bolder."

Malcolm nodded once.

"They're learning."

Greta's jaw tightened.

"So are we."

Neither of them noticed the pair of golden reptilian eyes watching the estate from nearly a mile away through enchanted binoculars.

The scout smiled.

Then silently disappeared into the darkness to report back to Leviathan.

The war was coming

It simply hadn't announced its arrival yet.