A scepter that destroys clothes

“Huh, this place is lively today,” Kim commented, noting the unusual amount of bustle in the campus. She stood in the open, as she was wearing a somewhat concealing outfit for a change. Kim wore a potato sack with holes cut into its sides to allow her limbs to pass through.

The elves around her were wearing clothes made out of leaves and flowers. Well, except for the exhibitionist that only wore three strategically placed fig leaves, but hey, every campus has one.

“Yep, today is a special day for two reasons!” Taggie said. “First, it’s Wood Elf Memorial Day, which is why everyone’s wearing their traditional attire.”

A gale blew across the meadow, lifting the skirts of a whole line of elves. They all squealed and tried to push down against it. Kim raised her eyebrows. That was a whole lot of elven butt. “And apparently, underwear is not part the Wood Elf wardrobe. But why are you two wearing those Zelda tunics?”

“What is a Zelda?” Delphi asked, stretching her green tunic with curiosity.

“Well, we don’t have anything else to wear. But we are still going commando like all the other elves, so it still counts as a Wood Elf dress?” Taggie shrugged.

“Right... But why is everyone so agitated? What’s with the podium and the crowd?”

“Today is also election day! We chose one of our peers to become headmaster or headmistress for the coming year.”

“You elect your headmistress from among the students? Don’t you need to have at least a PHD to become head of a college?”

“Everyone here has at least one Ph.D., and titles you humans don’t even have names for.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize.”

“What do you think we do here all day, prance in the forest? Hell, half the students moonlight as teachers for a class or two! Even I used to teach herbology back in the day… until I got bored of it.”

“You mean because you got into a fight with your students.” Delphi sighed. “If you put a bunch of centuries-old elven scholars in a room, the only they’ll agree on is that everyone else in the room is an idiot. So, how do we decide who’s in charge without getting into another all-out brawl on the campus?”

Kim narrowed her eyes. “With an election, I get it. Although it sounds more like a popularity contest to me. Let me guess, that’s why you want this Scepter of Autumn, as some sort of scheme to become headmistress.”

Taggie shook her head. “Eh, not really. Been headmistress a couple of times, terribly boring job, it is.”

“Really? You? The elf that introduced herself as a member of the loser’s club?”

“We’ve been here a long time, human. Everyone has been elected at least once. Except for Delphi.” Taggie hugged Delphi, a purple blush appeared on her blue cheeks. “…for now! But that’s not what we are going to try here today.”

“Why do you want this thing for then?”

“Give me the scepter, and you’ll find out.” Taggie winked.

Kim tossed an Egyptian-looking rod to Taggie. “Fine, take it, but I’m warning you. We still haven’t received payment for the last three items. VIP or not, you better start paying up. Trust me. You don’t want to owe anything to the boss.”

“Relax, you’ll get your money soon as we work up the nerve to do...” Taggie exhaled with pain. “...the queues. Why don’t you stick around? You’ll have quite the show.”