Be Still

It’s amazing how quickly novelty can shift to tedium when you’ve got nothing to do. Colly, after a long masturbation session, was splayed out under the hammocks snoozing while above her Cassie continued working on her project, its phallic shape growing more defined by the minute. Above them Rosa lay in a world of her own as she mimicked some of the noises she’d heard Kreer make again and again, shifting pitch and tone as her tapered ears tilted and twisted to catch the sounds. I pass the time as best I can. I water and clean up after Catalus. I get in some of the calisthenic exercises Toke had taught me, the ones I could perform inside our cramped area, and eventually I even ask Nikias if there were some duties I might pitch in on, to which I am told a most emphatic ‘No’. He tell me to let sailors be sailors and to stick to ‘adventuring work’, hinting again that he might have something in mind for me without actually telling me what it was. As evening neared I was becoming stir crazy. Back on the farm there was ALWAYS something to do. On the road there came a decision or something to consider every mile along the way. And at the manor the project of bringing the old palace back to its former glory had been a full-time job. Never in my life, not even when my Lady had me trussed up in full bondage, had I felt so…confined. I just wasn’t built to be a passenger. I needed to DO something! Hearing the calls and hardworking grunts of the men above me only drives that reality home.

After pacing a couple of times I sit back down and wipe the sweat off of my bare chest, my tunic having been removed during my exercise, and try again to settle my restless soul. Out of the corner of my eye I see Rosa’s head tilt at the sound of my sigh. Kissing Danae’s head she adroitly slips off of her hammock and in one fluid motion slides onto my lap.

“Mmm.” She smiles as she feels my bare, warm flesh against her delicate hands. Unlike the rest of our sweaty group the afternoon’s heat, that had turned the ship’s stuffy hold into an oven, hadn’t caused a single bead of perspiration upon my Lady’s perfect brow. Her soft touch is dry as her palm runs across my slick chest as was her silky thighs that sat upon mine beneath her dress. Without being asked she takes the towel I’d been using and begins to wipe my body.

“Did I bother you, my Lady?” I whisper, petting her long soft hair.

“No bother.” She says softly, keeping her voice low like I was to keep our words just between us. “What’s wrong, my boy?” Before I can even speak she answers for me. “Restless?”

“Restless.” I confirm.

Her slender fingers trace the shape of my pecs. “All these muscles and nothing to do.”

“Exactly.” I huff, leaning into her and resting my forehead on her near horn. “I don’t understand why Nikias won’t let me work. I could help.”

“He doesn’t need help, my love.” She coos, softly petting my hair. “He needs us out of the way so the crew can do their job.”

“Two to three weeks of this? I can’t.”

“You can.” Rosa says, kissing my chest. “And you will. Your service is not for the captain. It is mine.”

“Always, my Lady. But…”

“Shhh.” She touches my lips, her blind eyes staring at them as she sees through her fingers. “Still.”

“That’s easy for you to…”

“I said…” Her voice firms with authority. “Still.”

It wasn’t advice, it was a command as sure as ‘Kneel’ or ‘Bow’ or ‘Inspection’ was. Falling silent I bring my body to complete rest.

“Good boy.” She whispers as her hands run across my shoulders. “Ease your body, my mighty warrior. Not loose, not tense, at peace.” When I do as she says, finding the balance she wanted, she nods. “Good boy.”

We sit like this for a minute…two…three…

“I think Nikias is up to something. He…”

“Still.”

“Yes, my Lady.” I sigh and refocus.

Again we sit for a few minutes…and a few more…and a few more…

This time Rosa catches me before I can even break the silence. “Still, my boy. That is your command.” Touching my forehead with the tips of her fingers she says again. “Still.”

“Rosa…”

“I am your Lady.”

“My Lady.” I correct myself. “I can’t hold my focus for days at a time. Even for you. It’s impossible.”

“Of course it is. Like flexing a muscle or holding a weight, eventually you will tire. But you are not holding anything, boy, so be still.”

“I’ll try.”

“Are you still my good boy?”

“My Lady! Always. Forever. I am yours.” Bowing my head I lean closer, seeking assurance and receiving it in the form of a kiss to my forehead. “I’m yours. I would take Atlas’ burden from his shoulders for you if I were capable.”

“I know you would, my love.” She strokes my face tenderly, fingertips playing at my temple. “You are right that even the most obedient man’s focus has its limits. But ‘Still’ does not require focus like a pose. Nor do you let go of yourself like you do in my ropes. It’s neither concentration nor surrender, it is a choice. An act of freedom.”

“I…I don’t understand.”

“Do you wish to sit still for me? Do you wish to obey? Freely?”

“Of course I do, my Lady.”

“Then.” She boops me. “Sit still, silly.”

“But…”

“If you cannot, then you are not free.” One by one she finds strands of hair stuck to my sweaty brow and smooths them back. “If you cannot be still even when you wish to be still, either in mind or body, then you are not as free as you think you are.” The back of her fingers stroke back down my cheek as her cadence slows. “Listen to my voice. Feel my hand and my weight on your legs. Breath deeply.” She speaks and I obey. “Good boy. In. Out. Slow. Deep. Close your eyes. Feel the waves move the ship. Feel the wood at your back and hear it’s song all around us.”

Sitting in a state of half rest and half readiness I obey my commands, mindful of the things she was presenting me. I feel the rough grain of the wood against my back, the aroma of the pine resin fills my nostrils, sounds of waves and creaking timber surround me, and Rosa’s emanating warmth and her weight on my thighs holds my focus…for a time. Quiet minutes pass before I whisper.

“I’m sorry. The thoughts…”

“Do not fight them, my boy.” Her hands cup both my cheeks. “Explore them. Examine them. Then find your way back again. What are you thinking about?”

“Just…doing something. Anything!”

“Not anything.” She says. “Find a thread and follow it.”

“I…don’t…”

“Remember that time you came home from training with your ear bloodied and your ego bruised.”

“Of course.” I whisper. “Lucas caught me with that lucky elbow. But my ego wasn’t bruised. It was all part of the training.”

“Oh?” She trills. “Was it really a lucky elbow?”

As always my Lady sliced and diced my masculine defense mechanisms. “No, my Lady. It was a fair blow and well struck. It was not lucky.”

“Good boy. Now, go back there.” She urges me. “Right here and now. Morpheus the dream-giver has blessed you, my beautiful rope slut. Harness that power. Keep one foot here as you escape with the other. You are on the training platform, around you the forest. Toke and the others stand watching you. Across from you Lucas is eager to prove himself against the star pupil, his sister’s beau and the man who took the leadership of his own crew by the command of his father. He’s studying you. Looking for weakness. He knows he cannot match your strength.”

As she speaks the shouts of the men and the crack of sail fade to the background and I find myself standing upon the stone platform in the clearing on the land I’d inherited. Long shadows lay across the platform and the sky is rosy as the sun dips low in the West. I see Lucas, as stocky as a bulldog and just as pugnacious, facing me with his hands up ready to attack or defend. His eyes dart to my hips, my shoulders, my eyes then back to my chest again. I watch through my own eyes as hands reach out to grab him. He surprises me by taking hold of my left shoulder with his right hand, his stout fingers digging deep into my flesh. The opportunity to take his back was right there and so I lunge…only to feel the sharp sting of his elbow making contact with my ear as instead of resisting me he spins with me. A bead of sweat drips from my earlobe and down my neck, but to my mind it was blood. I see Lucas slip away from me, arms raised in triumph at the rare clean blow he’d dealt me.

“You see it?” Rosa asks, her breath hot against my other ear.

“I see it all.”

“Good, my boy. Very good. Now…do it again. But better.”

“Better?”

She does not answer. Eyes still closed I again replay the scene. The men. The forest. The cooling night. I see Lucas, feet set and hands up and eyes flitting… There! For just a split second his gaze had lingered on my left shoulder. A portent on what was to come. A moment later I see his right hand shoot forward, his fingers digging deep. There! His back foot twisted inward, heel off the ground. There! His left hip kept back and cocked, primed for the spin that would follow. The clues were all there, they’d always been there! I move to take gain control of his back but this time as I watch his coiled trap spring I pull my head back so that his elbow sails past harmlessly and opens his back up for the choke that would follow.

Rosa’s velvet tone filters though the rustling boughs of the forest around me. “If you want to work, work. If you want to train, train. If you want to fight, then fight. When it is time to act then we will act. Right now it is our time for still. So… Still.”

I take a deep breath. “Yes, my Lady.”

“Good boy.” She kisses my head again. “Now, tell me. Where will you go next? What do you want to do? If you could do anything, right now, what would it be?”

“Make love to you, my Lady.”

Her ‘Ladyness’ cracks a moment as she giggles, her tight little ass bouncing against my balls. “I should have known you’d say that.”

“It’s the truth.” I smirk. “I would never lie to you, my Lady.”

Rosa’s soft body shifts closer. Beneath the folds of her skirt that covered her legs and the tops of mine I feel a snaking tail slither up under my underbreeches. When she feels me tense she whispers once more. “Still.”