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What the Moon Hears, Part 2
The morning unfolded with a lazy grace, as if the hotelâs impossible climate had decided to do them a favor for once. The air was so clear it seemed to amplify every color: the greens of the Inner Garden were so sharp they felt like a challenge, the flowers bordered on neon, and even the pebble paths glittered, crusted with dew. Andy wandered those paths with his hands in his pockets, letting the quiet settle over him, the last crumbs of sleep still clinging to his mind.
Heâd expected to spend the morning alone, maybe just lose himself among the hedges and topiaries. Instead, he rounded a curve past a cluster of hummingbird feeders and nearly collided with Claire.
She stood perfectly still on the mossy walk, wearing sneakers, jeans and a white t-shirt that made her look younger, as if sheâd been waiting for him to pass that exact spot at that exact moment. Her cat-ears were half-flattened in focus, tail swishing rapidly, nervously, eyes luminous and intense. She looked at him, then flicked her gaze down to her notebook, already open and prepped.
She raised the pad. There was a page already written in her looping, meticulous hand that belied her obvious nervousness:
Want to go for a walk?
He smiled. âAlways.â
She seemed pleased by this, and her tail slowed down. She pointed with the notebook, gesturing deeper into the gardens, toward the east side where the bamboo grew so thick it was more like a living wall than a patch of stalks. Andy fell into step beside her, silent, letting her set the pace. The path narrowed here, the manicured lawns giving way to packed earth and the occasional stone, embedded like an accidental fossil.
Claire walked with a precision that was almost ceremonial, her hands clasped behind her back, tail balancing each slight turn in the path. He realized it was the first time since the transformation that he had the chance to observe how she had adapted to her cat-like tail and ears. They offered a window into how she was feeling, and she already seemed to own them.
Claire made no effort to fill the silence; she just moved, letting the rhythm of footsteps and wind take over. Her steps were utterly silent, and left little in the way of footprints; Andy wasnât sure how much of it was the effect of her cat-like transformation, and how much was simply Claire. He found himself slowing, breathing deeper, focusing on each step, as if matching her tempo would let him glimpse whatever she was seeing.
The deeper they went, the less the garden felt like a resort amenity and the more it became something sacred. The bamboo rose up in dense clusters, some stalks as thick as his wrist, others slender and swaying. The wind made the upper canopies hiss and sigh, and shafts of sun knifed down, dappled and bright, breaking the green with sudden pools of gold.
They rounded a bend and Andy spotted Erin leaning against a wooden fence post, arms folded and watching the sway of the tallest canes. She wore a battered t-shirt, hiking shorts, and zero expressionâuntil she caught sight of them. Her lips twitched. âYou made it,â she called, pretending not to notice the formality of Claireâs approach. There was a tremor of uncertainty in her voice. âWe thought youâd chicken out.â
âWe?â Andy echoed.
A low whistle sounded to their right, and Sam popped into view, perching on the railing like it was the edge of a skateboard ramp. âIntervention!â she sang, then made a face. âJust kidding. But we are kidnapping you for the next hour. No objections.â
Claire presented her notebook for a split second, the message clearly prepared in advance:
He will walk with us. He likes walks.
Sam whooped. Erin rolled her eyes but smiled, and Andy realized he had never seen these three women together, almost conspiratorially so. He was intrigued, now.
He let himself be swept along, the four of them winding through the groves, moving from light to shade and back again in slow pulses. Each of the women walked differently: Claireâs every step was measured, almost dancerly, and virtually soundless since her transformation; Erin stomped at first, but then loosened, her stride evening out, glancing back at Andy now and then as if to check he was still there; Sam drifted, sometimes out front, sometimes behind, pausing to poke at anything that looked remotely breakable. Twice, she snapped a bamboo stalk and tried to balance it on her nose.
Something was going on. The tension he had sensed around Erin and Claire in the Banquet Hall was still there, charging the air. âSo, why the bamboo?â Andy asked, as they reached a patch where the light was almost entirely filtered green.
Erin shrugged. âClaireâs idea. She wanted to see the new place Arabella unlocked. Also, she said it helps her think. I figured it couldnât hurt.â
Sam spun on her heel, walking backward, arms spread. âItâs very zen, Andy. If you breathe in at the same time as a bamboo grove sways, it, like, doubles your lifespan. Or turns you into a panda. I donât remember the science.â
Claire twitched. Andy saw her catâs ears flick, but she resisted the urge to edit Samâs biology on the spot.
They meandered for a while, following the winding trails, passing the occasional stone lantern or erotic statueânone as explicit as the ones in the private garden, but each still arresting in its own way. Andy found himself drawn to the sculptures, the way they both belonged and did not belong to the tranquility. He wondered if this was what the producers wanted, these little fragments of desire cropping up in a forest of discipline. He started feeling worried. Aside from Sam's quips, Erin and Claire were tense, and didn't really speak (or write, in Claire's case). They walked like women heading to the gallows.
The noise of the hotel faded. The only sound was the wind, the occasional thump of foot on dirt, and Samâs periodic commentary, most of which was designed to get a rise out of Erin, who pretended not to care.
At last, they reached a clearing. In the center, a stone bridge arched over a shallow, sparkling pond. The water was perfectly clear, and beneath the surface, a riot of koi flickered and twisted, their scales catching the filtered sun in flashes of orange, white, and black.
Claire stopped at the edge of the bridge and knelt to read a small plaque fixed to its side. She took a deep breath, spent a long moment with it, tracing the characters with her finger, then stepped onto the bridge and leaned over the rail, peering at the koi with unabashed fascination.
Sam joined her, arms draped over the side, grinning down at the fish. âIf you fall in, you get a free wish,â she said. âOr a fungus infection. Itâs a roll of the dice.â
Erin snorted, but her eyes were fixed on Andy. She jerked her head at the far side of the bridge, and he followed her, the two of them standing side by side at the apex, looking down at the world refracted through the water.
For a while, none of them spoke. She stood still, all the tension coming to the fore. Andy found his heart was thumping wildly in his chest. He wasn't sure he was prepared for what she was going to say.
Desperately, Andy watched the koi, and in their lazy, pointless circuit he felt something settle inside him. There was another plaque, half-hidden by the creeping ivy. The disquiet of the will cannot be wholely overcome unless natural desire is completely satisfied. He frowned. An odd quote, for a meditative bamboo grove. He let his hand dangle off the edge, the tips of his fingers nearly brushing the surface. The cold was a jolt, but it was also proof: he was here, and so were they.
He turned to Erin. âThanks for inviting me,â he said, soft.
She shrugged. âClaireâs idea. But Iâm not sorry.â
Sam, never far from the action, piped up. âWe like having you around, Andy. You make us seem normal by comparison.â
âThanks, love you too,â Andy replied, deadpan. He had never been more grateful for Sam's presence, breaking the tension.
Claire, standing very still at the opposite end, finally turned and walked to them. She had her notebook out, but instead of writing, she just held it, gaze locked on the pond.
She hesitated, then scribbled a line in hasty, scrawling script so unlike her looping handwriting, and handed it to Andy. He read:
When the water is still, you can see the bottom. Even if you donât like whatâs down there.
He smiled, not because it was funny, but because it was so perfectly her. âYeah,â he said. âI get it.â
They stood that way for a long time, the four of them arrayed along the bridge, each in their own thoughts.
It was Erin who cracked the thin ice of silence that had formed over them in the wake of Claireâs last note. She didnât do it with the practiced subtlety of a therapist, or the practiced aggression of someone who liked being the center of attention, but with her brand of brittle honesty that Andy had always respected, even when it made him want to crawl under a rock.
She took a long inhale, and Andy could see the muscle in her jaw flex as she did. Then, still studying the koi as if one of them might leap out and give her the words she needed, she said, âWe wanted to talk to you.â
A beat, maybe two, then Sam piped up from her end of the bridge. âCorrection: They wanted to talk to you. I just came for the pond and the possibility of someone falling in. But now that weâre here, Iâm happy to offer color commentary.â
Claireâs mouth twitched in something approaching a nervous smile. She nodded, flicking her tail to the side to punctuate the point.
Andy tried to play it cool, but he could feel his pulse climbing, and he had to rub at the inside of his elbow to get the nervous energy under control. âOkay,â he said, giving Erin the look. âI'm listening.â
Erin took a few seconds, then, still without meeting his eyes, said, âI donât really know how to say this without sounding like a jerk. Or like I think the world revolves around me.â
Sam leaned in, dramatic. âYou want to jump his bones repeatedly but youâre afraid itâll mess up the friend group?â She grinned wide.
Erin let out a tight breath and, to Andyâs surprise, didnât deny it at all. âIâm not the only one,â she managed between clenched teeth. âBut, yeah. Thatâs part of it.â
Andy felt a strange collision of panic and relief, like discovering there was no monster under the bed, but also realizing your bed was on fire. He tried to sound gentle, and maybe a little amused. âYou could have just said so,â he murmured.
âI didnât want to be the one to say it,â Erin said, finally turning to face him. Her eyes were steady, but there was a tremor in the set of her mouth. âI guess I thought if I waited long enough, someone else would.â
Claire took the opening. She stepped forward, her notebook already poised, and handed it to Andy. This time the message was nothing fancy, just a few words, large and deliberate:
Also. Me too. The bones thing. Sam explained.
He felt the impact like a physical thing, his throat tightening. He looked at Claire, then at Erin, then at Sam, unsure what to say that would be true and kind and not a complete disaster.
Sam rolled her eyes again, but her smile was softer now, less weaponized. âThis is honestly the worst intervention Iâve ever attended. Zero baked goods. Not even a juice box.â
Claire blinked, but quickly ducked her head and scrawled something more, shyly.
Itâs okay if you donât. I just didnât want to hide it.
Andy wasnât sure whether to hug her or run away. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and stared down at the pond, letting the cold air anchor him. âItâs not that I donât,â he said, voice almost lost in the bamboo hush. âItâs just⌠I care about you both. A lot. But Iâm not sure Iâm⌠good at this. Or that itâs fair to anyone, after...â He didnât finish the sentence.
He was so sure theyâd be disappointed, or worse, that theyâd see the mess inside him and walk away. Instead, all three just stood there, neither moving toward him nor away, as if the bridge was a kind of neutral turf where confessions could be made safely.
For a second, Andy looked up and caught Samâs eye. She was the only one who was smiling. He tried to force a grin of his own, but it felt lopsided. She said, âWe all need to get over ourselves, is my professional diagnosis. This is the hand we've been dealt. And it's not all bad, is it? But youâre not obligated to fix everything, Andy. Thatâs not the job. Thatâs not even this showâs job.â
âI know,â he said, but it sounded hollow.
Erin exhaled, her arms wrapping around herself. âItâs justâsometimes I want to be close to you, and I donât want to feel bad about it anymore.â
Claire nodded, scribbling:
I want to be close to you, too. You are the only one who makes me feel like I am not a mess.
Andy read that, and for a weird moment the pressure in his chest loosened. He looked at the two women. âYou... you're not asking me to choose, are you?â
Erin bit her lip, glancing at Sam. The blue-haired barista sighed. âNo, they aren't. They talked it out. Mostly. Even if they're being chickens right now.â
Claire scrawled:
We can share. We want to try. We understand the rules, but we want however much of you you can share.
Andy looked at Erin, and she gave him a tight nod. When he spoke, he felt his voice sounded more like a croak. âI donât know if I can promise I wonât make everything weird,â he said. âBut I want to try.â
Erin made a noise, somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. âThatâs the most honest thing youâve said today.â
âThank you,â Andy replied.
Claire, emboldened, took a step closer. She held up the notebook, a new line below the old ones:
Letâs just be together. Boyfriend and girlfriends. Is that okay?
He nodded numbly. He felt like a piece of meat the girls were carving up, and was surprised to realize he didn't mind at all. Claireâs message reminded him of high school, âdo you want to be my girlfriend?â With a start, he remembered he had once slipped one such message to her, long ago. He wondered if this was her answer, eleven years later.
Sam, never one to let a moment breathe for too long, said, âOkay, this was nice, and congratulations to you three lovebirds, but if no oneâs going to jump in the pond, can we at least go find some snacks? Iâm dying.â
Erin laughed, and the tension broke. Claireâs shoulders eased, and Andy was suddenly aware that he was smiling like a complete idiot.
Erin softened. âAndy, none of us is here for the points, not really. We brought you here because we want to be with you.â She looked at Claire, then at Sam. âIsnât that right?â
Sam shrugged, but there was real warmth in her voice. âI mean, youâre my best friend. If I didnât like you, I wouldnât be up here at the ass-crack of dawn.â
Andy laughed, despite himself. It was hardly the âass-crack of dawnâ, but Sam was a notoriously late sleeper.
They lingered on the bridge a while longer. Eventually, Sam and Erin went to the far side to toss pebbles into the water, trying to see who could get closest to a bullseye on a flat stone without startling the fish. Claire remained by Andy, silent but steady, her presence both question and answer.
When the others were out of earshot, Andy turned to her. âI donât want to hurt you,â he said. âEither of you.â
Claire shook her head, then wrote:
Thatâs not your call. You get to be loved, too.
He blinked, trying to process the depth of the words. He looked at her, really looked, and saw in the set of her jaw and the defiance in her eyes that she meant every word.
He reached over, squeezed her hand. âThank you,â he said. âI mean it.â
They watched the koi, side by side, until the others came back, laughing and out of breath.
âReady to keep walking?â Erin asked, voice lighter now.
Andy nodded. âYeah,â he said. âLetâs see where the path goes.â
They set off again, following the winding trail deeper into the grove. The bamboo grew denser, the air cooler and sweet with the scent of green things. It felt, Andy realized, like walking through the inside of a living cathedral.
Sam, for once, didnât try to fill the silence. Erin matched Andyâs pace, her arm brushing his with each step. Claire took the lead, her tail flicking in anticipation, her notebook held to her chest.
They kept walking after the path turned away from the lawns, winding back toward the quiet of the bamboo. The day had warmed just enough to leave the pondâs surface a little misty, blurring the mirror image of the stone bridge and the trees around it. Andy felt the words building inside him, crowding his chest like a bottlenecked flood, but for a long time he said nothing.
It was Claire who broke the spell. She stopped near a little bench set under a tangle of flowering vines, sat, and patted the space beside her. Erin joined immediately, sitting on Andyâs left; Sam landed on Erinâs other side with a practiced flop.
For a moment, the four of them just sat, staring at the shifting koi and the leaves above.
Andy realized he hadnât had so much as a heartbeat of real privacyâreal safetyâsince before college. But here, among the three women, with the filtered green light and the hush of the wind, he felt safer than heâd ever allowed himself.
He looked at each of them in turn: Claireâs silent, intense focus; Erinâs steady, dark-eyed readiness; Samâs irreverent smirk, softer than usual.
He took a deep breath. âI want to tell you all something,â he said.
Sam, for once, didnât make a joke. Erin nodded, and Claire turned to face him, tail wrapping around her knees.
He picked at a loose thread in his shorts, watching his own fingers instead of their faces. âI havenât told anyone the story, except Marissa, and only because she was my therapist at the time. You may know pieces of it, but⌠I need to share some more.â He paused. âItâs not the whole story. I canât⌠not yet. Not even Marissa knows it entirely. But I want you to know.â
He looked at the pond, saw the blur of orange and white below the waterâs surface, and let the words come.
âThere was this girl. Laura. We grew up togetherâsame street, birthdays three days apart, same babysitter for a few years. We met before we could even hold our heads up. Inseparable since. She slept over countless times, we roamed Willow Run together, and she⌠she was my world. She was my best friend until middle school, when everyone else started seeing her as, you know, a girl.â
He paused, groping for words. âWe used to have this placeâa footbridge over the river, behind the old mill. When we were kids, we used to dare each other to run across it as fast as we could. When we got older, it just⌠became our spot. If one of us was in trouble or needed to talk, weâd meet there. Laura⌠she used to joke weâd take our engagement pictures there. And⌠and I thought that was just how life was going to be. She was the center of my world, and I was the center of hers.â
He let the memory flicker. âI loved her before I even knew what that meant. But I never told her. Not really. And she loved me. But I was a stupid kid and didnât understand what we were becoming for one another.â
He closed his eyes, trying to smooth out the scarred edges of the memory. âAnyway, eighth grade. November. The river was up because it rained for a week. And there was this girl in class. Chloe.â He noticed the widening of Erinâs and Claireâs eyes and nodded slightly. âShe was into me. Left notes, little presents. It was innocent, and I just thought she wanted to be friends at first. Eventually, I realized what was happening. But I was Lauraâs, in all the ways that counted. Chloe was enthusiastic, and I didnât want her to make a fool of herself, or to build up her expectations. So I asked her to meet me behind the gym. I wanted to tell her I wasnât into her.â
Andy took a deep breath, the memories from that day indelible in his mind. âBut when she arrived, I donât know⌠perhaps she had misunderstood my intentions. I started my speech and she... she didnât even give me a chance to react. She straight-up kissed me. And I was surprised, but then pushed her away. Told her how I felt. I thought that was the end of it.â
With a deep sigh, he continued. âLater in the afternoon, rumors started spreading. âAndy and Chloe made out,â âAndy and Chloe are a thing.â I didnât see Laura that afternoon. And the next day, after school was over, Laura called my house. She was weeping, said to meet her at the bridge. When I got there, she was already atop it, and she was crying.â
He swallowed. âShe was hurting. She felt betrayed. Somehow, she had found out what had happenedâbut the story she had heard was much worse than what had happened. We fought. Stupid, pointless stuff. But I wanted to fix it, so when she tried to leave, I reached out to stop her. I slipped, fell, caught myself for a second, but thenââ
He stopped, breath shuddering. âShe jumped in after me. Pulled me out, got me to shore. But the current was strong, she was small, and she⌠she didnât make it. They found her body six miles downriver.â
His voice dwindled. âI keep thinking, if Iâd just let her walk away, sheâd still be alive. Or maybe if Iâd told her how much she meant. Maybe sheâd have never been so quick to believe Iâd betray her. I donât even know whose fault that rumor was. Sometimes I dream it was me, that maybe I donât remember, but I said something to try to be cool, or to make a joke, and it just⌠caught fire.â
He pressed the heel of his hand to his eye, the ache old but still sharp. âIf I hadnâtâif Iâd justââ He shook his head. âShe was mad at me, and she still jumped. Still saved me. She didnât even think twice. She died thinking I broke her heart. And⌠I canât move on from that. Thereâs a part of me thatâs still on that footbridge, still trying to stop her from leaving. A part of me still on the shore, drenched, watching as she is overwhelmed by the river and taken away from me. Thereâs a part that still waits to get down from that footbridge, with her. And I never even got to tell her I love her. I never got to say⌠all the things I should have said.â
He shiveredâhe never did that in front of people. But Erin was beside him, not touching but close enough that the heat of her leg radiated through his. Sam was quiet, for once, her gaze on the koi. Claire had her knees up, arms wrapped around them, tail coiled in a tight spiral, her eyes round and wet as glass beads.
Nobody said a word. Not for a long time.
Andy let the silence stretch, the story sitting on the air. He wasnât sure what he wantedâabsolution, maybe? But he didnât expect it. He never had. All he could do was lay the facts out, stone by stone, and hope the weight might feel shared.
Sam, apparently unable to bear the hush, finally reached over and put her hand on his. She didnât squeeze or say anything, didnât crack a joke about âtrauma dumpingâ or start a riff about river ghosts. Just sat with it, hand warm and present.
Erin shifted, her head down but eyes up, and scooted closer, their thighs pressed together now. Andy felt the contact as intensely as the pulse in his own neck.
Claire leaned into his other side, her head resting on his upper arm, her notebook pressed to her chest. Her tail looped around his wrist in a gentle, unbreakable hold, like a loop of silk that could anchor a whole world.
No one spoke for a long time. The wind in the bamboo was louder now, filling the space where words might have gone.
He cleared his throat. âI never really talked about it before coming here,â he said. âNot just Laura, but all of it. The bad parts. I figured if I did, it would make it real again. Or worse, it would just sound like a sob story to get attention.â He risked a glance at Erin. âYou remember when you're a teenager, how everyone had that one tragedy they knitted into their identity? I was always scared Iâd become that guy.â
Erin smiled softly, her eyes rimmed with red but not crying. âYou were never that guy, in college at least. If anything, you tried too hard to be the opposite.â
Sam snorted. âYeah, you were the king of âIâm fine, donât worry about meâ even when you looked like you hadnât eaten in a week. The amount of times I saw you living on Gatorade and protein barsââ
âOkay, okay,â Andy cut in, the barest hint of a smile. âI get it.â
âYou loved her,â Erin said, voice very soft. âYou still do.â
He nodded.
âYou can love us, too,â Erin said. âItâs not a competition. You get to keep every love you ever had.â
Claire scribbled a quick line and handed it to him:
You are allowed to live. You are allowed to love her and love us.
He blinked hard, reading it twice before folding the page and slipping it into his pocket.
Claire wrote quickly again, then held up her notebook for the others.
Heâs not broken. Just sad. We can work with that.
All three women laughed, and the knot in Andyâs chest loosened another turn.
They sat that way for a long time, the koi swimming under the bridge, the filtered sunlight slowly shifting. Andy breathed easier, the old pain aired out and a little less sharp. He didnât know if heâd ever get over it, but now he knew he didnât have to do it alone.
Eventually, Erin stood and offered him her hand. âCome on,â she said, voice wobbly but fierce. âWeâve got the rest of the day, and Iâm not wasting it crying. Weâll walk, or eat, or nap, or do whatever you want.â
Andy took her hand, then Claireâs. Sam grinned, happy to see her friend holding the hands of two women who could be so good for him. They walked back through the bamboo together, a tangle of limbs and voices, all a little lighter for what theyâd left behind.
Achievement Unlocked (Sam Collins): Gathering the Trinity +5 VP
They didnât make it two turns down the garden path before Sam grabbed Andy in a full-body, bone-crushing hug. She didnât say anything right away; she just held on, her cheek pressed to his shoulder, squeezing until he could feel her heartbeat against his ribs. Erin slid in from the side, wrapping her arms around both of them, her new, impossible chest squishing Andy from the left. Claire, for once, didnât need her notebookâshe wrapped herself around Andyâs other side, tail curling around his calf, her face buried in his shirt.
They held him like that for a while. He didnât try to wriggle free. The hugs were warm and a little awkward and absolutely perfect.
Sam let go first, stepping back with a little sniff and swiping her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt. âYouâre a real piece of work, Cooper. Iâm so damn proud of you, I could punch you in the face.â
Erin didnât let go, just shifted so she was leaning against his side, head on his shoulder. âYouâre a mess,â she said, voice thick. âBut youâre our mess now.â
Claire looked up, ears tilted and cheeks pink, then wrote:
I donât think Iâve ever loved anyone before. Is this how it feels?
She passed the notebook to Erin, who read it and snorted. âGod, youâre adorable,â Erin said. Then she looked at Andy. âI never stopped loving you, Andy. I just hated you for a while, too. Now I mostly want to tackle you and see if youâre as consistent as you claimed to be, two nights ago.â
She grinned, while Claire scribbled quickly:
I would like to try that as well, please. Together, if possible.
Sam looked at the page, then at Andy, then at the other two. âJesus Christ, Iâm going to need a lot of caffeine to keep up with you people,â she said, laughing. âJust donât make it weird, okay?â
Andy laughed. It felt goodâreal, clean, the kind that worked its way out of your chest without any shame or doubt. âI canât promise that,â he said. âBut Iâll try.â
He hugged Claire and Erin at the same time, then turned and pulled Sam into it, too. He kissed Erin on the mouthâquick and sweet, the way heâd used toâand she kissed him back, fierce but gentle. He kissed Claire next, tentative until she leaned in, her lips soft and eager. Sam shook her head.
âIf you kiss me too, Iâm going to murder you and leave you in the koi pond.â She grinned, then punched him in the arm with a bit more strength than necessary. It it made everyone laugh.
They walked the rest of the way back to the hotel in a clump, Claireâs tail swishing against Andyâs leg, Erinâs hand around his waist, Sam ambling on the other side like a sheepdog herding a slow flock.
The bamboo whispered around them, but this time, Andy heard it differently. Not as a warning, but as a kind of musicâa background to something growing, wild and strong and new.
They reached the edge of the garden as the sunlight shifted from green to gold, the air warm and sweet. Andy looked at the womenâhis friend, his loves, his teamâand realized that something had shifted.
Andy took the long way back to the hotel, following the shoreline where the tide had left a lace of froth on the black rocks. He needed air, and the steady sound of the waves to sort out the last twenty-four hoursâa day that had started with him confessing secrets to a best friend in the dark, and ended thus far with professions of love and him revealing Lauraâs story to three women who were dearest to him now.
Heâd almost reached the sandbar that curled up toward the lobby when he saw her.
Arabella was perched on a crescent of volcanic stone, one foot tucked under the other leg, hair streaming wild in the wind. She wore a deep blue dress that looked like a Grecian relic, but on her, it looked stately and seductive. Her feet were bare, white and elegant as gullsâ wings. She had, improbably, a silver thermos balanced on one knee.
She watched him approach with a gaze equal parts invitation and dare. When he was close enough to hear the rasp of the tide on her rock, she called, âGood evening, Andy.â
He considered pretending he hadnât seen her, but that wasnât their dynamic anymore. He climbed up the side, found a flattish rock next to hers, and sat.
âYou donât usually haunt the shoreline,â he said, shading his eyes.
She smiled, a flash of mischief. âEven Hosts must have their off-hours.â She offered the thermos. âWould you like tea?â
He nodded. âThank you,â and took a sip. It tasted floral, and it was delicious, but he could not place it. âNo offense, but you look like a Bond villain out here.â
She laughed, sharp and delighted. âA villain, is it? You wound me.â She poured herself a splash, sipped, then set the thermos down between them. âI suppose thatâs how it appears, from your side of the game, at least at this stage.â
Andy let the wind work on him for a minute before answering. âClaire told me. About the rule change this season.â
Arabellaâs eyebrow arched. âDid she, now?â
He nodded. âShe said the show never did direct eliminations before. At least, not like this.â
Arabella gazed at the horizon, lips tight. âThatâs true. You are the first season where Contestants are dismissed in real time.â She turned to him, and her voice was almost gentle. âIt was my choice. But the reasons, those are more complicated than simply a desire to shake things up.â
He picked at a barnacle on the rock, weighing his next words. âWhy change it now?â
For a long moment, she didnât answer. Then she said, âMany reasons. The Audience was tired of endless stalemates. They grew weary of harems that never resolved, that lingered forever in a state of suspended animation.â Her eyes glittered in the twilight. âAnd perhaps your cycle required something new. You, in particular.â
He dug a toe into the sand. âWhat happens to the women who are eliminated?â
She was quiet for a beat. âThey donât go home. Not really. Not as they were.â She glanced at him, the green of her eyes startling even in shadow. âThey remain bound to you, just⌠not as honored wives.â
He tried to keep his voice steady. âWhat does that mean, exactly?â
Arabellaâs expression softened, a melancholy Andy hadnât expected. âIt means they serve. They support. They live, but itâs a lesser existence. Concubines, if you want to be historical about it. Household staff, if you prefer modern terms.â
He shook his head. âI never wanted a harem. I donât want servants.â
Arabellaâs lips curved in a sad smile. âThat was never up to you, Andy.â
He let that sit for a while, letting the wind scuff his hair and the sea spray salt his skin.
She broke the silence. âYou dislike the word âMaster,â but you are one, by every definition that matters here. Even if you rebel against it.â
He shrugged. âThat doesnât make it right.â
âNo,â she agreed. âBut sometimes, in order to change the system, you must first understand your place within it.â
Andy bit his lip. âAnd you? Are you happy with your place?â
Arabella looked at the sand, her fingers working a tiny knot into the hem of her skirt. âI was made to do this, Andy. But even I can change. Hosts, like Masters, are not immune to regret.â She smiled, but it was the tired smile of someone who knew how little her own pain mattered in the end.
They watched the surf together, the silence stretching. A seabird circled low, then plunged, reappearing with a glimmering fish.
âI need to ask you something,â he said, voice thin in the wind.
Arabella looked up.
âIf someone is eliminated, do they always get an exit transformation, like Katherine did? Even Chloe, or Emi, or any of them?â
She seemed to choose her words with care. âIf a Contestant is removed before the end, yes, there is an exit. But I can assure you, I will never allow a transformation as harsh as Katherineâs to be repeated. Not anymore.â
He considered that, then asked, âCan you undo hers?â
Arabellaâs face shut down for a second. Then, softly: âNo, Andy. It is beyond me now. Once the season has ended and the contract is fulfilled, it is immutable.â She touched the golden ring on her finger, almost unconsciously. âIt is the one rule I cannot break. I am not a Producer, and in the case of my exit transformations, even one Producer might not be enough.â
Andy ran his hands over his scalp, the weight of it all hitting at once. âI want to take Katherine home with me,â he said, suddenly, the words out before he could censor them. âIf I win, or survive, or whatever, I want her to come too. She deserves better than this.â
Arabella looked at him, then out to sea, then back. âI was going to offer that myself. If you go home, sheâll go with you. She will exist as she is now. But she will be yours, and you may do with her as you wish.â The words were simple, but a current of emotion ran underneath.
Andy exhaled, relief and sorrow braided together. âItâs not much, but itâs something.â
Arabella studied him, a scientist observing a rare specimen. âYouâre not like the others,â she said, almost to herself. âThey always accepted the rules. Took what was offered, or rebelled in ways that only made them more predictable. YouâŚâ She shook her head. âYou surprise me, Andrew Cooper.â
He tried to smile, but it came out lopsided. âIs that a compliment?â
She laughed, the sound soft and real. âPerhaps.â
They sat like that for a while, not talking, the wind and the tide doing all the work of a third person in the conversation.
Finally, Andy broke the quiet. âWhy Chloe?â
Arabella looked at him, puzzled.
âYouâre so intent on getting me to give her a chance. Even when it hurts.â He caught her gaze, unflinching. âWhy?â
Arabellaâs eyes went distant, as if she were reading a script only she could see. âThe Audience is not always kind, Andrew. They tend to remove the women you show least interest in. Statistically, they eliminate the ones the Master avoids.â She shrugged. âIf you care for her, she has a chance. If you do not, she will be gone. Itâs that simple.â
He thought about that, the ugly arithmetic of popularity and survival.
âI never wanted to hurt anyone,â he said, voice thick.
Arabella nodded, sympathetic. âThat is why you were chosen. You might break the system, if you try hard enough.â
He looked at her, searching for a sign that this was a trick or a test. âCan I trust you?â he asked, blunt.
She smiled, and for a second, her eyes shone. âYou may trust me, Andy. But do not trust the game. Not entirely. And understand that I am the Host, and there are things I must do within the boundaries of the game.â
He accepted that, and, strangely, it made things easier.
He started to get up, but Arabella caught his wristânot hard, just a brush of fingers.
âI meant what I said about Katherine,â she said, voice low. âWhen you return to your world, she can go with you. But you must take care of her. She is⌠fragile, in her way.â
Andy nodded, understanding more than he could say.
She released his wrist, and he felt the spot tingle.
He made it two steps down the rock before turning back. âOne more thing.â
Arabellaâs lips twitched. âOf course.â
âThe other night, after the challenge, you came to my bed. You stayed with me. Was that real, or was it just⌠part of the job?â
She looked away, the wind catching her hair and sending it in a comet-tail behind her. When she answered, her voice was soft as memory.
âIt was real, Andrew. But I am still the Host. Even when I wish to be more.â
He watched her a moment longer, then let it be.
The sun was half down now, the world turned blue and gold. Andy walked the rest of the way to the hotel, the air crisp and alive around him. For the first time, he felt like he understood his roleânot just as a piece in the game, but as someone who might actually change it, if he tried.
He didnât look back, but he could feel Arabellaâs gaze on him, all the way to the doors.
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