Never Have I Ever

It’s the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, the biggest drinking night of the year. Your conservative family doesn’t really drink, but you make such a tasty cocktail they can’t even taste the ****.

Parents and kids in bed, your wife suggests, “Let’s play a drinking game.” Because it’s coming from the much uptight woman in the family, nobody suspects a thing.

Your wife starts, “Never have I ever worn a dress that’s shown my knees.”

Even your sisters have to drink at that one.

“Never ever have I had sex before marriage.”

Your brother-in-law, your brother and his wife all drink.

“Never have I given oral sex on the first date.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

“Never have I let a man finish on me.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

“Never have I ever been naked in front of more than one person in a room.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

“Never have I ever slept with more than ten people.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

“Never have I ever been blacked out at a party and a black guy fucked me in the ass.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

“Never have I ever gotten implants.”

Your sister-in-law drinks.

She’s wasted. Everyone else is totally sober. You can feel the judgement from the group. She’s not one of you. A whore has infiltrated the family.

You say, “No way you have fake breasts.”

“DoTooWannaSee?” She slurs. Her hands reach to her shoulders to pull down her dress.

You grin in anticipation. Your plan worked. Time to enjoy the reward.