Amanda Thinks Logically

Lights out. In bed together. I make a move. Amanda blocks me.

Her eyebrows were knotted in concentration.

“You’re thinking,” I stated.

“Just walking through my kata:

“Current situation: Great sex with a young man I care about.

“I just can’t define a future situation with you.”

She stopped me before I could say ‘marriage and kids’.

“I’m just thinking of introducing you to my mom: this is an 18 year old I’m dating. Oh and right before we starting dating he fucked your niece Deb while her husband watched. Oh and before that he fucked 56 other women.”

“You don’t have to tell her that. I won’t tell people your age.”

“Because I’m old. It’s embarrassing. You have to admit it.”

“Age is just a number,” I lied. I wanted it to work, but I knew the hill was too steep.

Amanda groans, “I don’t know what our future should look like and I sure as hell don’t want to think about your past. I can bare living in the moment when you but when I stop to think my mind is going crazy.”

She turns to me, “Before me who did you last have sex with.”

“Uh…”

“Don’t lie! Tell me.”

“Maggie,” I spit out.

Her eyes widen enough I can see the whites in them. “In the dirty motel room!? You fucked her on the same bed, we made love in the night before!?”

I stuttered. How could I explain it wasn’t my fault? My dick had a mind of its own and it was addicted to the feeling of pussy. If pussy was offered, it was going to accept. My own mind was detached from that sex, it’s like it wasn’t happening.

It sounded so ridiculous in my head. I didn’t say it. “Yeah. She wanted payment for bringing my stuff.”

“So you fucked her!?” Amanda is out of bed. “I knew you were young and irrational, but seriously. I was out getting us a cabin and you fucked a girl in a bed that I was paying for. Right after saying how much you loved me. This is so much more fucked than my ex. At least he knew I was a thousand miles away, and wouldn’t open the door at any minute.”

She packed her stuff. She wouldn’t listen to me. She was done with this cabin. Done with the 18 year old and the cock he couldn’t control.

Packed up the car.

“Where are you taking me?” I’ve never felt more like a child. Completely hopeless and completely responsible for the consequences.

“I’ll drop you off at the bus station. Enough money to get back to the cornfields. Go to church: relearn that lying is a sin.”

She was humiliated. She just went from a cheating fiancé to a cheating 18 year old. I couldn’t argue with her. The week in the cabin seemed naive.

Just an excuse to have as much sex as possible before she realized how awful I was.

She stopped at a country store to fill her BMW up with gas. I went inside, only to be away from her and her sad angry eyes.

Walking through the short aisles, I was attacked. A little kola jumped and latched itself onto me. The weight pulled me down, but I kept my feet.

A familiar Mainer voice said, “Oh my god. I thought I’d nevah see you again.”

“Sorry. I didn’t say goodbye Cass,” I said hugging her.

She looked different outside of her camp uniform. She actually looked feminine. I asked, “Goin somewhere on a Friday night.”

“Yeah. There’s a house party down the road.”

“You bringing a date?”

She laughed, “Not unless you want to come.”

I glanced out the window at the angry brunette, then back at the smiling petite Mainer. “I’ll come.”

She grinned in total surprised, “Wicked. Let me just buy this beer, and we’ll hit the road.”

“Sounds good. Let me just tell my ride they can leave.”

I stepped outside the country store. Amanda sat impatiently inside the BMW, revving the door engine.

“Get in.”

I bent down and stuck my head in the window. Pulled out my one duffle bag of belongings. “You can go without me. I’ll be fine. I came out here alone. I’m not going back. I’ll survive.”

“Don’t be stupid. You have no job. No home. No money. You’re homeless in a state where there’s not even enough traffic to panhandle.”

I shrugged, “I’m fine with the unknown. I love you. You deserve better.”

I left the white BMW and the goddess inside.

I climbed into the rusty pickup of my hick best friend. I smacked the dashboard. “Let’s get this party started.”

She looked at me, “Rule #1 you are not fooling around with any of the bitches at this party tonight. They’re nasty.”

I winked at her, “Can I fool around with you?”

I actually made the tough little woman blush. It was confirmed she did have a crush on me. And my dick hadn’t gotten wet in a day.

Time to get back to the way life should be.