Faith in Hell

Faith-in-Somebody had no idea how long the questioning lasted. All she did know was that she was questioned for what seemed like hours until finally her interrogators quit -- not because they took pity on her or were satisfied with her answers but because it was time for their evening meal.

By then Faith-in-Somebody was ready to say anything to make the electric shocks stop. But nothing seemed to work. They didn't believe her when she told the truth and they didn't believe her when she tried to make up convincing lies. She was living the life of the damned right here on Earth and there seemed to be no escape for her.

If only B were here, she found herself thinking. Surely she'd save me.

Would she, Faith? she wondered.

Sure, why not? she thought.

After the way you've been treating her? thought her other self. Do you really believe that?

Okay then, she thought. Let's approach the problem another way. What would B do if she were in this situation?

Simple, thought her other self. B would not be in this situation.

But suppose she were, thought Faith-in-Somebody. How would she get out?

Well, first of all, B couldn't possibly cope with a situation like this, thought her other self. She just couldn't. Being endlessly questioned by an evil woman who refused to believe the truth? That's just not B. And if it were, well, then her vampire boyfriend would rescue her. Or Giles. Or Xander. Somebody. B has friends who look out for her. I don't have that option. So asking myself what B would do would be pointless to me.

Okay, then, thought Faith-in-Somebody. Let's try it a different way. How would Gwendolyn Post get out of this situation?

Gwendolyn Post is dead, thought her other self. Why should I try to emulate her?

Because she was able to fool you and Giles and B and all those other smart alecks who look down on you, thought Faith-in-Somebody. That's why.

Okay then, thought her other self. So you're Gwendolyn Post. How would Ms. Post get out of this?

Simple, thought Faith-in-Somebody. The same way she fooled us. She looked for what each of us wanted and then gave it to us. She gave me a mother figure of sorts, Giles an excuse to concentrate on B, and B -- well, I'm sure she gave B something. I just don't know what.

So I need to ask myself, she thought, what do they want? What would they like? What would they believe? What else do I have to offer them besides my services as a vampire slayer?

Why not make the same deal with them that you made with Mayor Wilkins? she asked herself. They're worried about competition? You can offer to eliminate it for them. What have you got to lose?

And sure enough, when the well-dressed brunette returned and the questioning continued, Faith-in-Somebody's confession that she was a hired assassin who specialized in corporate targets proved to be the one thing that finally stopped the electric shocks.

Next comes the offer that I literally can't refuse, thought Faith-in-Somebody.