Back in the cell

The all-too-familiar darkness enveloped me. I wanted to cry, and since nobody would see me and I had nothing better to do anyways, I did just that. The hot tears running down my face were actually a welcome distraction from not feeling anything at all, especially as they dripped down on my bare breasts and continued their way down my body.

‘A **** that can still beg has not been broken yet.’ What a stupid, cruel thing to say! And I wasn’t a ****!! Not yet anyways…

And could these damn humans please make up their minds for once?! Did they want us to beg or not?? They probably thought we should know when to beg and when not to… only that it was impossible to know that.

But all these angry thoughts were in reality just to distract myself from two, burning hot things in my mind: First, the way he acted, and the way he talked about ‘broken’ slaves, it was clear that he wasn’t actually ‘just’ interrogating me. He wanted to break me, to subdue me, to make me a mindless toy for him or even anyone to play with. A disgusting, terrorizing thought. But not as terrorizing as the other thing…

The incredibly strong drowsiness slowly crept up on me.

I had been tired the entire time the monster tortured me, sleep deprivation must be a part of his strategy. And now, after the **** and back in the dark sensory deprivation chamber again, it was a certainty that I would fall asleep eventually. Only to be woken up by electroshocks. What a lovely perspective.

I fought it as hard as I could, thinking about how angry I was at that damn monster, how I could resist him, or even escape. But it was a losing fight. And eventually, I drifted to sleep.

“Aaaarrrrrrggggghhhhhh!” I screamed into my gag as the first shocks woke me up. They were stronger and went on for longer this time. He must have increased the intensity to prevent me from getting used to the pain after he tortured me.

I sighed internally and tried my best to stay awake. Even though I knew that eventually, I wouldn’t be able to…

The cycle of trying (and failing) to stay awake, only to be woken up by painful electroshocks, continued. Sometimes, I almost felt as if the collar had allowed me some amount of sleep before it woke me up. Could the monster have a reason to grant me respite? I really doubt it.

After the third (or was it the fourth?) time I was woken up by electroshocks, I began hearing… things. It had never been completely quiet, to begin with. The earplugs only kept sounds out, they didn’t prevent me from hearing the sounds of my own body. The thumping of my heart. The rushing of my blood. The rasping of my breaths.

But now, I thought I could make out other sounds. The rasping breath of other people. Other demis.

It sounded as if they were locked in here, with me. But… that’s impossible, right? I am alone in this cell. I saw it before the monster closed the door and left me in the dark.

…

Could he… have put some more demis in here while I was ****? No, NO! that’s not possible. Stop thinking about this shit, girl! These sounds are nothing but hallucinations, they just have to be!

And yet, they continued to grow more intense…

I didn’t think I would ever be so glad to be blinded by the light of an opening door, especially when it announced another day full of ****. Like the last time, I had to squint, but I refused to close my eyes fully. I didn’t want to be in the dark for one more second than I had to. While the monster untied me, I looked around:

The cell was completely empty. Nothing in it besides me and a few stains from tears and sweat on the ground. Noticing my scared looks at what amounted to basically nothing, the monster almost unnoticeably raised an eyebrow.

Having undone my bindings, he slung me over his shoulder like last time. I knew that I should resist him, and be it only out of pride, but I didn’t. He would me take out of this cell, at least for a bit, and there was nothing I wanted more than that right now.

Again, I was tied to the hook in the tiled corner, forcing me on my tiptoes.

Again, the monster gently hosed me down with lukewarm water.

Again, I was made to stand in the middle of the room, still wet, the monster sitting on a stool.

“Kneel” he said.

And again, I refused.