Gotham's new defensor

-Yahoooooo!!!-

Harley was back in the wild blue yonder, but this time, it was a whole different ride from floatin' on the streets. The wind whooshing past her, her lungs burning with each scream, and her hair doing a wild dance behind her like it had a mind of its own—it was a thrill. She dove into a cloud bank, relishing the cool tickle on her skin, then popped back out above them, catching her breath.

-Woah! Never thought I'd pull that off!- She chuckled, peeping down at the city, now lookin' more like a map on a screen than the real deal.

-All thanks to this fantastic new bod of mine. Mmm...- She gave herself another once-over, giggling at the snug Amazonian getup she was sporting. A bit tight, huh? Not that she minded; if anything...

-Let's see what we got here...- She playfully gave her borrowed chest a squeeze. Lucky for her, Wonder Woman had picked a flexible costume over rigid armor that day; but, of course, Harley wanted the real thing. Lowering her neckline, she let the twins out for some fresh air.

-No bra, Diana? Quite daring. Then you won't mind if I do... this... ohhh...- She closed her eyes, letting out a moan as her fingers tweaked and twirled the two little peaks, and then she gave the soft goodness a proper fondle.

-Always wanted to get my mitts on these, and now I got 'em! Oh, they're definitely bigger than mine... but no sense being envious, right? Eheheh, could do this all d- She stopped as she heard a noise from above. Lookin up, a plane was passing over her head.

A naughty grin played on her lips. She quickly tucked her goodies back into the costume and sped up to reach the plane.

"Let's see if I can match its speed!".

Turns out, she could. Flying next to it, fists thrust forward in superhero style, she noticed a teen guy staring at her from a porthole in pure amazement. You know, seeing one of your favorite superheroes flying alongside your plane wasn't an everyday occurrence. The guy didn't know it yet, but his day was about to get even better.

Instead of giving him a military salute like the real Wonder Woman would, Harley opted for something more... memorable. Grabbing her neckline, she flashed her assets, making a goofy face that was out of character for the Princess of Themyscira. She saw the boy chortling, eyes nearly popping out of his sockets, and then quickly turned around, probably to tell the person next to him.

Well, Harley didn't intend to tarnish Wonder Woman's rep like this, so she flew away before he could notice. But not before stopping halfway through and doubling over with laughter.

-Oh my God, that was hilarious! They'll never believe him when he tells people! Ahahah!!!-

Wiping away a tear from her eye, she eventually calmed down. Foolin' around was funny, but since she was a hero, duty came first. She descended just enough to get a detailed view of the city, standing still with her arms crossed and a smug grin. From above, Gotham could almost pass for a normal, relatively quiet city... but Harley knew best. So, she started lookin' for trouble.

-Dang, I wish I had Supes' super-vision right now. Mmm, maybe I should possess him next... nah, I won't trade a princess for some jour... but look at that!- A group of masked individuals exited a bank with bags full of money, heading towards black minivans.

-Oh geez, my first money heist! This is gonna be a hoot!- She dove down towards the criminals, landing with a thud between two of them and socking one in the face with one of her armlets.

-Cease your misguided endeavors, as I have...- She felt something sticky and humid on her hand. Glancing down, she saw it covered in blood, and also that the man on the ground had lost his jaw.

-Right, superstrength.-.

-That's Wonder Woman!- Another crook hollered: -Fire!!!-. The heist crew aimed their rifles and let 'em rip. Harley cracked open her eyes, then something clicked inside of her, and she started swinging her arms at breakneck speed, deflecting every bullet with her bracelets.

When the gunfire ceased, Harley found herself without a scratch, an adrenalinic smile tingling on her lips.

-Awesome. My turn, boys!- She leaped, spinning mid-air; usually, she'd need a few more acrobatics to close the gap, but with Diana's body, she covered the distance in a jiffy.

-Y-ah! Take this! And you this!- She punched one in the stomach, hopped onto another and headbutted him, and snared a third thug with the lasso, yanking him towards her; then, she smacked his noggin into a fourth villain's, knocking them out.

Only two were left.

-Well, what's your move now?- She taunted. One dropped his piece, throwing up his hands and shaking his head like he was tryin' to dodge a swarm of bees. The other pretended to surrender, but then whipped out a gun and fired. The bullet tinkled against Harley's defenses, bouncing straight into the first guy's foot, who started hopping around and yowling.

-Oh shoosh, sorry!- Harley squealed. The other crook tried to make a run for it, but she looped him up with her lasso and reeled him in.

-Eat the asphalt!- Harley barked, slamming him down with a suplex. When she let him go, he unceremoniously crumbled to the ground.

As she straightened back, beaming in satisfaction, she heard some clapping that made her turn around. Applause and cheers were from the bystanders on the crosswalk—men, women, and even some ankle-biters joining in. Her surprise turned into euphory as she waved back her hand.

-Thank you, thank... aaerm, thank you!- She switched to the other hand, the one not stained with blood, and led Diana's instinct to kick in for the big speech: -I'm grateful for your support, citizens! Together, we stand against injustice, and your applause is a testament to the strength found in unity and the triumph of righteousness!-

"Ok, what the heck did I just blabber?". Anyway, she decided to skedaddle before the police showed up, so she soared back into the sky. Once out of sight, she let out a gleeful squeak.

-Oh my God! I can't believe that, they were clapping at me! Just because I stopped those morons without killing anyone! I mean, I think that pal is still alive. Being a superhero is amazing!!!-

She resumed her city patrol, an eagle on the hunt, until her attention was grabbed by a cluster of police cars surrounding a house, along with someone hollering into a megaphone - a negotiator, clearly. Figuring it was worth a peek, she gracefully touched down between them. A giggle bubbled up as the cops looked up at her, muttering incredulous Wonder Woman's name.

That was gold! Her, getting idolized by the police! Who'd have thunk it?

-It's over, release the girl! The building is cornered!- The negotiator, none other than Commissioner Gordon, was the sole one who hadn't noticed her yet. She tapped his shoulder with a grin. Gordon spun around in surprise, ready to throw some shade at the interrupter, but, boy, was he flabbergasted when he found himself face-to-face with Wonder Woman.

-Good morning, commissioner. Any problems, puddin'?- Harley quipped, barely holding back her laughter.

-Ah, yes, y-you arrived just in time, Miss Woman... Wonder Woman... I mean, erm, Victor Zsasz is keeping a young lady as a hostage, and he refuses to surrender. We are in a shortage of men because of that giant woman...- Gordon stammered.

Harley's smirk faded for a moment. Zsasz; that nutjob made Joker look like a choir boy.

-Don't sweat, commissioner: I, Wonder Woman, will tidy up this mess!- She sauntered away for a few steps, snickering at the effect she had on one of the men itching to nab her, but then she reined in her amusement.

"Alright, Harley, time to get serious! A life's on the line, and I can't afford any oopsies."

She addressed the commissioner again, asking if they had eyes on the room. He confirmed they did—managed to sneak a hidden camera in with a drone. Harley got an idea and gave the cops instructions, then she hovered in the air.

Inside the building, the infamous serial killer was squeezing the life out of the poor girl, a knife threatening her jugular.

-Don't fret, soon you will be free...- He hissed.

-No! Please, please, let me go, I don't want to die!!!- She pleaded, but her cries fell on deaf ears. Suddenly, Gordon's voice rang out again.

-You're leaving us ****, Zsasz! We're throwing smoke bombs in ten!-.

-Heh, I don't think so. She will be dead before they get me.- He muttered, indifferent to his hostage's shrieks. However, he shuffled back from the window, not wanting to be hit on the head by a grenade.

-Don't you see? Life is meaningless, and I will free you from- He never got to finish the sentence since, as his back met the wall, a fist karate-chopped its way through, connecting with the back of his head. He dropped to the floor, moaning, while Harley majestically entered the room, literally shattering the wall by stepping over it, and cradled the frightened girl in her arms.

-Oh my God, oh my God! Thank you, you saved me!- She wailed, clutching to her chest.

-No need to thank, darlin'. My, you're a cutie...- She purred, but right then, Zsasz groaned again, making the girl yell in fear.

-Hey, wanna hear somethin' hilarious?- Harley suggested, letting her go and lassoing the psycho. Zsasz was **** to kneel, a wince on his face, while the young lady was mighty confused.

-The Lasso of Truth compels you, Victor! Now reveal to me... an embarrassing secret about yourself.-.

The lasso glowed, and Zsasz growled, trying to resist, in vain.

-The first time... I killed a man... I puked, and...- He bit his tongue to stop. Harley cocked an eyebrow and gave a jerk.

-And?-.

-And the guy wasn't dead, and he puked on me too!- He blurted out, his face turning a shade of purple. Harley burst into laughter, picturing the scene, but then noticed that the girl wasn't laughing at all; in fact, she still looked pretty darn terrified.

"Well... let's try with slapstick." She gave another tug, this time making him stand up and whirl around. Then, she kicked him right square in his family jewels, causing him to take off and hit his head on the ceiling before falling senseless to the ground. This time, the girl snorted, and Harley with her too.

-Heh! That was nice, but let's get you outta here.-.

Minutes later, Harley was once again floating between the clouds, a satisfied smirk plastered on her face. She mused on how the cops gawked at her when she brought back the woman safely, how Gordon nervously shook her hand, completely smitten by Wonder Woman's charismatic presence.

-I really, really could get used to it.- She declared. Being in Diana's bod was simply fantastic - empowering, to put it better - and even if she planned to switch into someone else eventually, right now, she didn't feel any rush. If she could pull the wool over Batman and Gordon's eyes, heck, who could unmask her?

She peered down at Gotham, this time with the citizens cheering her from the streets. Up to them, she wasn't the former girlfriend of the most wanted criminal in the city, but a founder member of the Justice League looking over them. Then, her eyes locked on a certain someone, some black young guy with a beret, who started making tracks as soon as he spotted her. Mmm... fishy, right? She trailed him with her gaze; he sauntered into an apparently nondescript building, but Harley perfectly knew who owned it.

"Well, well, well...".

She zipped around the place, peeking in from the windows, until she spotted exactly who she suspected: a short, goofy-looking man who was chewing out the shaken guy for spooking over nothing. She abruptly barged in with an explosion of glass shards, leaving the two momentarily flabbergasted.

-Hey there, Cobbie, what are we up to?- She asked, not even bothering to stay in character.

-What? Stay away! You can't prove I'm doing anything!- Oswald Cobblepot, aka the Penguin, snapped angrily in his nasal voice. Harley eyed beret-boy, who immediately bolted out of the room in panic.

-Mmm. I guess you're right, Cobbie. But guess what?-.

With a swift motion, she threw her rope at him, lassoing him around the waist.

-I don't care!-.

She gave a tug and, as soon as he was within reach, landed a punch square in his face. Cobblepot theatrically rolled to the ground, leaving behind a trail of teeth and blood, until he collided with the wall.

Harley casually stashed away the lasso: -Serves you right for skippin' my birthday bash. Catch ya later, Oswie, be a good bird!- and she flew off, leaving an agonizing Penguin to ponder when he ever got an invite from Wonder Woman.