Can she be reasoned with?

"Wait," Adam said suddenly. "If you go to the phantasmatology lab and get this haunting excorcised, that will be a win, right? Shouldn't you do that?"

Maria and Amanda both scoffed. "It doesn't work like that," Amanda said. "Watch. Hey Maria, would it be a good thing if I socked your tit?"

Maria looked at her incredulously. "What kind of question is that? Of course not!"

"Cool," Amanda said, and delivered a sharp jab to Maria's right breast. Maria cried out and grabbed her bruised mammary, scowling at Amanda.

"So that wasn't good?" Amanda asked.

"Is there a gas leak in here? Of course it was good! You did exactly what I wanted!" Maria prodded the side of her breast gently and hissed with pain. "Hurts like a son of a bitch, though. You're really lucky I was hoping to get slapped around today."

"See?" Amanda said as they followed Maria out of the office and towards the elevator bank. "Retroactive only. If she went along with everything that you suggested that would be enthusiasm. This is triumph. Totally different."

"Are you hearing this?" Adam demanded. "You're just going along with whatever happens! She's explaining it right in front of you, Maria! You have to get this fixed!"

"I don't have to do anything," Maria said. She stopped in front of the eleveators and jabbed the down arrow. "I'm not a moron. I know how hauntings work, and I know I'm haunted by triumph. I don't care! I'm finally getting exactly what I want-"

"But you only think you want it!" Adam interrupted. His shrill, panicky voice drew the attention of several other researchers nearby. As they stepped onto the elevator, Maria patiently explained.

"You're the one who doesn't understand hauntings, dumbass. You think I forgot that I didn't want to get punched in the boob? I remember, but the haunting made me glad it happened."

Adam was at a loss for words, so Amanda smugly completed the thought. "It's not making her think she wants something she doesn't, dumbass. It's making her actually want it. It's warping her personality in real time!"

"Fuck me..." Adam said. His face had gone pale again and he was starting to hyperventilate. Amanda laughed at his dismay while Maria checked her phone.

"Is this fucking funny to you?" he demanded.

"Not yet," Amanda said as the elevator doors opened onto the lobby of the research institute. Maria swaggered out, her confidence growing with each step, and her coworkers followed.