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Mineko

Writing letters is hard!

There are a bunch of things to do when you write a letter, as Mineko is in the process of discovering. Step one is to know who you are writing to. The nekomata is told that the group started a “group chat” to discuss who should write to whom. Tessa is nice enough to tell her who the group decided would be the one that Mineko gets to write to.

Next, you have to figure out what to say. That is tricky. The cat-girl is not used to the idea of people caring about what she thinks. Still, she thinks she came up with a good few ideas and questions.

Then, comes the actual writing. The nekomata is proud of her work. A whole letter written in an hour feels impressive to the cat-girl, even if Gaia wrote more and still finished hers faster. Mineko is especially excited that she wrote out her name on the piece of paper correctly the first time! Tessa is still not super happy with the results.

“Mineko, half of these words are misspelled. Is that supposed to be ‘hello?’”

Mineko nods.

“‘Hello’ is spelled with two letter ‘l’s. H-e-l-l-o. Hello.”

Mineko furrows her brows, “That is silly. Why use the same letter twice in a row?”

Tessa sighs. Mineko looks down, her ears drooping. I thought I did a good job writing my letter. The cat-girl sniffles.

“Hey, Mineko, you made a very good first attempt. If you are proud of your work, I will make sure that it gets sent. And I bet your next letter will be even better.”

Mineko perks up. I did a good job! She purrs happily, hoping for good kitty pets, which Gaia provides. Goooood kitty...

Tessa sends them out to go find presents to send with the letter. Gaia seems a bit grumpy as they walk the amenities floor. Mineko asks, “What is a presents?”

Gaia stops grumbling to answer, “A present is when you give someone something that you think they would enjoy.”

“Oh. I have never gotten a present before.”

Gaia squeezes Mineko in a side hug. “I am sure Mona will give you lots of presents in time.”

“Really?!?!”

“Really.”

An out of breath Airika waves as they start to pass by the clothing shop, “Hey... goobers... got... present ideas... for you...”

The cat and rhino girls look at each other. Gaia shrugs, “Lay it on us.”

Airika stops faking being out of breath. She swaggers as she pulls out a yellow trench coat. “For your letter recipient. Made of 100% vegan leather.”

Gaia snags the present, noting, “Sold. Put it on the fan mail letter budget thingy.”

The siren smirks as she snags it back, “Not even going to ask about the rest?”

“You know how hard it is to find high quality vegan leather?” Gaia asks in response. Mineko shrugs. Finding plant materials suitable as a leather substitute is quite a difficult challenge, especially in that shade of yellow.

Airika shrugs, “Okay. I bet I picked well. For your letter recipient, Mineko, I have this.” The pink frilly apron that the siren holds up has little calico kittens on it. Mineko wonders if she can have it for herself. It is quite cute and Mona wants her to want things.

“May I...”

“It’s designed to help the girl you wrote to, but if you want to buy it for yourself instead...”

Mineko shakes her head no. I can’t steal her present! That would be mean! “If you can get it ready to be delivered...”

Airika nods and does exactly that. “They’ll be sent with your letters.”

Gaia gives more hugs and head pats. Mineko purrs in glee. When they return to the swings, Tessa has Mineko’s letter ready to ship. The nekomata shakes her tails and pounces on a beetle. She shows her work to Gaia, who tells her not to squish it. Then, it’s time to play on the swings again.

“Swings! Swings! Swings! Swings!”

Winter

Jenny quickly loses track of Andromeda’s game. To be fair, the stack can get extremely complicated with all the “free” counterspells in Vintage. She turns to watch Winter’s game instead.

Mama Daphne has her big shark-toothed grin on. She sweetly asks, “You want Sekolah or the souped up ‘me’ version?”

Oooh, I am going to regret this. “Hit me with the custom card. I know you want to show off the art.” To be fair, the rendition of the mermaid is very good.

Daphne, Making Megalodons for... Reasons

2UR

Legendary Creature – Mermaid Wizard

Eminence – As long as Daphne is in the deity zone or on the battlefield, whenever you draw a card, create a 1/1 red and blue shark token with flying and haste.

Islandwalk

Whenever Daphne deals combat damage to a player, draw that many cards.

Daphne can be your deity.

2/2

Daphne answers Jenny’s questions about both deities as Winter thinks. Okay. Her Sekolah’s effect, as an eminence ability. That is probably broken. Still, I don’t need deathtouch to kill a shark...

They shuffle. Jenny watches, commenting on how big the decks look. Winter resists making a dick joke.

Winter takes a look at his opening hand. Guaranteed Eilistraee cast on turn three, plus a Helm of the Host in hand? This is surprisingly keepable. Mama Daphne wiggling in glee makes me worried, but whatever.

Both keep and Winter gets the start. Daphne has a turn one Sol Ring. Urk! Winter drew into a turn two Angel’s Aid, which will be a big discount on the equip cost for the Helm.

“So, can I ask a personal question?” Jenny asks the room. “It’s, like, kind of embarrassing though?”

Esme stops mid-draw step and leans in. Daphne plays her third leyline and waits a bit more patiently. Andromeda looks like she is too much into the tournament grinder sweat tank to really respond. Winter shrugs, “Sure. Go ahead.”

“So, I totes caught Tessa masturbating last night. Not, like, in the act, but right after. And I think she was thinking, like, about me? What should I, like, do about it?”

The question hits like a boulder dropping in a still pond. Andromeda comes enough out of her hyper focus on the game to blush and mutter, “Have you tried to talk with Tessa about it rationally?”

While Jenny sits to think, Daphne continues her turn. Winter’s Helm plan goes out the window with a turn three Time Reversal. They are both tapped out, so he lets Daphne speed play the rest of the turn while he shuffles. The mermaid swings with 10 flying sharks and her eponymous deity. Winter blocks the deity with Eilistraee and kills a token to remove that problem. He’s still down to 8 life. He needs a miracle.

“I have kind of been avoiding her? I am totally embarrassed by the whole thing.”

Winter asks while drawing his cards, “There a reason why?”

“I was, like, totally jilling off in the bathroom. And I think she cleaned up the mess while I was in the shower.”

Oh. Wow. That sounds like something to be embarrassed about. The new seven cards in hand did not have Winter’s miracle. Nor did his draw for the turn. Mama Daphne got me. Onto Game 2.

Esme giggles a little, “Well, none of that is a big deal. I jill off 3, 4 times a night.”

Winter rolls his eyes at his bunny-sister, “And Jenny isn’t a hoppalong. She’s a human that got wrapped up in all of this. How do you feel about Tessa?”

While Jenny thinks, the players again both keep. Both have a slower start. Winter doesn’t draw a black leyline in time. An arcane signet is a much less broken rock than a Sol Ring on his mermaid-mom’s end.

“I don’t know. I mean, she’s sweet and kind and she, like, totally looks out for me, for sure. But, I don’t, like, like her, you know, that way?”

Turn 3, Winter tutors for an Illusionist Bracers, hoping he finds something to drop on Eilistraee once she’s on the field to start shooting down multiple sharks. Thornbite Staff is just too expensive this early in the game.

“Sounds kind of like a Dani and Carly situation, maybe?” Mama Daphne answers while Winter is busy tutoring.

“Dani and Carly? Who are they?”

Winter answers while Daphne plays a mostly uneventful turn, “Dani is the Kevin of her season. She’s the lesbian friend of her season’s master. Her season is much worse for her than Kevin has it here. She can only earn VP with her master and most of her transformations have been designed to remove her disgust about it. Anyways, Carly is another contestant. They started a romantic relationship with each other, despite Carly not being sexually attracted to women.”

The Command Tower Winter draws is a black source. Eilistraee is deployed and swings. Life totals are now 18 to 14, favoring the mermaid.

“You’re saying that Tessa is crushing on me?”

“It makes sense,” Andromeda notes, “You two both have a lot in common. That, plus the proximity, can add up to sexual attraction.”

Then, Daphne plays a Trident of Deep Sashelas. Oof. Four flying sharks swing. Eilistraee can pop one. Daphne gets three more. Then she cycles away a leyline to draw another card (and make another shark).

“What do you mean, we have a lot in common? She’s, like, so composed and classy and, I dunno, an actual adult person. I’m just a kid that got turned into a coffee table before I had a chance to grow up...”

Daphne snorts, “I say this with a lot of love, but my sister-in-law is just as much of an emotional wreck as you are. She spent decades trying to find my Beloved. You know what that does to a person, looking for someone with no success, sacrificing so much to keep funding a wild goosefish chase? Trust me. She needs someone to assure her just as much as you do.”

Having to fetch a basic black leyline with a Marsh Flats hurts, but Winter can kill the Trident with some artifact removal. He swings with Eilistraee and Daphne just eats the damage.

Winter points out, “Also, you grew up in a similar time and place. Both of you are going to relate to each other better than with kids.”

“Aren’t you a kid, too?”

“Sure, I am a barely an adult by elven standards, but you are only older than me by a technicality and not by much.”

Meanwhile, Daphne smugly casts Mindmoil, followed up with a Ponder. Eight sharks turn into 14. Winter loses.

Winter: Minor Quest Update! Record 0-2

“I don’t know if it’s just my bad luck or a failure of the format, but I just can’t seem to get a win. Thanks for the game, Mama Daph.”

Daphne gives the drow a big death grip hug. Winter sputters out that he can’t breathe in Elvish. Then Esme finishes off Andromeda, teasing, “And my bro’s bad luck rubbed off on you, Andromeda. Better luck next time.”

Andromeda: Minor Quest Update! Record 2-2

Andromeda offers the handshake, replying, “Good games.”

“So, what should I do?”

Winter gasps for air as her mermaid-mom’s kraken hug ends. Once he can breathe properly, he answers, “Take Tessa out for a date? At least talk to her. Avoiding an awkward conversation is not going to work for long.”

Jenny nods, a bit of resolve running through her spine. “I am going to go get some sunlight before dinner. Maybe let Tessa know that I want to apologize if you see her first?”

Winter smiles and gives Jenny a thumbs up. He enjoys watching her walk away. Andromeda muses, “I think that lesson went well.”