Back to the drawing board

“I’m sorry I ruined the mood.” Jake finally broke the silence, addressing the room in general.

Dave had been preoccupied with his own train of thought, so a “Hmmmm?” was the most intelligent response he could muster on short notice.

“I tried acting like a good girlfriend.” Bridget elaborated a hint of frustration in her voice “ Practiced it in my head the whole way back, how I would kiss you and give you a little show. But then I started acting like a bitch. ” she finally looked over to Dave “ I’ll try to make it up to you next time. Just tell me what to do.”

Dave had always envied Jakes ability to get right up after he failed, and….waitaminute “What do you mean. Acted like a bitch?”

“The whole hissy-fit I threw?” the blonde had trouble meeting Daves eyes, she’d always hated admitting fault “And pushing you around like that. I’m supposed to do what you want, not the other way round. ”

His newly minted girlfriend looked even more uncomfortable as Dave only made a thoughtful ‘Huh’ and mulled that idea over with the same expression he usually had when he found a way to exploit a game-Ai or other way to game the system “Do what I want hmmm. Why not call me master, then. Like every other maid.”

For a moment Jake looked like she was about to protest, before shuffling into her best imitation of a prim posture: Back straight, hands folded on her lap and eyes glued to the floor. “If you want, master. Should I look for a uniform? Something like the redheaded twins from Melty….something? You kept gushing about them. Master.”

And the reason why Dave had been so fascinated by them was their ability to cut a man to pieces with their tongue, without ever breaching etiquette. The flurry of insinuations and veiled insults whenever someone invoked their ire had been hilarious!

They had been servants, sure, but they definitely hadn’t been servile.

The realization that the gorgeous blond kneeling before Dave would actually put on a maid-costume and serve him if he just asked, DID have a certain appeal. For a moment he was tempted to see how far he could take this, to see if she’d make cat noises too.

But Jake wasn’t really doing this of his own free will, so curiosity (and vanity) would have to wait.

“As uhm..as amusing as that might look, you do remember that you are just supposed to treat me like a girlfriend should, not necessarily fulfill my every whim.”

When the girl before him just continued to stare at the floor, Dave tried again “Right?”

“Weeeell” Jake answered slowly “I always hated it when a girl started nagging me.”

Dave wasn’t really sure what to make of that. Jake had been rather open about his sexual adventures but he hadn’t really mentioned bondage or anything like that. On the other hand, Dave had made a point of not asking for details. Should he ask now? And what if the answer was ‘Yes’? And…and this was getting much to complicated. “Look, the entire girlfriend concept clearly needs more work” Dave admitted massaging the bridge of his nose with thumb and forefinger “Mind if we table it for now and you help me with some other stuff? ”

“Uhmmm sure?” Jake seemed a bit wary, but at least she was meeting Daves eye again.

“Don’t worry. I put a lot of thought into making sure I don’t cause irreparable damage.” Dave assured him as he got up to retrieve the wishbone and a few sheets of paper from his desk.

“First of all….” Ethereal flames enveloped Daves hand “…. speak Russian.”

-----------three rather productive hours later-----------

“I’m sure you two lovebirds have…..” Lindas eyes narrowed as a once-again-male Jake followed Dave into the kitchen to join them for supper.

Dave raised his hands to ward of his mothers questioning look “Jake understands how you felt by now. We errrr…. did things.”

Laura snorted “And apparently he was very persuasive.”

“What? “Dave asked before understanding dawned ” Oh! No! Not really no. I mean, he’d probably licked my ….feet clean without making a fuss.” Jake scrunched up his face at the idea, but nodded as Dave continued “But I would have felt like a jerk the entire time, and you said the point of this was to see what Jake considers an ideal girlfriend. So instead I just asked.” adding with a smug expression “Turns out, the bone is a great tool for psycho-analysis.”

“I still don’t know why you wouldn’t let me remember that part.” Jake complained.

“Because confronting all the stuff you lie to yourself about, all at once was VERY distressing for you.” He nudged his head in Lauras direction “And because she wanted you to learn the normal way: By working on it instead of the bone just magically putting everything right.”

“Damn right I do.” Laura confirmed grimly. “So you were playing Dr. Freud this entire time?”

Daves smug grin got even wider “Not exactly.”

Over Meatballs and Spaghettis Dave- with Jake occasionally adding his own two cents- told his mother what else he had found out about the wishbone.

It couldn’t change someone clothes for example, but the subject could be commanded to cover his hands in a tough leathery hide before shedding it, producing a glove. Jake also managed to produce strings of silk and wool on command, and dye it in various colors but the two hadn’t found out how to weave them into cloth yet. It was even possible to produce buttons of wood or horn that were ‘sewn’ to the skin by forming around strings that were anchored in the skin with both ends.

Sadly the magic drew the line at synthetic materials and precious metals

Dave had been much more careful manipulating Jakes mind, because – unlike with physical modifications- he didn’t know what would happen if he told Jake to remove all psychological changes/damage.

Adding common skills and knowledge like speaking Russian or Kung Fu (Dave just couldn’t resist the opportunity to quote ‘The Matrix’) seemed to be well within the Bones capabilities. Ancient Sumerian, nuclear Launch-Codes or other things known only to a handful of people on the other hand resulted in painfully hot flames flaring up around the bone before guttering out and a splitting head-ache for Jake.

Predicting the result of a dice-roll had a similar effect.

While Dave was still describing the failed attempt at divination, Jake suddenly perked up “There is something else. I’d been too distracted by all the weird to put my finger on it ‘til now, but.... when I had the bone they were reddish orange like normal flames. When Dave got it first they were mostly black, and now they are…. ”

“Pale blue or green.” Dave finished excitedly “You are right! Wonder that is about?”

“Perhaps how much power is left?” suggested Laura.

Jake nodded slowly “Maaaaybe. That might errr….. also explain why I stopped changing in the mall. “ he shrugged nervously ”I didn’t really think about it much – all I wanted was to get out as soon as possible. And it kinda slipped my mind afterwards. I didn’t really try to keep it secret, or anything. “ he took a deep breath ”Aaaanyway at the end I had to actually find stuff that fit me instead of my body molding itself to it like in the beginning. I think I finished changing when I came back here. Couldn’t say for sure because I was trying really hard not to chicken out off” he glanced towards Dave “… you know.”

A distracted “Hm.” was all the reaction Dave gave, as he pondered the implications if certain changes could only be sustained if the ring acted as a power supply. He’d had high hopes that giving Jake the ability to shapeshift was the first step to become independent from the demonic artifact. Laura continued to ask Jake some questions about his shapeshifting failing, but Dave was only half listening.

The trio spent the rest of the meal in idle speculation.

Dave had been waiting for an opportunity to have a private conversation with Laura, and when she sent Jake to clean the dishes to show that - Yes, he was still very much in the doghouse as far as she was concerned - Dave saw his opportunity.

“Hey mom.” he said softly to avoid Jake hearing him above the clatter of dishes “We need to rethink the whole punishment thing.”

She snorted “I noticed.” and got up to close the door connecting the dining/living-room to the kitchen, before joining Dave on the couch. “You can’t really think using him as guinea-pig is much of a punishment. Especially not when he gets Karate-lessons out of it..”.

”No.” Now it was Dave turn to give an amused snort “But having him gag internally every time he forces himself to ..err swallow, won’t either. He’ll just start resenting me and himself. And so will I, probably. Start hating myself for doing it, I mean.”

“Okay.” Laura admitted reluctantly, waiting for Dave to go on.

“But! But you were right when you said he could use a lesson on women. As I said, I had a long honest talk with him and…. ” Dave made a few vague gestures as he tried to find the right words “ Well he hasn’t been abused or anything. It is just that when he grew up his little sister got all the love and he couldn’t really win against his two elder sisters because they were smarter and stronger. And when he was stronger than them, he wasn’t allowed to hit them because they were girls. ”

He raised a hand to forestall his mothers comment “Look, like I said he wasn’t abused or anything. It’s just small stuff that accumulated, and now that’s the lens he sees the world through. Like seeing teachers take it easy on girls or feeling like he has to do all the work in courtship. Deep down he thinks women have all the power. ”

“But we don’t. I….” Laura scowled.

“I know. I know.” Dave tried to head off the incoming triade “That’s why I said some hands-on experience might do him good. As long as it doesn’t seem ….spiteful? Yeah spiteful fits. ”

“Hmmm.” His mother took the time to let Daves comments sink in, instead of venting about all the crap she went through because of her gender right away.

“So what do you propose?” she finally asked.

Dave looked towards the kitchen, where he could still here dishes clinking before shrugging “Nothing really. But we still have around half an hour to hammer out the basics, I think. Jake put you through that crap....”

"Language."

"Sorry. ...errr through _that _because he felt powerless aand saw a way to turn the tables. I think he'd need to have at least _some _say in the matter. So how about...."