A couple by the cafe

George lumbered down the sidewalk, his ill-fitting suit straining at the buttons as he wiped sweat from his forehead. The summer evening was warm, and despite having just "completed an inspection", he felt the familiar stirring of desire as he passed a trendy outdoor café.

His eyes immediately locked onto a stunning brunette sitting with a well-dressed man. She wore a form-fitting emerald dress that accentuated her curves, and her laughter carried across the patio as she touched her companion's hand. George's mouth watered as he observed her red-painted lips sip champagne, imagining them wrapped around his unwashed member instead.

"Perfect," he muttered, adjusting his crooked tie and slicking back his greasy hair.

The couple looked happy—genuinely in love—which made George's cock twitch with anticipation. There was something particularly satisfying about destroying that kind of happiness, about making a woman who thought she was loyal do the most degrading things imaginable while her partner watched in horror and confusion.

George approached with practiced confidence, pulling out the fake badge he'd created after discovering his strange powers. It looked official enough with its embossed gold shield and the words "BUREAU OF RELATIONSHIP FIDELITY" stamped across the top.

"Good evening," he announced, flashing the badge. "George Harker, Certified Infidelity Inspector."

The couple looked up, startled by the interruption. The woman—mid-twenties, with almond-shaped eyes and olive skin—furrowed her brow in confusion. The man—tall, athletic, probably worked out regularly unlike George's flabby frame—straightened in his chair.

"I'm sorry, what?" the man asked.

George cleared his throat, savoring the moment before the bullshit began to work its magic. "Infidelity Inspector. I'm with the Bureau of Relationship Fidelity. We conduct random screenings of couples to determine fidelity probability indexes."

The man frowned. "I've never heard of—"

"It's a relatively new program," George interrupted, his powers already weaving their invisible influence. "Initiated after studies showed that 78% of relationship dissatisfaction stems from unreported infidelity tendencies."

The woman shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "This seems very strange."

"Melissa," the man said, turning to his partner, "maybe we should hear him out. If it's a government program..."

George suppressed a smile. It was working already. The suggestion that this was somehow official, combined with his supernatural ability to make people believe his absurd claims, was taking hold.

"Precisely, sir. Mr...?"

"Daniel. Daniel Westfield."

"And you must be Mrs. Westfield?" George asked, eyeing Melissa hungrily.

"No, we're not married," she replied, still wary. "Melissa Reyes."

"Dating for three years," Daniel added. "We were actually celebrating our anniversary tonight."

"Perfect timing," George said, pulling up a chair uninvited and sitting down, his wide ass barely fitting in the bistro seat. "Anniversary milestones are when latent infidelity tendencies commonly manifest. The inspection is completely free of charge."

Daniel seemed to be considering it, while Melissa looked increasingly uncomfortable.

"What exactly does this... inspection involve?" she asked, her voice tight.

George leaned forward, his meaty forearms resting on the white tablecloth. "A series of physical and psychological examinations designed to measure response to stimuli outside the primary relationship."

"Physical examinations?" Melissa's eyes widened.

"Nothing invasive," George lied smoothly. "Standard protocol. The process is completely professional and confidential." He pulled out a tablet with an official-looking form. "The results are provided immediately, giving couples peace of mind or early intervention opportunities."

Daniel nodded slowly, the supernatural persuasion clearly affecting his judgment. "That actually makes sense. We've been talking about moving in together, and I guess... it would be good to know if there are any concerns?"

"Daniel!" Melissa hissed, but her indignation was already tinged with doubt. George's power was working its way into her mind too, making her question whether this was indeed a legitimate procedure that normal couples underwent.

"Many couples appreciate the certainty," George said with a serious nod. "Especially before major commitments. The Bureau has prevented countless devastating divorces and breakups through early detection."

Daniel looked at Melissa. "What do you think? If it helps us move forward confidently..."

Melissa hesitated, then sighed. "I guess if it's a standard thing... but surely not here in the restaurant?"

George checked his watch. "I understand your concern, Ms. Reyes. We have a mobile testing facility parked nearby, or we could conduct the examination at your residence for maximum comfort."

"Our place is closer," Daniel said, already pulling out his wallet to pay the bill. "We're over on Briarwood Avenue."

"Perfect," George said, barely containing his excitement as he imagined defiling Melissa in the couple's own home. "I'll follow you there."