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"So what are we even doing? I would at least like to have some clue what I am letting myself in for" Melanie sulked as the limo pulled out of the mansion gates.

"We're going to watch Chelsea play" Lucy answered.

"Sounds hot, but didn't we leave her back home?" Barbie wondered.

"She means the soccer team. Even I know that" Chantelle responded with a raised eyebrow.

"I mean the football team. Kindly refrain from using the S word while we are at the game" Lucy requested "Naked Mansion are sponsoring them this season, and the TV company also see this as an opportunity for what they are calling a strategic promotional partnership. I don't know exactly what they want from us, but we probably won't just be watching the match"

"This is so unfair! I just did the fucking talk show! It isn't my turn!"

"Sorry Mel, that's the price you pay for being one of the most popular glitches" Lucy attempted to console her friend.

"Who are they playing?" Cassie asked. She was the only one of the five who actually followed the sport, though only loosely these days.

"Crystal Palace"

"Ooh, Crystal Palace! That sounds so cute!" Barbie suddenly piped up "I think that is going to be my team!"

"No, our team is Chelsea because that is who we are sponsoring and who are promoting us" Lucy reminded her.

"Well I'm a Gooner for life and I'm not pretending otherwise" Cassie added unhelpfully, referring to her beloved Arsenal FC.

"I can't believe I'm going to spend nearly two hours of my life watching a game that could end in a goalless tie" Chentelle moaned.

Lucy shook her head and sighed. This was not going to be an easy afternoon.

"Welcome glitches!" the man with the clipboard greeted his guests excitedly. He was very pleased to see them, if the bulge in his trousers was anything to go by "We are so happy for you to become a part of the Chelsea family!"

"Arsenal. I'll always be Arsenal" Cassie muttered under her breath.

"So, we thought it would be fun to have glitches in the players dressing rooms doing interviews before the game, after the game and at half time. Chantelle and Lucy, you will be with the Chelsea players, Barbie and Cassie, you will be with Palace"

"Yay! Go Crystal Palace!" Barbie cheered enthusiastically, much to Lucy's chagrin.

"Don't worry though, all four of you will have some of the best seats in the house for the actual game"

"Wait, what about me? Do I even need to be here?" Mel asked hopefully.

"Absolutely, you're going to be the star of the show, Melanie!"

Mel was dismayed at that unwelcome development. Why did she always have to be the star of the fucking show?

"What does that actually mean?" she asked, unable to hide her annoyance at all of this.

"We are going to have you pitch side for the full ninety minutes, working with the mascot to hype up the crowd. At half time you are going to be on the pitch doing the prize draw, greeting sponsors and prize winners, making a few announcements for birthdays and such and then at the end of the game you will present the trophy to the man of the match. But the part we are most excited about, because this has never been done by anyone other than a refereeing assistant until now, before half and full time you're going to be holding up the board with the injury time minutes on it!"

Melanie was not at all excited by that news. That was two guaranteed full frontal close up body shots on live TV.

"How many people are going to be watching this?" she asked nervously.

"Palace are a decent mid-table team, but they aren't going to draw in the biggest crowds. You know, compared to Manchester United or Liverpool.."

"Or Arsenal.." Cassie added.

"Yes, or Arsenal" the man agreed "So globally you are probably talking about somewhere in the region of two hundred and fifty to three hundred million viewers"

Mel felt like she could pass out. She couldn't even begin to comprehend just how many people were going to see her naked today.