A deadly dilemma

For the first time in ages, Marcie Ross found herself wishing that she actually was invisible. At least, that way she didn't have to worry about the blonde woman who was the 1860 version of Darla firing a crossbow bolt into her chest.

Yet it wasn't as if Marcie was completely unarmed. She too had a crossbow, which she was aiming in Darla's direction. She had a stake tucked quite neatly in her garter. She had a small pistol -- loaded with silver bullets yet -- in an ankle holster on one leg and a flare pistol in another ankle holster on the other leg. (Marcie knew full well that vampires like Darla were bulletproof but they weren't necessarily fireproof.) And in the little handbag that Marcie had attached to her by a shoulder strap, Marcie had a little surprise that neither Darla nor Angelus could possibly anticipate in 1860. Heck, if it had been possible, Marcie would have brought along a flamethrower as well.

Yet, none of that was any help as long as a naked future Rose Tyler was in the way. Future Rose had apparently been so excited to see a familiar face that she failed to pick up on any sign that the woman in red whom she was embracing was not the same woman she had known as "Grandmother" back in the TARDIS. Well, in a way, it was the same woman -- only this version did not know Rose Tyler at all. This was Darla of the past, the one who helped Angelus track down the younger version of the woman Marcie called Empress and then helped him turn her into a vampire. And ironically, that same woman -- who apparently went by the name Drusilla in her younger -- more human -- days -- was standing behind her, watching in shock as Marcie and Darla aimed weapons at each other.

"Who is that woman?" asked Drusilla. "Why does your Rose seem to know her? And why is she calling her Grandmother? She's not old enough --"

"She's older than she looks, Drusilla," said Marcie. "And she's come here with her boyfriend Angelus to kill you and your family. So if you value your safety and the safety of your family, please leave now. I'll do what I can to hold her off but you have to leave now."

"That's right!" exclaimed the 1860 version of Darla. "Make them run. Angelus likes it when they run. And it's almost sunset. Which means he'll be here soon. I guess that's what you people get for having the audacity to attend an afternoon Mass."

"Grandmother," said future Rose with a confused expression on her face. "Why are you talking like that? You never talked like that before."

"She's not the same person you knew before, Rose," said Marcie. "Now step away from her so I can get a clear shot."

"No, Marcie -- I mean, Cordelia," said future Rose. "I won't let you shoot Grandmother. I just won't. I thought you two were friends."

"She's not my friend, Rose," said Marcie. "She's the Empress's friend. And even at that, they have quite a complicated history. Anyway, step away from her. She's bad news."

"No!" cried future Rose.

"Move!" cried Marcie.

"I won't move!" cried future Rose. "I won't. I know what will happen the minute I do. You'll kill Grandmother. Well, I won't allow that."

Then a voice from behind Marcie said, "Come here, Rose. Your Mistress demands it."

And just like that, a naked future Rose scurried away from Darla and toward the figure who spoke. A figure who looked like -- wait -- Drusilla?

Marcie was so startled that she forgot to take her shot. Darla was surprised too. And she lowered her crossbow just a little bit as she stared at the departing future Rose Tyler.

Granted, Rose's naked backside is interesting, thought Marcie, but it's not that interesting.

But at least it was interesting enough to distract Darla. Which was all Marcie needed.

Marcie took her shot. But the crossbow bolt she fired only hit Darla in the chest. Judging from the smirk on Darla's face -- and the fact that she did not instantly turn to dust -- it must have missed her heart by at least a few inches.

Oh, well, thought Marcie. There's still time for a second shot.

But before Marcie could reload her crossbow, a naked future Rose Tyler jumped right on top of her.