As if! (Pink Trigger)

"Ha ha... You must be joking. I'm not so foolish as to provide you with yet another handicap, Erika. Let's see you handle this one with your wits, not with that authority you love so much."

Heh... I wonder if this is where I get to see Erika's sniveling face. It won't work, Erika; you see, I'm quite a bully when I want to be. No pink cheeks or tear-stained eyes or snotty nose is going to make me withdraw this move. In fact, if you beg me to withdraw it, that will only serve to give me an erection. I did so want to see her beg for it!

...

... That's not the face I was expecting to see...

"Oh? So I'm not the detective in this one? Is that your final answer, Mister Player?"

Shit... Uh... I wanted to take it back, but it's too late. A game master can't be so fickle. I decided to stick to my guns. That's correct, Erika... I've reduced you to a naked girl, huddled in the rain... no detective, but an unfortunate shipwreck victim about to be stumbled upon by the lewdest creature on the island. This might get a bit uncomfortable to watch, but I assure you that everything Piece Player does is out of love.

"I wonder...?" Erika spoke, taking another big sip of ramen noodles while her eyes smiled over the lip at me.

On the board, I, H.I. Player, moved through the rain towards the darkened beach. The storm was fierce by this point of the night, but I needed to search the beach once more, to see if any of my belongings had been swept up with me when I came here. I had some very valuable erotic literature when I fell overboard, dear fellow reader, and I can't afford to lose it-

Oh... What's this? I've found something far more interesting. I thought I'd accounted for every figure on Rokkenjima earlier, but here's another... Isn't this the most human figures that have ever existed within the Rokkenjima story? Fascinating...

But I'm much less interested about that than I am the state of the girl. She's completely naked! Her pure white skin looks precious, but she must be shivering with the cold... Ah... I must warm her with my love, immediately. I'll simply scoop her up and inspect her body to make sure she isn't injured.

Hm... I noticed she was cradling something close to her body. Could she be protecting some kind of toy? She really is like a little girl, though I for some reason suspect that she's 18 years old.

I was prepared to be surprised by whatever the young lady was holding, but I was not prepared for how she'd use it. Before I had a chance to even raise my hands to defend myself, the girl, wearing a vicious smile, swung the toolkit and clobbered me aside the head with it. My umbrella flew uselessly down the beach, whipped by the wind. She didn't chase it; she came right back after me as I turned and tried to run from her.

Shit! She threw it! I felt myself bleeding from two sides of the head. Now I really did raise my arms to try to muster some defense as the completely nude Erika crawled towards me, **** gleaming in her eyes. What is this bloodlust?! Is any human on Rokkenjima really a murderer like this?!

I just wanted to take you to the guest house, I swear!

Gugugugu... squish... splat. I was beaten senseless by that metal toolbox and murdered.

"Well? What do you think?"

What... What?! What do I think?! Why would Erika **** him?!

"Inconsequential. Simply by the existence of this toolbox you gifted her, this level of **** is possible for Furudo Erika!"

What the fuck?! But... Erika is... oh wait. She's not a detective this time. That awful girl, who could be voted most likely to kill even when she's a detective, has no excuse not to go on a killing spree when I've taken that role from her. But more importantly, I've made it so she doesn't even have to address whether my story is a mystery or an eroge... Without the shackles of the detective role, she can kill Piece Player and he can do nothing to retaliate...

Piece Player was dead. I felt the darkness begin to encroach on me as well, while Erika stood, took a small bow, and gave a little curtsy, wearing a smile that showed that she was satisfied with her own performance today. Erika's boasting was growing duller as I passed on, but I heard the witch's voice...

"Child of Man... You're very lucky I've allowed you to read erotica throughout this tale and not some well-written mystery. You're very poor at using your intuition in cases like these."

Shut up... I know that...

But my **** is certain. As long as I have my Pink Trigger, I'll return to challenge you, Erika. As stubborn opponents go, maybe we're made for each other...