A Pervert

At least, she looked like a pervert.

She was young and totally naked with glowing fair skin, hair as white as bright snow, and eyes that shone in gold.

The youth today has no shame, thought Reader.

He still ogled the hell out of her pink nipples though.

The pervert chick smirked. “Says the dirty old man who’s banging his benefactor’s daughter,” she said, as if having read Reader’s thoughts.

The face of that woman who was 20 years his junior who tried to help him when he had collapsed suddenly flashed before his eyes. Her name was Daphne. Reader was only close to Daphne to get into her 25-year-old daughter’s panties. And he had successfully done so. Again and again.

Reader sighed. He wished he had died while hosing his sperm into Daphne’s daughter’s vajayjay one more time instead of kicking the bucket on a stupid hike. Sure he loved that trail, but only because he had brought so many women up there to bang. And they never say no when they were on that trail. Not when they were so far from civilization. Y’know, because of the IMPLICATION.

“W-wait!” Reader said to the naked girl, “How did you know that?”

The naked girl sighed. “Let’s cut the crap you old lecher. You’re dead and due to be reincarnated in another world. I’m a goddess who needs something done in that other world. We should make a deal.”

“Goddess? Other world? This sounds a lot like the isekai shit that Daphne’s son loves so much. I tend to browse his comic books while I was taking a break from fucking his sister,” says Reader.

“Hrmph,” said the nude Goddess. “Is that why your name is Reader? You read other people’s stuff?”

“Nah. It’s just a cool name I use to pique the interest of the ladies when I introduce myself. It’s a great conversation starter,” said Reader.

“You really are an incorrigible dirty old man, aren’t you?”

Reader shrugged. “When you get to my age missy, you’ll tend to feel that being corrigible is basically overrated.”

“I’m 100,000 years old…” says the Goddess.

“Holy fuck, what’s your skincare routine?” Asked Reader.

The Goddess sighed. “I assume that since you’ve read all about it in uh… comic books, you’ll at least have some knowledge of what this entails?

“Yeah, somewhat I guess,” said Reader, “I get some magic powers and shit and go to this other world and become a hero to defeat the evil demon/darklord/king/emperor/god, and get a harem of girls in the process.”

“Ah good,” said the Goddess, “So you’ve somewhat got the gist.”

“Holy shit, are you telling me that the little shut-in loser’s fantasies were all for real?”

The Goddess sighed again. “Well, it used to be. But there’s been a change in management, so no, we’re not doing that shit anymore. I mean, I honestly can’t believe what the previous management was thinking either. Giving a person free perks just because he has a sob story and got hit by a truck? Jeezus, what are we? An after-world candy store?”

“I know right?” said Reader, “Oh noeeeessss… You didn’t like your hectic job but didn’t have the balls to pass your resume around and got hit by a truck, so now here’s some super powers because you know, feelings…”

“Haha! Exactly! Ridiculous right?” The Goddess replied, “Booohooohooo… You’re a shut-in social outcast with zero social skills and then you get hit by a truck. Poor baby… For your complete failure to develop basic human skills because of your own choice of hobbies, here’s a world where chicks fall over their skirts to cater to you, because you totally deserve it for some reason!”

“Bwahahahaha! Totally! Totally!” Said Reader, “Oh jeeez! My real life is soooooo stressful! All I want to do is live a relaxing life in the other world. Wish granted, but what’s this? A damsel in distress and a call to adventure which is definitely a direct pathway to more drama and a not-at-all a relaxing life? Sign me right up!”

“Gyahahahahaha,” The Goddess howled, falling backwards and rolling around on the ground, “Oh shit, I got one, I got one! Oooh look at me, I’m totally a good guy with modern progressive views. What’s up with this new world with its oppressive feudal-system nobility, xenophobic racism, and slavery? Sooo deplorable! But who’s my first companion? Oh, a demihuman who is totally my ****, but it’s okay cos I’m totally simping for her!”

“Lolololol,” Reader guffawed, sinking to his knees and slapping the floor with glee, “And who’s my second companion? Some feudal noble chick or a princess, but that’s okay, because she’s totally tsundere, and of course, I’m simping for her too!”

“Ohmaigod, ohhhh, stop, stop, stop, you’re killing me! Hahahahaha!” The Goddess wheezed on the floor.

The two of them rolled around on the ground until their giggles subsided.

Then they discovered that they were lying side by side with their heads turned towards each other. They stared at each other for a full minute.

“Hey Goddess, wanna fuck?” Asked Reader.

The Goddess shrugged. “Oh, okay,” she said curtly.

The two then leapt at each other and started fiercely making out. Then they had mad monkey sex all over the place.

“Pheeeew! I totally needed that,” panted the Goddess as Reader lay wheezing beside her.

“Aw man. You said there’s a new management. Does that mean I won’t get superpowers and babes now?” Asked Reader.

“Well, no. I’ve still summoned you here haven’t I? You see, we’re in somewhat of a cleanup mode after retiring the last administration. As such we still need agents to do our bidding in the worlds that the previous administration have fucked up on.”

“Right. I don’t care. Where the bitches at?”

“I’m getting to that. I need you to go to a world where the previous administration have been inserting many heroes in the past. You see, the heroes have been leaving descendants and it has created a race of unnatural beings, thus triggering a severe imbalance in that universe.”

“So you want me to kill them?”

“Yikes! No! I just want you to curb their spread and bring them to heel.”

Reader yawned. “No thanks. Sounds hard.”

“Thanks to the hero’s blessings in their blood, a lot of them are supremely beautiful women and girls,” said the Goddess.

“Yoshaaaa!!!” Reader roared, “What are you waiting for, send me down there already!”

“Ugh… so easy…” said the Goddess.