Claire, who has a time-saving idea while shopping for clothes.

"Hey, can I grab a fitting room?"

The attendant, an extremely bored-looking young woman with purple highlights, gives me a listless nod. "Any one that's free."

I muster a polite smile. "Thanks." Hefting the load of clothes draped over my arm, I head back into the hallway. The store's pretty busy, Saturday afternoon and all, but there's still one stall door standing ajar; I quickly move to claim it.

Shutting it behind me, I toss my purse and prospective purchases on the little shelf provided and quickly strip out of my t-shirt and yoga pants. Mindful of the bikini sitting on top of the pile—summer's fast approaching—I shed my bra and panties too. My reflection watches from the full-length mirror: brown angular bob, curvy as always but keeping things together well at thirty-four with a nice hourglass, skin definitely getting in need of that summer sun. Smirking, I indulge in a little mirror narcissism, cupping my heavy tits for a moment, giving the silver ring piercing my right nipple a tug. A little stubble's starting to show on my normally smooth-shaved mound; I make a mental note to buy more razor blades later.

As soon as I get a look at the bikini, I can tell it's a no-go. The purple pattern is just not my color. Setting it aside, I put it from my mind as I try on the rest of my prospects. A few minutes later, I'm left with an expanded "no" pile and a smaller "maybe" pile, plus one definite "yes," a pair of Daisy Dukes that make my ass look absolutely killer. With round one complete, I turn back to my own clothes, ready to re-dress myself and head back out for more.

But something makes me hesitate.

Why, I wonder for the first time in all my years of shopping, should I bother putting my own clothes back on? I'm just gonna come back in here and take them off again to try on more stuff, probably more than once. Really, isn't it just a needless hassle?

It only takes me a couple seconds to make up my mind. Picking up my purse, I leave my own clothes and the store's where they are as I open the fitting room door and step out in nothing but my sandals.