Entertainment

Without a second thought I begin humping the ground in front of me.

Laughter pours from the car as flashes from cameras light up my performance. “They love it” I thought to myself as my penis poked at the one inch hole forming in the grass. All seemed to enjoy the spectacle except Miss Ivy who was yawning. Not wanting to disappoint her I quickly added another part to my humiliating front lawn ritual.

“MOOO” I called out “MOOOO” I muttered as I stuffed my face into the lawn chewing at grass. There I was pumping at the dirt and chewing grass while mooing like a cow, could I be anymore pathetic?

As if to respond to my private thought Miss Ivy called down to me “okay my pet COW, you’ve earned your feet to the car”

as I start to get up she yells “ be a good pet and go potty first”

As if in a trance I squat down and start to piss. “Why did I squat? Why not stand with some dignity?,”

“Good boy!” Miss Ivy cheered