Conversation with a Dead Person

"You're supposed to be dead," said Buffy-in-Faith to the woman in green. "You died when the spell with the magic glove backfired on you."

"It did not backfire on me," said the woman who had just implied that she was Gwendolyn Post, a former Watcher of Buffy's and Faith's. "Your friend Buffy over there cut off my arm and killed me."

"Well, in all fairness, Buffy -- er, I mean, I -- only killed you because you were trying your damnedest to kill me and Faith," said Buffy-in-Faith. "How did you manage to get back to the land of the living anyway? I thought that was supposed to be impossible."

"You're one to talk," said Ms. Post. "Your friend Buffy came from the dead -- what is it, twice already? And I don't hear you complaining about that."

"Well, the first time was CPR," said Buffy-in-Faith. "And the second time -- well, I always thought that was a dream. It sure seemed like one."

"Well, maybe this is a dream too," said Ms. Post with a sneer. "Anyway, if you're trying to gain my sympathy by convincing me you have a mental disorder, Faith, you can just stop it. Your constant attempts to convince me that you're really Buffy are amusing but they're not going to work. I know what Buffy looks like. I know what you look like. You may know a lot of things that only Buffy should know but that just proves that you and her converse a lot. Now if you'll just stand aside, I have a body to collect."

"Over my dead body," said Kathy Newman as she held the naked but **** body of Faith-in-Buffy in her arms.

"If you insist," said Ms. Post. "Evans."

The man in gray who stood by Ms. Post's side reached into his suit jacket and took out what looked like an extremely large pistol. He fired once at Kathy's chest and attempted to fire again. But before he could do so, Buffy-in-Faith ran up to him and knocked the gun out of his hand. Only to see that the gun she had just hit was a dart gun.

At that moment, Kathy fell to the club floor ****, a tranquilizer dart in her chest. As she fell, she released the naked body of Faith-in-Buffy from her grip and rolled away from it.

Out of frustration, Buffy-in-Faith turned and punched out Evans, rendering him **** with one blow. But the woman in green just smiled.

"I don't see why you're smiling, Ms. Post," said Buffy-in-Faith. "Your man may have just hit Kathy with a tranquilizer dart but it's not like you're going to be able to pick up the woman you call Buffy with just one hand. And since I just knocked out your helper, I guess you're out of luck."

"I am at that," said Ms. Post, extending a hand toward Buffy-in-Faith. "Well played."

Buffy-in-Faith started to reach for Ms. Post's hand, then hesitated. Something was up, she sensed. But what was it?

Then Ms. Post reached for Buffy-in-Faith's hand and gripped it tightly. In the midst of the grip, Buffy-in-Faith felt something metal.

There was a sudden flare of light. Then a sound of thunder.

And then suddenly she was looking at Faith's body from the viewpoint of the woman in green. Indeed, when she looked down, she saw that she was the woman in green. And that the woman in Faith's body had something metal in her hand. A small metal something that looked like the same device Faith had used on her during the original body swap.

Only this one hasn't been destroyed yet, thought Buffy-in-Gwendolyn. So there's still time to reverse the body swap.

Buffy-in-Gwendolyn automatically tried to grab for it with her right hand -- and then suddenly realized that she no longer had a right hand.

Not that mattered. The very next thing she saw was Ms. Post placing the body swap talisman in her pocket before Buffy-in-Gwendolyn could reach for it again with her left hand.

And the very next thing Buffy-in-Gwendolyn saw after that was the sight of Gwendolyn-in-Faith's clenched right fist rushing up fast and furious toward Buffy-in-Gwendolyn's current face.