"You're imagining things, Renji."

He's your fukutaichou, but you can't reveal anything to him. As your subordinate, you must keep a strictly professional relationship with him. It's impossible for you to let him any closer--not when you can't allow family to break through those carefully constructed walls. So you won't tell him anything because you simply can't tell him.

"You are imagining things, Renji," you reply, turning away to return to your cherry blossom watching.

"'Scuse me for sayin' so, but no, you're really not foolin' me."

You stiffen at that audacity of your fukutaichou as he moves closer, hands on yours, the heat radiating from them on this night sinking through the cloth covering the backs of yours right down to your very core. You've always known he was impulsive and he didn't tend to listen when you didn't specify your orders carefully, but you'd never thought he'd go this far... and a part of you likes it.

You like the fact that there's someone who isn't cowering away when you tell them there's nothing wrong, someone who persists for an answer.

"Lately, ever since this whole thing has quieted down, you've... well, you really haven't been here."

When you open your mouth to counter that with facts, he shakes his head and his chin falls on your shoulder. You tense visibly at your space being invaded by that overwhelming warmth, but don't pull away.

"I don't mean physically. I know you're here right now, but your mind's in another place. After the whole thing with Aizen, you never really got to settle down, huh? Never really got to come to terms with anything..."

Irritation rises. Nonsense. You have nothing to regret. You've come to terms with everything. Renji's reading too much into it. "Release me."

"It's okay to let it down. Ain't anyone gunna see here."

"Let go of me, Renji."