Back of the cop car

Your wrist handcuffed, you sit in the back of the cop car. Your wet clothes are freezing. You shiver involuntarily to keep warm. You can’t believe it’s come to this. When the other inmates ask you what you’re in for, you’ll have to say “Dem Tiddies.” They won’t believe you, but if they saw them, they’d understand. They were so big and glorious. Your mouth waters remembering how to sucked them, trying to draw out milk even though there was no possibility those young tits were full of milk.

The door opens. The cop tells you “Get out.”

You obey. He spins you and unlocks your cuffs. “Your wife’s not pressing charges against her, and she’s not pressing charges against you even though her breasts look like a chewed up dog toy.” Then he gives you a fist bump, and whispers, “I would’ve done the same thing. Those are the definition of tig ol’ biddies.”

You walk over to your wife and sister-in-law. Both have their arms crossed. Your wife has a shiner under her eyes. Your sister-in-law’s cleavage is covered in hickeys and bite marks.

You apologize, “Sorry. I’m drunk. Things got out of hand. Seeing you drowning my wife set me off. Thanks for not pressing charges.”

“Having a micro-penis is punishment enough,” she smirks. She’s never going to let that go.

Your wife says, “Let’s go home, and forget this ever happened. I never want to talk about it again. I don’t even want to know how you two ended up in the fountain in your underwear.”

“Deal,” I say and look at your sister-in-law. “You don’t tell my brother about any of these.”

She gestures to her abused tits. “I’m sure he won’t have any questions about this.”

“Tell him you were abused by an octopus and a piranha,” I say.

“My husband won’t care as long as I tell him his dick is twice the size of his brother’s.”

“Twice the size!?” Your wife gasps, imagining such a monstrous cock.

“At least,” your sister-in-law smirks. “I have a pic of it on my phone. Want to see?”