Clothing raffle

As the couple walked into the banqueting hall of Baggio's, Jessica's jaw dropped as she saw a sign printed on the registration table.

"PURCHASE TICKETS FOR A RAFFLE OF JESSICA'S CLOTHING - $1 EA." it said, with a picture of Jessica in all her glory from that terrible first day ten years ago. Below it was a fishbowl of green tickets that was already half full, and seated behind the table was the class president Mallory with a Cheshire grin.

"Mallory!" Jessica stormed up to her, "what is the meaning of all this?"

"Come on, Lutz..." Mallory beamed at the blonde whose face was getting increasingly red, "we all know you want it."

"It's 'Johnson' now..." Jessica corrected as Jared walked up behind her with a sheepish look on his face.

"Honey," Jessica turned to Jared, "tell this bitch off - this is wholly inappropriate, and I do not consent to this."

"Well... honey..." Jared rubbed the back of his neck, "Mallory and I were talking... maybe this would be a fun way to relive the good times... you've always been so stuffy..."

Jessica's heart sank as she realized her husband was in cahoots about this. She decided her next move, thankful for having memorized the numbers of the divorce lawyers across town.