Gaia Date 2, Part 3: Riding an Intermission

Andromeda

Tyalangan sits at at a two-top bar table, a whiskey glass with some dark amber liquid on hand. She is checking a tablet, not particularly watching the door. A couple of guards stand on either side of the table; they are the ones that notice Andromeda coming in. They tense up as she approaches.

“Gentlemen, she’s my appointment tonight. Let her through.”

“Not the warmest greeting I have ever received,” the arcanist android states, scooting to sit across from the Queen.

“Apologies. My days are long, even without the show. Sometimes, I run out of courtesy towards the end. Also, the court insist that I act like I need protection. Though the extra eyes ARE appreciated, gentlemen. You want a drink?”

“Not particularly,” Andromeda replies, “What’s your poison, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Mushroom Wine. Closest thing I can get to scotch here. We just doing your quest or did you want to chat first?”

Andromeda pulls out her deck. It seemed to work well in Winter’s format. She starts to shuffle, noting, “Since we are supposed to chat during the game, let’s see if the conversation lasts beyond it. Same rules as Winter proposed?”

The Host nods and shuffles. “Fair. Question: the deck’s usual deity or the souped up custom version?”

Oh? Interesting... “Explain.”

“Each staff member has a custom deity designed after themselves they can swap out for their deck. Same flavor as the usual one, just tougher to deal with. Outside of my bonny bunny, beating it gives a bonus reward.”

“And if I fail?”

“You can try next round.”

Andromeda shrugs, “Let’s see how bad it is.”

The card is manifested. Tyalangan lets her read as she shuffles.

Tyalangan, Bladesinger 1WU

Legendary Creature – Elf Demigod Wizard

When Tyalangan, Bladesinger enters the battlefield, if she was cast, exile up to X target instant cards from your graveyard, where X is equal to the converted mana cost of Tyalangan on cast. Put a cheat counter on each of them.

Whenever Tyalangan attacks, copy each exiled card with a cheat counter on it. You may cast the copies.

Double Strike. Ward – Pay life equal to the converted mana cost of the spell

1/3

That... looks powerful. “I’ll give it a shot.”

“You can have the start.”

Two mana ramp spell, plus enough leylines to cast it. Decent selection of morph creatures. This is keepable. Andromeda plays her land and asks, “I assume you know why I asked to talk?”

“Relationship talk. What do you want to know?”

Andromeda thinks as they play through their early turns. She had to fetch-shock herself on Turn 3, but she manages to get her deity out early. As she moves to cast her first free morph, the Host bounces her deity back to hand. The Lotus Field leyline was also unexpected. Hmm... what is she up to, exactly?

“So, how do you navigate the harem relationship when you are so introverted? Winter said you were, but I find it hard to believe.”

Tyalangan casts a bunch of main phase instants to dig for a leyline. The one she found comes into play tapped. “It’s about knowing yourself and your limits. You will have an easier time of it than I do. My position is different than yours.”

Andromeda plays a Trail of Mystery, then adds another morph creature to the field. She swings out. “Why do you think I will have an easy time?”

The sea elf tutors for a Path of Exile and misses a leyline drop. “I assume you got me, but we’ll play it out. Simple. When you are drained, you can step aside and another of Mona’s companions can cover for you. I have no such luxury. When mine need me, I can’t deny them, even if I had a socially exhausting day.”

Flipping the Coliseum Exterminator did the trick. Moving on to game two. No two mana ramp, but four leylines in hand? A slower hand, but a keepable one. “So, you just suffer through it?”

The early turns of Game 2 are much the same. Andromeda got to see that assassin and chromeshell crab card that won her the match last time. But, Tyalangan swept the board.

“I would not call having a dozen or so loves in my life suffering, but I do my duties and I love them. I do get some recharge time, mostly when I rest my lungs in the early morning. Your go.”

She’s trying her best to keep my board clear. Smart. The Naga-tribe Elder lets me get my deity out next turn. She just bounced that, then cast her deity from her hand. Next turn, she can start repeat casting those two instants...

“So, find time for myself? That’s it for advice? What about when I need to socialize?”

Tyalangan starts swinging, bouncing potential blockers and giving her deity protection from green. She tutors for a storm pump card. She wins when Andromeda missed the storm count, thinking she could take at least one more hit when she was at 12 life.

Onto game three. Another turn three deity play hand.

She keeps and starts. She once again has a strong start. By turn 4, her deity is out with multiple morph creatures. Her Skyshroud Claim whiffed, as she only had one green typed leyline left. Then, her deity got knocked out by a combat trick. Frustrating...

“You aren’t broken, Andromeda. You are socializing with me perfectly fine. Common interests help. Spirit Watching Bird?”

Not swinging out right now. Recast the deity.

“Well, we are playing a game. It helps, sure, but... Pass.”

“No buts, take a bird hit, then think. If you have a social interaction problem, it is one of a too narrow interest, if anything.”

Wilderness Reclamation. Putrefy the Knight. Swing out. She’s down to eight. And there is the board wipe, Single Combat? Huh. Keep my deity, I guess?

“So, I should take a greater interest in what Mona likes?”

Her next turn led Andromeda to cast Leyline of Anticipation (so she can start recovering during Tyalangan’s end step, when the ban on casting creatures is over), only for her to overload a Cyc Rift.

“You should keep an open mind and try the things any of them like.”

Andromeda spends her turn rebuilding, playing Wilderness Reclamation, her deity, a free morph creature, and a planeswalker that grants her creatures flash. As expected, Tyalangan plays her deity, exiling the cyc rift. Oh. That can’t stay.

On her end step, Andromeda Reality Shifts the deity (2 life isn’t that bad of an extra cost), and then empties her hand of creatures. One last swing out, and she wins, 2-1.

Andromeda: Minor Quest Update! Record 2-0.

Andromeda: Force Spike spell scroll (Quest Reward)

The Host is gracious in defeat, “Good game. Think I always play suboptimally now?”

“You had me on the ropes. So, what kinds of things should I first try with them?”

The Host sips the last of her drink, then motions to the bar for another. They talk for a bit more until the Host gets called away to deal with a show emergency. It was easier to socialize while playing than I thought. I need to try and have some fun with the others on their terms, not just on mine.

Kevin

The trail terminates at the base of a very large clearing. Henge stones encircle a desecrated altar. Just on the inside of the stones, a bunch of plant people(?) are erotically dancing. In the middle, around the altar, two more of those dark haired orc spellcasters are jerking off towards the ritual site, chanting in a language he doesn’t recognize. “Ghâsh-nakh thrak-uruk! Ghâsh-nakh thrak-uruk! Ghâsh-nakh thrak-uruk!”

Ootah does, though. “They are try to summon a servant of Talos. A dark celestial thunder boar. That would be bad.”

“So, how do we interrupt them?”

“Keep them from cumming, then hope Auntie Daphne isn’t acting like Talos is already paying attention?”

The distance is too wide to get to the orcs in a single round of combat, so Winter, mostly topped up on HP, rushes towards a plant guy; the drow doesn’t get a one hit kill, which is not a great start. Tegan actually casts a spell; her first arrow glows with fire as she hits a different plant person right in the chest. Her other arrow flies wide. Mineko, only about half healed (the nekomata insisted on only spending SP to heal Winter), rushes and casts a spell at the druids. A loud boom erupts, shattering the altar and dealing considerable damage to the orcs; they hustle behind a stone hedge to get out of the way, casting something as they move. Ootah, shouting a battlecry, radiates a cold mist as she chops down the first plant person in two massive chops.

My turn. Kevin activates Peerless Athlete, then moves forward. The plant person he targets first, the last one close enough to reach on the far right side (by his perspective), still stands despite the head being lopped off, but the second strike drops it. The other plants move forward, one able to get to Kevin in time; vines erupt from the ground around him, trying to grab hold of him. Kevin is not entirely successful in avoiding getting grabbed, but he wasn’t planning on moving forward before this new foe is dead. Need to preserve the line as best I can.

He gives the others a glance in his peripheral vision. Winter drops one of the two plant people around him. Tegan fires off another couple arrows, one aflame with magic, neither delivered particularly well. Mineko telegraphs her attack, which is probably ill-advised; her plant person target is still up.

Then the foes get their turn. Two giant blasts of lightning erupts from the orcs. One hits Kevin square in the chest. It feels like everything is on fire as all of his muscles contract, hard. He exhales some soot.

A brief peek towards Ootah shows the orc grow like she did this afternoon. She smashes the plant in front of her with a single blow, then charges towards another, splitting it in half. Kevin slices down the plant immediately in front of him, then charges forward, summoning divine energy into his second blow. Okay; most of the plants are dead. We need to push to get to those orcs. I don’t think half of us could survive another blast of lightning like that. The few plant people left are ineffective at hurting them, but are still serving their combat role of buying the orcs time.

Winter skewers one of the few plant people still up, letting it fall in a heap. Tegan fires off a couple of arrows at one of the dark haired orcs, that are moving forward. They must be out of ranged spells. Mineko shouts out “KITTTTTTTEEEEEEH PAUUUUUUNCH!!!!!!!!!!!” as she finally ends a minion. The orcs attempt to fire off thunderwaves. The one by Mineko and Ootah fails to cast it properly. The one by Kevin’s is weak; he barely feels it shake his armor. Ootah smirks, then cuts down the last of the plant people and the orc. He cuts down the other.

Sighing, Kevin leans forward to catch his breath. Tegan is yelling about something, but the hu-cow can’t see her. When he turns around, he sees the commotion: Mineko is shouting and punching the snout of a boar the size of a semitruck. That is one big pig. Kevin covers the distance, slashing into the giant boar’s side. Then, the boar strikes. Mineko is knocked into the air, then slammed into the ground. She doesn’t get back up.

“Mineko!”

Kevin sees Winter stab into the boar’s other flank as he rushes to help the poor nekomata. He hears the pig squeal after Tegan fires an arrow up in the air; it shatters into what looks like a million shards, peppering the boar’s back. Another arrow follows, grazing the boar’s ear. Ootah stomps over, axe swinging; the boar slams into the ground, then gets back up. Kevin dumps most of his “lay on hands” points into the nekomata, then casts a spell, clanging sword into shield, “I’m your foe, you disgusting son of a bitch. Leave Mineko alone!”

The boar’s eyes light up with rage. The boar’s tusk swipes into Kevin hard, pushing him away from the still prone cat. The subsequent foreleg into the gut was helpfully off-center. Kevin spits out a glob of blood. The fanfare plays as Winter delivers one final blow.

Kevin: +3 XP (Killed 6 level 1 monsters, x0.2 penalty [overleveled], Killed 1 level 3 monster, x0.6 penalty, [overleveled])

Kevin: Weekly Bounty Complete! Complete a Delve +20 BP

Mineko: +1 XP (Killed 1 level 1 monster [threshold for XP not met, have a pity point])

Mineko: Weekly Bounty Complete! Complete a Delve +20 BP

Mineko: Daily Task Complete! Show Off Your Collar +10 BP

Mona: Weekly Bounty Update – Ensure that each contestant successfully completes a delve (7/10)

Ootah: +5 XP (Killed 7 level 1 monsters, x0.2 penalty [overleveled], Killed 2 level 3 monster, x0.6 penalty, [overleveled])

Tegan: +2 XP (Killed 2 level 1 monsters, x0.2 penalty [overleveled], Killed 1 level 3 monster, x0.6 penalty, [overleveled], all rounded down at the end)

Tegan: Weekly Bounty Complete! Complete a Delve +20 BP

Winter: +7 XP (Killed 4 level 1 monsters, x0.2 penalty [overleveled], rounded up, Killed 1 level 6 monster)

Winter: Weekly Bounty Complete! Complete a Delve +20 BP

Now, Kevin collapses onto his butt. His ribs hurt. “You okay, Mineko?”

The cat crawls over to Kevin and presses a paw into his goring wound. He feels the wound start to knit together as the nekomata shudders in orgasm. Kevin sighs and lays back. Okay, we all survived. I’ll call that a win.

Winter

The wrap up was simple enough. While the injured take another rest, Ootah and Tegan scour the area for loot. A fancy looking rapier popped out of the dead boar, which the recovering Mineko is ritually identifying, snuggling up onto the hilt. While he doesn’t expect Mama Daphne to shove a cursed item into one of these delves, it is better to be safe than sorry.

Ootah comes back with a big chest and Tegan with a smaller shield than what Kevin has been using. Granted that is partially because Kevin’s kite shield is about as tall as Mineko, but the 2 foot diameter round shield looks plenty big. They wait for Mineko to get done; she describes the weapon’s current information as they all walk into the recovery room proper:

Frozen Needle [Tier 2] – Rapier. [+1] to hit. 1d8 piercing, [1] cold damage. Finesse. This weapon comes with a number of charges equal to it’s tier level. As an action, the wielder can use a charge to fire off a dagger made of ice. Make a ranged weapon attack as if throwing a dagger. On hit, the dagger deals 1d4 cold damage. This tiered magic item will increase in power as Winter increases in his tier level. Next tier level bonus unlocks at Level 10.

Mineko starts identifying the shield, which is very likely going to Kevin, as the others check out the chest. Inside is a note saying they need to split 380 BP, plus a stuffed fish toy?

Winter sheathes his new sword, then declares, “Well, Kevin and I are getting items, so I guess you two and Mineko should get the bulk of the BP?”

Ootah nods, “That seems reasonable. Tegan’s got muscles to buy, I could see about maybe looking at a transformation, too?”

Tegan doesn’t snarl, exactly, which surprises Winter. Instead she almost agrees, “Well, if I got all the BP, I could get the muscles transformation and be well on my way to having these... things suppressed every once in a while.”

The conversation is interrupted when Mineko hands Kevin the shield, sharing what it does:

Targe of the Blooded – Shield. +1 armor. 1d6 +endurance modifier piercing damage. When this shield is used as part of a bonus action or reaction against a creature within melee range, you may attack with this shield as part of that shield use.

Kevin slips the shield on and gives it a swing. Heavy barbs briefly protract, then retract. “I’d say you three get 100 BP each, then Winter and I split the rest? I am still down on the day, after paying for Gaia’s date.”

Mineko sniffs at the stuffed fish toy, grabs it, then runs to the couch and plays with it. They eventually settle. Ootah and Mineko each gets 100 BP. Kevin gets 50 BP. Tegan gets the rest. Winter grabs Kevin and pulls him upstairs. Time for some boyfriend cuddles!