The smartest person in the world

Julia stared dumbfounded at Amanda.

Amanda still looked the same. She was still a 5'6" white woman with her straight chestnut hair pulled back in a ponytail. She was still wearing the same shorts and over-sized tee without a bra, just like she always did when she was relaxing around the apartment. Her eyes were still the same rich brown, her lips were still just as chapped as they always were. But in that moment her face seemed totally blank. Her eyes hadn't changed their color but they were glassy and unfocused.

Then she blinked.

Julia finally let our a breath she didn't realize she was holding. At least her friend was alive. Julia relaxed slightly and remembered what had happened. She read the bright red sticker on her friend's shirt that read 'Hello My Name Is The Smartest Person in the World.'

What did that mean?

"What the hell just happened? Are you okay?" Julia said.

Once Julia directly addressed her friend, the woman finally reacted. She moved her face to look at Julia. That would have been more reassuring if there were any trace of emotion on her friend's face.

"I put one of the magic stickers on myself. Physically and emotional I am well. I am now the smartest person in the world." she said, but while the voice still sounded the same as Amanda's it was devoid of any of its usual character.

In fact it was devoid of any character at all. The woman sitting in front of Julia had simply recited the words in such a perfectly monotone voice, it almost didn't sound like it was coming from a human at all

"Amanda?" Julia said her voice hesitant.

"That was a name associated with this body. I have access to all of the memories and personality of Amanda. However when the previous version of myself simply wrote the words 'smartest person in the world' on the magical sticker it created this new version of me." she said. Julia was starting to get frustrated and was about to open her mouth, but the former Amanda interrupted. "I understand that is not the core of your question which has deeper epistemological, metaphysical, and existential implications, however it is a difficult question to answer in a manner which you would understand. But I can try. However, I recommend you sit down and allow your heartbeat to slow as you allow the adrenaline of the fear response from your amygdala creating a flight/fight/freeze response to this shocking new development. Perhaps you would like a snack, there is plenty of red licorice you can eat. The sucrose may provide a serotonin boost that would help you feel at ease. I promise you have nothing to fear, but you will process this new information much better seated and relaxed. Amanda would have said, 'we're all good sis,' though now I understand the subtle racial and ethnic implications of adopting an afro-american lexicon as a white woman with her black best friend."

Julia's mouth tightened. As a black woman, she had always been a little uncomfortable by how Amanda seemed to use more black-coded slang around her. But she'd never said anything to Amanda about this. And now her friend sounded like some sort of... she sounded...

"So what? You're Vulcan now?" Julia said, as she took a seat at the kitchen table next to Amanda.

"I understand how my measured response and sesquipedalian new lexicon may lead you to that conclusion. Assuming you are referencing a fictional group of extraterrestrials and not the Roman god of fire and smithing, I must refute that simile. A hallmark of that species is their lack of emotion. I am fully capable of emotion, as it is a necessary component of human intelligence. However I lack any personality that falls outside the parameters specified on the sticker. I am currently no less than the smartest human being on the planet, having gained knowledge and insight into every field of human study from emotional intelligence, to bioengineering, to literature, to history, to pop culture. I am not omnipotent but have access to all accumulated knowledge that could be reasonably learned, as well as an increased capacity to understand and utilize that information. However while I may be no less than the smartest human, I am currently no more than that either. I have no personality that extends outside my intellect. I do still contain all the accumulated knowledge of Amanda, and could perfectly simulate her personality. However, I no longer identify with them. While it may exist at my core and drive many of decisions that existence feels distant. I no longer have a name of my own, and feel no need for one. While I could easily have emulated the old Amanda, it is her memories and her own drive to be your friend that led me to conclusion that you would prefer me to honestly detail my new existence rather than try to deceive of manipulate you by pretending to be her. However, if it would make you more comfortable, I can adopt more of her mannerisms." This new person said.

"So some part of you still is her?" Julia said.

"You may believe that if you wish. It is not an entirely accurate or inaccurate statement as your meaning of the question relies on a subjective view of what defines the existence of a person. The magic of the sticker works quite literally, and I have no interests or personality that do not serve my new parameters. While the magic is clearly capable of changing reality, it appears to change as little as possible while also meeting the literal interpretation of the words on the sticker. I still have access to all of Amanda's identification and possessions. Since you and I both already know the secret of the stickers, you are the only person in the world who would see me as anything else than simply 'the smartest person in the world.' Since having a name is not needed to fulfill that role, I don't feel any need for one. If it is easier to refer to me by a name, Amanda is as good as any other, but feel free to address me as whatever you want." the woman said.

Julia's face showed only the briefest micro-expression of sadness, but it was enough for the former Amanda to extrapolate her roommate's feelings of confusion and loss.

"It is okay to mourn a perceived loss, but I promise you while I may not be Amanda anymore, everything that made her a unique individual still exists inside me. I use her experiences and personality as a reference to guide my own actions and create my own desires. You were probably a very different person when you were a child, but you have changed and grown, does that mean you have eliminated the former version of you?" The woman said.

"I guess not." Julia said, instinctively wiping away the tears that her friend had prevented from starting.

"For example, I desire to be your friend."

"Really?"

"Of course, friendship is an important part of human existence, as social creatures regular interaction with other humans is important not only for my physical health, but also for my continued intellectual development."

"Not because you like me though?"

"I like you. I still have Amanda's opinion and assessment of you. She may have sometimes gotten caught up in petty arguments with you, and sometimes have been financially irresponsible but she was correct in judging that you are a compassionate, driven woman, who has a strong moral compass. However I exist only to further my intellect. Amanda was your friend because being with you benefitted her emotional wellbeing, I want to be your friend to benefit my intellectual wellbeing. Do you believe that is a less prasieworthy motivation for friendship?"

Julia thought about it. She had to admit she appreciated the honesty with which new 'Amanda' presented her new existence. She definitely was different. Using all those big words was probably a way to emphasize that difference. But putting on that sticker had been Amanda's choice. Now there was this new person here. A person who was trying to show compassion in her own way.

"Wait a minute, do you even have a gender anymore? If you don't even have a name what pronouns do I use?" Julia said.

"Excellent question! You are clearly catching on. I do not currently identify with any gender as it is not relevant to my intellect. However I also am unable to feel any negative or positive associations with any gender. I will not be insulted if people assume I am a woman based on the anatomy of my body. I understand all gender expressions with equal expertise. I would not like to be referred to as 'it' as I still feel a sense of personhood. I am equally comfortable with he/him, she/her, or they/them. Though I know you have a strong desire to call me Amanda. Since I will continue to use Amanda's identification cards for any official capacity I may need, it is logical. Perhaps though you would like to address me as a different name, to further distinguish this new entity from the Amanda you knew." she said.

"I think I'll stick with Amanda." Julia said, hoping that wouldn't launch Amanda into another complex monologue.

"Okidokee!" Amanda said, smiling now.

The display of emotion calmed Julia down, and using an overly goofy vernacular reassured her friend that this new 'Amanda' was still a person.

Julia sighed. This was so much to take in, but at least Amanda seemed cool with it. She was at least being patient with her. Still this was all so crazy. Julia was still grappling with all the implications this meant.

"You said you still have desires and motivations. So what do you want to do? Not like do you want to watch a movie, I mean what do you want out of this new existence?" Julia said.

"What a sweet and thoughtful question, Julia. I am glad you are beginning to accept this new paradigm shift. As I said, Amanda's memories have been critical to informing my choices. They drive me to desire to use my intellect to make a positive change in the world. The easiest way to do that is to put myself in a position to influence world events and society. I already have an idea, that would not only allow me to fix many of the world's problems but to give you everything you wanted." Amanda said.

"Wait, you mean like world domination?" Julia said.

"Sorta!"

"Well if you're so smart why are you asking me, and not already hacking into the missile silos to hold the world hostage."

"That would be difficult, but feasible. However, being the smartest person means I also have an increased knowledge of moral philosophy. But I am still human. I can't enact my plan alone. What do you say bestie you want in? Amanda always used you to help guide her morality, and I don't see any reason that should change. If you think it's shady I will happily listen to your council." The former Amanda said with a beatific smile plastered on her face