Anniversaries and BBQs

The portal swirled to life like a whirlpool when a pair of figures stepped through, holding each other hand in hand as the first to step through was Reed Richards, the man blinking as he took in his surroundings with a surprise, just a split second after his wife joined him. The sky-blue skinned draenei woman ruffling her feathered wings behind her and pouting her lower lip as she took a step forward to give her brother, Ben, and his wife Alicia space to join them, along with their kids. All of whom stopped behind the couple after finding out where they were.

There standing before them was NOT the home of the Fantastic Four who invited them, instead they found themselves on the flight deck of the SHIELD helicarrier where a dozen armed guards approached them, the lead of which stopped just a meter from the family when he pulled up a clipboard, looking down at a checklist and back to the Four and their family.

“Are you Reed Richards and Susan Storm of… Universe 999?” Asked the SHIELD guard with a stern tone of voice.

Shifting their gaze between each other, Reed and Susan nodded slowly.

“Yes.”

“Yes, what of it?”

After the response, the agent checked off the list… And smiled, stepping to the side, and waving out over to the flight deck where the family could see that the flight deck had been left open for several chairs, tables and barbeque pits set up for cooking. Dozens of SHIELD staff in a more ceremonial garb stood around the tables serving the guests or were cooking food for everyone. They were rather impressed with the sight and lit up into a smile when they noticed a VERY familiar family that looked like them wave them over to a table.

“Welcome aboard the Helicarrier Mr. and Mrs. Richards, will you be having beef or chicken for the meal today?”

Looking out to the flight deck as they descended the platform from the portal behind them, they could see several versions of their family sitting around the tables chatting and laughing, a few others were meeting each other for the first time and breaking the ice while the kids chased each other in circles between the tables.

Blinking back at the arrangement, Ben Grimm clutched at his wife’s hand and looked to one of the random SHIELD staff.

“You got anything kosher on the menu? Maybe some turkey dogs?”

Heading their way to one of the tables, the Invisible Woman sitting amongst the rest of the guests got up and approached the married couple with arms open wide to embrace them both. Her husband right behind her shaking the hand of his counterpart as they all greeted one another and chose a space to sit. Joining several other Reeds and Susans and Johnnys and Bens at the collection of foldout tables.

“Welcome to the party you two, you’re right on time.” The Invisible Woman smiled as she sat and playfully bumped her elbow towards Reed who sat next to an albino version of her wearing a lovely white dress. The pale skinned woman resting her head on Reed’s shoulder while the others greeted the winged draenai woman and her husband.

“It’s wonderful to see you all again.” She smiled; her hands folded in front of her. Then her attention fell to a trio of Susan Storms she did not recognise. “And some of you are new.”

“Oh yes. I want you to meet a few newcomers to the party.” Explained the Invisible Woman, waving over to the trio sitting at the same table in their lonesome but were still delighted to be with the others. “This is Lady Anti-Venom, Moon Dame and Daredevil.”

“Charmed.” Waved the blind woman, taking a sip of her drink.

“My goodness, is that a symbiote?” Asked the Reed sitting with the horned woman, adjusting his glasses.

“Don’t worry, its tame.” Lady Anti-Venom answered back, picking at a bowl of chocolates at her plate. “But its got a bit of a sweet tooth though.”

“You two should try the burgers they got cooking on the grill.” Chirped the tentacle haired woman, returning with a plate of hamburgers and fries in one of her four hands, the others holding drinks and utensils as she sat next to her husband and pecked him a kiss over the forehead. Her husband sat next to her with a toddler in his arms sleeping while the rest of their children played with the Franklins and Valeria’s meeting each other on the flight deck and seats.

“Yeah, they’ve been cooking like crazy since we got here.” Chuckled Johnny with his mouth full and getting a slap on the back from one of the Bens there. Eliciting a riot of laughter from the rest of the Ben Grimms present when they caught him coughing and spitting up his burger.

“Chew Johnny, chew.” Snorted the wendigo version of Susan Storm, her hand covering her fanged smirk as she watched the variant of her brother catch his breath and getting a drink. “Seriously though, the food is good. Try the chicken if you get a chance.”

“YES, thank you. I didn’t think we were having the barbeque here of all places.” The horned, angelic looking woman stated, seeing the rest of her variants sitting and talking to one another. Catching up on each other’s lives over the last year. The rest of the Johnnys were showing off or sharing stories about their stunt careers. And the Bens sat nearby either sharing a laugh or arm wrestling together with their wives Alicia and kids talked about their school or artwork. It was rather quite pleasant, but a question nagged the former succubus.

“So, what happened? Why here and not at your home? Did you two lose a bet or something?”

“Yeah Suzie.” Snorted the tall wendigo woman flicking her feline tail behind her while biting into half a grilled chicken like it was a sandwich. “Spill the deets.”

Squeamish to answer, Reed took the helm and explained the matter, adjusting his glasses as he did so.

“There was a bit of a squabble with a group of Susan’s variants that showed up unannounced at our home, after they were dealt with and sent back to their home dimensions, the director thought it best that the dimensional portal be in his safe keepings instead of our own. To avoid any future incursions.”

“Were they anything like that bitch in BDSM gear last year?” Asked the holographic Susan, the pearl blue sports car behind her amongst other vehicles revving her engine as the holographic projection flickered for a split second. “Because SHE was a handful!”

Crossing her arms and looking away with a huff, the body language was all the other Susans there needed to know about the affair.

“Ugh… Good riddance.” Snorted the alien looking version of Susan. “THAT woman was a piece of work.”

Daredevil raised her hand with a quirk of her eyebrow. “What’s this about BDSM?”

“It was a phase…” Moon Dame silently answered, sipping from her drink.

For a moment the families there chuckled and continued to chatter when the Invisible Woman noticed something around Moon Dame’s neck. “What are you wearing there?”

Looking down at the necklace, the tan skinned woman gently looped a finger around one of the rings hanging from the string, a wistful smile on her lips as she clutched it fondly. “This was on the demon’s neck. A monstrous tally of all the Reed Richards she had killed on her journey across the multi-verse.”

Wincing at that, Susan found the woman smiling softly as she pulled it back into her tunic and patted it under her clothes for its own safety.

“With me, they’ll find the peace they rightfully deserve. Instead of in the hands of a monster wearing our face. They will know where ever they are now that they have been avenged.”

Reaching out to the woman, Susan rested a hand over hers. “Thank you.”

Watching the group of Fantastic Four variants continue to enjoy their meal together, Nick Fury sat at a nearby table with Maria Hill, eating their own offered food as they watched more variants of the Four arrive through the portal, each stranger than the next as they joined the others, greeting, laughing and either playing music to start dancing at the center of the flight deck or go to the tables where food was being served. Seeing all this, the director looked nonplus about the whole affair. Such that Maria leaned in to whisper to the SHIELD director with a concerned look on her face.

“Is it really wise to honour this kind of arrangement director? This is the kind of thing we were trying to avoid.”

“On any other occasion I’d agree with you Miss Hill, but not today.” The man answered, taking a bite of his grilled chicken and roast potatoes served by the ship’s mess hall. “This was a bit of a wake-up call for us in how we handle these super powered groups. The Susan Storms we dealt with came from worlds where their version of SHIELD mishandled their presence on a deeply troubling level. I see that now.”

“So what? Are we going to rent out a government funded flying warship to the Richards family whenever they want a party or birthday to celebrate?”

“HARDLY!” Scoffed the man, taking a bite of the roast potatoes on his plate. “The portal device is safely under our supervision from here on end, and if the price is to hold an annual barbeque for an extended family for 1 day of the year, I think our ship’s mess hall can handle it. Besides… Take a look over there.”

Seeing where the director pointed with his fork, she could see the Richards family chatting away, or ate the offered food their mess hall cooked, or in the case of the children played with one another. But THAT was not the main focus of the man’s attention. There, Maria spotted the group of Reed Richards from across the multi-verse sitting together trading notes and even sharing blueprints with each other over food and drink.

“There, right there is the greatest think tank the multi-verse has to offer! Ideas, inventions, and devices yet to be discovered or thought of sitting on our flight deck trading over fountain drinks and hot dogs. That multi-armed menace of a woman had the right idea but the wrong way to profit off it. You don’t steal from these people Maria; instead, you sit next to them while eavesdropping on the greatest scientific minds in all reality and try to keep up with the conversation while you record it all.”

Taking another bite of his chicken and ignoring the cheers the group of Ben Grimms gave when one of them lost to the other in an arm wrestle, Fury nodded to his right-hand woman.

“Next year when we host this again, I want you to compile a list of the greatest scientific minds we have in our pocket to show up and record everything they can understand and even the stuff they can’t.”

“Yes SIR!” Maria saluted and got up from her chair, heading back into the Helicarrier interior to do just that.

“And Hill?” Seeing her stop at the bulkhead door, Fury called out to her. “Tell them it’s a potluck; we’re not running a bar and grill out here.”

“Yes sir.”

Seeing the woman leave, Fury went back to his meal, keeping a sharp eye at the dancing couples, the crowd of children at a nearby table playing games, the collection of fiery hotheads show-boating and the stone skinned pilots drinking and cheering… And the veritable goldmine of information his associates could profit from by just being within earshot of them all. Oh yes, this was a very profitable agreement. And all he had to do was sit back and wait to reap the rewards.

***

“YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE YOU CAN CONTAIN ME?!” Screamed the blonde woman, fighting against the bars of her cage in impotent rage. Her inhibitor collar prevented her from using her powers and giving her electric shocks every time she even tried to tug at it to loosen the grip, leaving her as just a normal woman wringing her gloved hands around her iron bars. Staring down at the creatures that guarded her. “I AM SUSAN STORM! DOCTOR OCTOPUS! THE MASTER PLANNER! THE GREATEST INTERDIMENSIONAL THIEF THIS MULTI-VERSE HAS EVER KNOWN!!! YOU’LL REGRET WHAT YOU’VE DONE HERE YOU DOLTISH PERVERSIONS FOR MINIONS!”

“Save your breath…” Sighed a voice near her cage, garnering the attention of the woman as she looked to her cellmate. The man looked… Haggard, unkempt but well taken care of. “Just because you look like my wife, doesn’t mean they’ll answer to you. They used to answer to me for the longest time, but not anymore…”

Leaning back in her cage and crossing her arms in frustration, Susan gave the bearded man the cell over a scathing look. “Your wife hmm? Well, obviously she upgraded if you’re in a birdcage for her amusement.”

“So sings the canary next to me.” The man snorted, narrowing his eyes. “So I take it you are from another reality, and you were bad enough that sending you home was not a better option then being sent to my wife’s throne room.”

Smirking devilishly, the woman rested her fingers over her chest in mock admiration. “Where I’M from I am the master planner! On MY world I could do whatever I wanted, and the multi-verse was at my finger tips.”

Reaching out with her outstretched hand, she stretched her fingers over an overhead light source, showing it blot out the light it gave off as she pretended to grasp it.

“The POWER of all reality and creation within the palm of my hand… “

“And now you are here. Outsmarted and outplayed by a version of you who would rather play homemaker than world ruler.”

“THEY DID NOT OUTSMART ME! MY PLANS WERE PERFECT! They… They were lucky!” Sneering, Susan sat on her knees and gripped the iron bars in front of her.

“Just WHO are you really? Why did that monstrous whore decide to bunk me next to another Reed Richards?”

Sitting up, the man gripped his own iron bars in the same gesture, glaring back at the woman.

“Because THIS Reed Richards was the ruler of all! Every word I spoke to my subjects was law, every whim and gesture I made was manifest in the world around me! I was the conqueror of this world!”

“And now you’re a pet hamster for a freakshow you used to call your wife… Seems you and I have something in common.”

Leaning back in his cage, Reed Richards sighed and looked away. “Hardly…” Thumbing the collar around his neck, the man glared back at her, eyeing her own collar. “You’re a thief, I am a conqueror of worlds! Had I the means, all of reality would be under my thumb.”

Narrowing her eyes and smirking, Susan sat up and leaned forward. “Is that so? Well then, it would appear for now we’re bedfellows in this prison. I could use a hand getting out.”

Raising an eyebrow, Reed looked almost surprised by the declaration. “And what makes you think we’ll be getting out any time soon?”

Leaning back in her cell and folding her hands over her knee, Susan Storm tilted her head back and grinned back at the man.

“I have a plan…”

The end?