Week 1 Fan Mail: Erica

“Alright,” Erica rubbed her hands together as she eagerly reached for the first item in her pile—the box was rather heavy, so she was getting pretty excited wondering what it might be. “Let’s see what kind of presents Umbra Claus brou—that’s a dildo.” Her expression fell as she hesitantly picked up the very obviously double-dildo-shaped object gift wrapped in black and red. “Looks like it’s from Shar, so that makes sense.”

Dear Erica, it was very much fun meeting you. I've loved you on the season from the start and it's no secret you are my favorite. The pendant is to signify that, I do hope you like it. You seemed to enjoy the carrot so very much I included this fun little item for you to share with whoever you like. Lafy Aife probably, but perhaps Cecilia? You looked divine in that outfit, and so I gift it to you. Lastly I made you a stick should you need it. You are doing very well, just shy of one hundred at my writing this, and I must congratulate you. I do not know what Sera has planned when someone passes that mark, but it is Very early in the show for someone to do so. If you do not mind, I suggest gifting some of your VP to those in last place to help them out and keep from tipping things over too soon. That said I fully expect you to win this season, so it might be a good idea to think about what wish you would want to make. Have fun, and don't forget yo keep your roommate warm, Shar.

“Not the kind of stick I’d expect based on the letter.” She moved the bundle of fabric inside around to see if something was buried under it. “I’m not gonna complain about having an extra bunny outfit, but—HOLY SHIT SHE GAVE ME A SWORD!!” Erica yelled excitedly as she unsheathed an Irish longsword, willing everyone else to hear her.

“Ooh, is that what Shar gave you?” Aoba stared at it with envy. She certainly wasn’t going to say no if someone wanted to give her a sword as well, though she knew this hypothetical sword would definitely end up being a katana.

“That’s bullshit.” Cecilia glowered. “Talk about fucking favoritism. I don’t even want to talk about what she gave me.”

“Sucks to suck, I guess.” Erica stuck her tongue out at her roommate. “Looks like it’s got something engraved on it… ‘Bata’, I think?”

“Knowing Shar, the engraving would be in Gaelic,” Sera explained, “in which case, she named it ‘Stick’, if I recall correctly.”

“All I know is that fan mail day is my favorite if all the gifts are like this.” Erica put her sword away and reached for her next bit of mail. “Oh yeah—thanks, Shar. Love the gifts. Even if the dildo is a weird touch.”

Dear Erica,
I once again find myself in contact with a kindred spirit who understands the power of destiny. Yours and Aife's relationship is beautiful! You have overcome so much and now you owe it to both of you to ensure that nothing gets in your way.
Stay confident, there will be those who don't see the vision of happiness, the utopia that awaits on the other end. It is your duty to drag them kicking and screaming to the promised land of Love!
You got this!
Noemi Castro

“Uh… sure.” Erica really didn’t know how to handle what was clearly, in her eyes, someone at least a bit unhinged. “I don’t know about the whole ‘destiny’ thing. I’ve only spent a few days with her out of the past like 16 or 17 years. I mean, I like her, obviously, but give us a bit of time to figure out what our relationship even is, y’know?” She hoped the next person wasn’t so… intense.

Hey Erica,
You don’t know me, and that’s probably for the best, but I hope you’re doing okay. This whole situation is weird, and I bet you never would have thought you’d end up in the harem of your childhood friend. I certainly never thought I’d be in the harem of my ex-boyfriend, alongside my girlfriend. Never even thought I’d have a girlfriend, really. I’m still not out to anyone outside the Hotel, and honestly the thought of it terrifies me. How did it go for you, when you came out?
Don’t want to end on that bummer, in case you had as rough a time coming out as I’m worried about, so good on you for keeping on top of your fitness routine even in this weird situation. If every workout ended like that one with Aífe then I’d probably break all my personal bests inside a month.
Emma Murphy (Harem Hotel: Storytelling Edition)
P.S. This brooch is for you, I think. It’s a hydra’s scale, which apparently is my theme because I’m a two-faced hypocrite, but I also got an extra long tongue out of that theme so I guess that’s cool.

[Hydra’s Scale Brooch
A large scale on a silver pin, that shifts in colour from green to blue depending on the light. Its magic can be used once to split the wearer into two bodies controlled by one mind for one hour.]

“Hope you’re doing good, too.” Erica nodded. “I was pretty lucky when I came out. Dad might have the looks of a MAGA idiot—comes with the territory of looking like a dude from a Bud Light commercial, but he’s actually pretty woke. And be careful what you wish for as far as my combustion TF goes. I’m gonna need to learn some moderation with that one. Thanks for the sweet brooch—I bet there’s a lot of fun to be had with that.”

Dear Erica,
Holy appropriate transformations Batman! 99 points in the first round is not a common accomplishment I'll have you know. I voted for it because it was sexy but you proved the bunny transformation suited you to a tee quickly. Sexiness and horniness aside you are doing great so far. It's always great to see someone that is so willing to help out their fellow contestants that are struggling with the show. People might think it's only because you have such a kind host and have things on easy mode but even on the lighter seasons some don't handle the situation of the show well. I guess I'm saying keep being the awesome, kind, and sexy bunny you are and don't let the show change you for the worse
A fan,
Sally
P.S. Bit of advice from a long time viewer. Don't let extremists with low self-control talk you into doomed escape attempts. They will never work

“Thanks, Sally. I hated it at first, but that upgrade I got made it totally worth it!” Erica gave a thumbs up before grimacing as she moved on to the postscript. “And yeah, the only reason I ent along with it was for Aoba’s sake. Definitely not happening again.”

Dear Erica
As the quintessential tomboy of your season, you have a duty to show your mistress just how wonderful and attractive tomboys are! ...Hah, look at me, talking to you like you haven't already been doing a great job of that already? Aife couldn't be happier! While I've never been much of a tomboy myself, my Daddy really loves tomboys. As her dear friend, perhaps you can also encourage her to spread tomboy goodness with the other girls!
Say, while we're on the topic, do you think maybe I should try going the tomboy route? I would SO love to be as cool and awesome and tough as you! ...Maybe not a bunny girl though. Please give me some of your best tips to being a cool and sexy tomboy that can win over anybody!
Thank your for your consideration,
Sylvia

“...What?” Erica reread it with a look of confusion on her face. “Uh… thanks? Go the tomboy route if you want, but I’d say don’t base your style on what some dude likes. You’ll look best in whatever you feel good wearing, and if he’s not a loser, he’ll also think you look hot. Your style is about what you think you look good in.” Erica was about to move on, before adding, “And maybe find something else to call him. Calling your boyfriend ‘Daddy’ just gives me the heebie-jeebies.”

To Erica
Hello fellow bunnygirl,
Yeah, so I’ve been told to write you solely because we are both bunny girls. The hosts do that sometimes. Hot DAMN! Scanning over the info about you. 80 VP in one sitting. Fucking hell. Way to go there. We have a literal sex Goddess on our season, and while she got close to that on her date, it was over the entire day and not all at once. Also, she ONLY got close. I would encourage you to cross 100 VP as soon as possible to find out if something special happens. Laura thinks something will happen on our season when that happens, which she’s been avoiding, because she thinks it will put a timer on the rest of us to get there, but your season has a set ending already, so I doubt it will be that.
Keep on Hoppin’
Chloe Stapleton,
Master’s Bouncing Fuckbunny
P.S. We were asked to include all gifts in a postscript, so if Sera doesn’t approve of the gift, she can easily remove it, and you won’t feel cheated. I’ve enclosed two pieces of candy that will cause your tongue to become prehensile and elongated for a time when consumed. Most of the couples on our season love these things. The others haven’t tried them yet.

“That’s an… interesting gift.” Erica scrutinized the pieces of candy in her hand. “Don’t know if it’d be something I’m into, but I’ll keep it in mind. I’m not worrying about VP right now. I figure I’ve got a pretty good safety net built up, so I’m just gonna focus on doing what me and Aífe feel like doing in the moment. I don’t want the sex to feel like a chore, if that makes sense.”

Greetings.
Well, I suppose some form of congratulations are in order. Maybe not how either of you envisioned how that childhood promise would turn out. Still, I do think the both of you have a good start for something good for both of you, heat of the moment or not.
And, also impressed with the fact you’re not looking to just hog her for yourself. Got to see many childhood friends in this show, and several winning out. Not all of them were that forthcoming that fast. Happy you behave as such, and also you’re up to the task of actually dealing with it and the others as it moves from a more theoretical statement to something demanding more… actual commitment as it becomes a more concrete reality, shall we say.
Also, I may not say it out loud to everyone in these letters but… look out still. You may be on the verge of being in the ‘safe’ zone, but given how scores are not altered to reflect how fast you ladies can climb? …Okay, not playing coy, your Host definitely has something warmed up to keep stakes and drama coming. Dunno why, but it has to be a thing. Cannot offer advice here without knowing what the drama will be, beyond keeping a cool head, be on your toes, and be there for Aife if this gets rough… And honestly, everyone in the group if they are the ones getting rough. Yup, I did mean everyone. I realize this will not always be easy, but… Aife is going to need help making sure all of you do get there nice and still looking like themselves not just in body but also mind. So, guess that leaves you the bestie/future wife to help you make sure things stay that way?
Sorry for the gloom. I had to spell it out at least once. For what it is worth, I certainly do hope I’m wrong, and you can keep enjoying yourself with no major worry. Hope you do get to keep what you got and be happy with it to the end.
Keep going,
Isabelle ‘Hardric’ Richards.
PS: Seriously and not, if you want to make your marriage here… You can, other seasons did. Just make sure everyone is okay with what the end result will look like. Hope you send invitations to other seasons if you do that.

“Thanks, and don’t worry—I’m obviously not gonna let my guard down after one week.” Erica shook her head. “Just please calm down with the ‘wife’ and ‘marriage’ stuff, okay? Sure, things have been going a bit fast for me and Aífe so far, but we’ve only been on one date, and that engagement thing was just a promise when we were kids. It made for good flirting, but I don’t think either of us are reading into it any more than that. Besides, I don’t know if I even want to get married at all, if I’m being honest.”