Clara, the Bare Naked Bandit

You are Clara, a rogue living in the kingdom of Larion. You walk down the city street looking for somewhere to steal from. You look around and see a shop with a closed shutter. You saunter over and reach into it to grab some of the goods inside. Then you pause, the owner is standing behind you.

You act natural and see what the man is trying to sell you. A small red jewel, a ruby no doubt held in a silver ring.

You smile and nod and listen to the man's sales pitch. Then you pull a small pouch from your pocket and begin to count out coins for the gems.

You pay the shopkeeper with fake coins. The shopkeeper looks at the fake coins but says nothing.

After pocketing your loot you walk off down the street and then turn a corner.

You see a mansion, and decide that tonight you'll sneak in and rob the place.

At midnight, you scout around the mansion to look for an entrance. You spot an open window on the second floor. You climb up on the roof of a nearby building and into the window. As you climb through the window, it shuts on its own, and you get stuck halfway through.

You push against the window and try to get through, but you can't. The window is locked.

You realize that the window is caught on your pants, and that if you let them fall off you can make it through.

You quietly sigh, and climb through the window, letting your pants fall to the ground outside. This leaves your panties exposed. You try not to think about that as you start forward, trying not to make any loud noises.

You start to search rooms of the mansion for valuables. You find a few pieces of expensive furniture, some wine bottles, a few more valuable items. You count up the loot and realize that this mansion has a large fortune in it.

You come across a room filled with expensive looking weapons. You pause, wondering why a rich man would have such an arsenal of weapons in his house, when a simple castle guard could easily protect him.

As you start to step into the room, you hear a noise.

The noise was caused by you bumping into a war axe on the wall. It falls, but thanks to your expert reflexes you manage to dodge it. Unfortunately, it snags your shirt, tearing it clean off. Your bra is now visible, leaving you in nothing but your underwear and boots.

The noise of the axe falling and you clothing being torn causes you to let out a gasp, and you turn to look at the room filled with weapons.

Part of you wants to call it quits and get out while you can, but something shiny catches your eye.

You see a small box on a table alongside the weapons. You approach it, and recognize it as the mansion's safe. You want to pick the lock, but your lock picks were in your pants.

You reach out for the box, and pick it up. The box is light, but you feel sure it must contain a large sum of money.

You walk back out of the room, and into the main foyer of the mansion. You hurry over to the nearest door and try to open it, but it's locked.

You look around and find an old dusty keyring hanging on the floor. You pick it up and try it on the door, and after a few try’s it turns freely. You push it open and walk inside.You're in a bedroom now.

An occupied bedroom.

There is a couple in the bed. They seem to be too occupied with each other to notice you. You don't want to alert them, so you try to quietly disappear into the closet in the room.

Sadly, you didn’t notice how small the closet is. You stand up straight, and can barely move. There's no way you'll be able to hide if someone comes through the door.

You wait for what must have been half an hour, the sounds of the couples lovemaking your only stimulus. Despite the circumstances, you feel your nipples hardening. Whatever he’s doing to her he must be doing it right. She’s moaning louder than you ever have. It’s almost enough to make you start touching yourself, but you restrain yourself.

“Calm down Clara.” You think to yourself. “We can celebrate at home.”

Not long after you finally hear them get up. They start to speak. You can't make out what they're saying. All you hear is the slurring of their words.

You're about to leave the room when you hear the woman say something to the man.

“I wish you’d have been more patient instead of ripping my panties off. They were quite expensive.” She says, and you hear her approach the closet.

You move back as best you can, as she slowly opens the closet.

She sticks her hand inside the door, and feels around. You don’t want her looking inside, so you do the only thing that you can think to do. You slip your panties off, and hold them up so she would grab them.

You hear her say 'Ah, there they are' as they leave the room.

You walk back into the bedroom, now bottomless. The couple is gone, and you can hear music coming from down the hall. You hurry down the hall and find yourself in another richly decorated room. You don't recognize the artwork, but you can tell they are expensive.

The room is cluttered with paintings, expensive furniture, and more. You spot the painting that you were originally searching for.

It dons on you that you don't have any of your tools anymore, and therefor have no way of carrying so much stuff. You have to decide between the locked box and the painting.

You could attempt to pry open the locked box when you get home.

You could attempt to carry off the painting.

You decide that it would be best to bring home the safe, not the painting. You run out of the room and into the foyer. You head straight for the front door, and exit the mansion. As you trot towards your horse, you can't help but notice that you now have company. A tall, dark man stands beside it.

You cover your exposed pussy with the box.

"It would seem that someone has lost something." He says with a thick accent. He then says, “I’m afraid that box belongs to me.” You look up at his face and notice a large, curved knife in his hand.

"Finders keepers." You reply, trying not to show fear.

"You might be thinking that, but you'd be wrong." He steps towards you, causing you to back up. "You should have thought about that before you stole something that doesn't belong to you."

You look around and see that your horse is gone. You aren't even close to your home, and for all you know this guy has buddies that will come after you.

"Let's be reasonable here." You say, trying to stall for time.

"Reasonable? You're trying to steal something that doesn't belong to you? Maybe you should be more concerned with your own situation." He says, referring to your nearly nude figure.

Your eyes briefly glance at his crotch, and you see that he is completely hard.

"Maybe I should." You reply, trying to keep a steady head.

You hate what you’re planning, but it’s better than the alternative. You look him dead in the eye and slowly move your body towards his. You drop the box and begin to remove your bra, leaving you wearing nothing but boots.

"Come on, baby. You know you want to." You say, running your hands across your body.

He stares at you for a moment, and then his eyes flick down to your newly exposed body.

“Perhaps we can make a deal.” You say, beginning to bounce your breasts by your nipples. He still seems on guard, but his eyes are clearly focused on your body. When you finally reach him, you raise your hands toward his. “Why don’t you ditch that knife and show me something else that’s long and hard?”

Mystified by your body, he does as you ask, dropping the knife. You were about to make your move when he starts fondling your boobs. You gasp, shocked at his brazenness.

“Maybe we can come to an arrangement.” He says. You don’t even get a chance to speak before he kisses you right on the lips. Inside you’re freaking out, being groped and kissed by this stranger. You want to run but can’t escape his hands. He breaks the kiss. “But I don’t think our company would approve.”

He spins you around, and you shriek as you see most of the household just outside the front door. They all can see you, and they can see ALL of you.

“That must be the pervert,” a girl you recognize from the bedroom says. “She was watching Hans and I while touching herself from our closet. I only noticed because she tried to trick me into wearing her panties. They were so drenched with her fluids I had to wash my hands before alerting anyone.”

Realizing it’s now or never, you enact your plan.

You tense your legs as hard as you can and kick, hoping to find your target. Your foot connects with the mans groin and you hear him yell out. You act quickly, grabbing the box and running away. You hear him call out to the others in the mansion, and they begin to chase you.

As you run you remember why you chose tonight. A big festival is going on, and you had planned to use the crowds to disappear. But because you're naked, it only makes you stick out more.

You cover your pussy with the box and your breasts with your free hand and take off running. Several people see you, and begin to point and whisper. They must think you're a complete idiot. You hear one person yell out "Nude!" causing everyone else to laugh. A few people are even brave enough to touch you, and you receive a handful of smacks on your ass.

You try to ignore them and make your way to a lone horse. When you reach him, you mount up and gallop away. This fools your pursuers, and they lose you in the streets. You gallop off into the woods.

—

You’ve decided you need to lay low a few days. This does unfortunately leave you naked save for your boots, as you can’t sneak home quite yet. It’s embarrassing, but if you keep to the trees you should remain undetected.

You do eventually find what you were hoping for. A large boulder, big enough to bash open the box. It takes you a few hours, but your hard work pays off when you finally manage to cave the lid in.

You shudder in anticipation, and remove the lid to find your treasure. Inside, you find a slip of parchment, and a wooden object. The parchment reads:

“To the rich pricks who live here, go fuck yourselves.”

It would seem some other thief beat you to the box, and replaced the contents. You raise the wooden object up, and realize what it is.

A carved and polished wooden dildo.

You groan in frustration, falling onto your back with an arm over your eyes. All that work and humiliation for a worthless sex toy.

You lay still a while, pondering your predicament. After a few minutes, you raise your arm, and look to the wooden phallus.

“I mean, it is well made.” You say to yourself, already spreading your legs. “And I am gonna be out here a while.”

And that’s the story of how Larion Forest became known as Moaning Woods.