A short dark haired woman

You approach a short, trim dark haired woman. She's very pretty, in a "not letting go of my youth" kind of way. She's very tan, almost too tan, and tiny, and trim to almost Madonna standards, and is wearing rather too much make up in a style that's at least five years out of fashion, and she grins at you as you draw close, displaying a slightly unnerving amount of large, unnaturally white teeth.

"Have you ever had a girl fuck you with a carrot?" she asks conversationally, not looking up from the vegetables.