(Subplot) Lexie's Impulse Buy

Terry was admiring his latest acquisition proudly. He had loved collecting statues of animals ever since he was a child and had never really grown out of his hobby. When he had seen the plump, bespectacled toad staring at him from the shop window of the local charity shop he knew he had to have her. He had the perfect place in mind for her new home as well - on the stand his television rested on so she would be in his eyeline whenever he watched his favourite shows. She was joined there by a pig, a hedgehog and a duck.

For Tania, her view of a random man watching television, was not quite so appealing. Worse still, she was sitting directly opposite a mirror as a constant visual reminder of the humiliating trinket she had been reduced to. And the saddest part of it all, she couldn't even tell herself she didn't deserve it. This was more or less exactly what she had done to Lexie, and all in the hopes of impressing an evil and unhinged witch. She could only hope she would get out of this and have an opportunity to exercise better judgement around the glitches in future.

There was a ring on the doorbell. When Terry opened it, he nearly had a heart attack. There in front of him were standing four fully naked women. As someone who hadn't had sex since his divorce more than a decade ago, it was a lot to take in. Two of the women he recognised instantly - the very attractive middle aged woman who used to run the very same shop he had found his toad in earlier, and her pretty but lazy young assistant. The other two he didn't know - one looked like a K-Pop star and the other an Emo chick. Both were stunning.

"Um, ah...how can I help you ladies?" Terry began, trying desperately to keep his boner from being too obviously visible.

"It's Terry isn't it!" April smiled kindly "I remember you were a regular visitor to the shop when I worked there. Can we come in?"

Terry opened the door and let the four naked women walk through into his living room, which he really wished he had made more presentable that afternoon.

"There she is!" Chelsea pointed excitedly at the toad by the TV. This was her first time ever naked in public, or in a strangers house, and while the walk here hadn't been as mortifying as she might have imagined, she was still quite keen to get home.

"You see, there was a bit of a mix up" April tried to explain "That toad ornament you bought today, she actually wasn't for sale, she belongs with us in our home. But we will be more than happy to give you the money you paid for her back, plus a little extra for the inconvenience"

"That's very kind of you, but the fact of the matter is she was for sale and I bought her" Terry picked Tania up and admired her stone form "I've never seen one like this before. I think she may be one of a kind. The attention to detail is incredible, and her expression is almost like a human's!"

"Yes, it's a lovely toad for sure, but it's ours" Nari added "I understand this is an unfortunate mix up, but it has strong sentimental value to us"

"I'm sorry, but that isn't my problem" Terry doubled down "You can't just come into my home, demand I give you one of my treasured possessions and think I will do whatever you say just because you aren't wearing any clothes"

"But she won't be happy here, she'll be really bored" Chelsea added, not particularly helping the situation.

"Look, I've given you my answer and I'm not changing my mind. Now, I'm going to have to ask you all to leave"

"I'll give you ten thousand dollars for it" Lexie suddenly piped up "Or pounds, whatever"

"What? Are you serious?" the man looked genuinely taken aback.

"Yeah, fuck it" Lexie held up her phone "This is my mess, I'll fix it. Give me your bank details and I can transfer you the money now"

"Bloody hell" Terry looked like a man whose day was getting more surreal by the second "Ten thousand quid and she's yours!"

"I still can't believe you paid ten thousand pounds for Tania!" Chelsea laughed once the group were back at the mansion.

"Believe me, it wasn't on my bucket list" Lexie folded her arms and shook her head "But I've got more money than I know what to fucking do with after this TV deal anyway"

"So I suppose we should wait for Mel to get back to fix her" April looked down at Tania the toad who was sat on the coffee table in front of them "I'm not sure I feel confident to"

"Yeah, let's hope nothing happens during that promotional event to throw her off her game" Nari added.

"Hey, this is a weird text I just got from Barbs" Lexie was looking at her phone in confusion "Turn on Sports Main event now. Then, like, twenty exclamation marks"